Wysz goes to Europe

I went on a European vacation. My observations:

Europe has a lot of cool stuff. Some of it appears in the pictures below.

Europe has a lot of churches. This is one of them. A large European Church

Someday...
Wysz on the red carpet at Cannes

I want a Swiss Guard.	This is the Coliseum. It is old. And busted.
This is the set of a scene from an episode of Das Traumschiff, a German version of Love Boat. They are on an excursion in Rome. I may appear in the background, but I will probably never see the show. If anyone out there is in Germany, let me know if I made it.	This is Malta. It has its own language and currency. Both are useless off the island. Since it was once controlled by England, they drive on the wrong side of the road.

Monaco is awesome. It is so wealthy, that the streets are literally paved in gold, making them a bit slippery. We got to drive the Grand Prix, but I don't think we won. There are a lot of Ferraris there. 650 Ferraris are registered in the principality, not to mention those belonging to the many rich guests. They even have BMW and Mercedes taxis. Also, there were police officers everywhere. There is one per every 16 residents. You drive right into Monaco from France, with only a small sign telling you that you have entered the principality, but the whole place can be closed in less than two minutes. With all the money they have, they should be able to afford a Segway for the guard who walks back and forth outside the palace.

The following three pictures are of Monaco:

Church.

This is where the prince lives. His flag was flying when we were there, which means he was home.

The large building in the back is a casino. They let me in, but I saw a few people get turned away due to their casual dress.

Europe has some pseudo-countries, which are technically separate from the real countries in which they are located. Examples are Monaco (a principality) and The Vatican (a Popipality). This is similar to the United States, where we have Native American Reservations and Canada*. There are some neutral territories as well, like cruise ships and international terminals of airports.

Italy has a lot of wine and olive oil. I forget what it was called, but their dessert wine was my favorite.

The Amalfi Coast is something to look at. It reminded us of Kauai. We also stopped in a small town that featured a guy who really, really, really loves paper. He took us on a tour of a paper factory and showed us how they used Medieval machines and also some from the Industrial Revolution to make paper using only cotton and water (no trees). The process was interesting, and it was also amazing how long the factory had been in operation, but the real attraction was the tour guide.

I liked the cruise ship, and I'm still convinced that the captain flew it when we were asleep. The best part of the ship was probably our waiter, Rod, who was from Chile. He was so honest about the (lack of) quality of many of the dishes. He will soon be transferring to Mariner of the Seas, which will be the largest cruise ship in the world. If you see him, tell him I said hello. The "Mr. Jack" drink guy and our assistant waiter were good too. We also liked the towel creatures created by Al, our stateroom attendant. Gambling on the ship fun, although I should have stopped when I won about $40 within the first 5 or 10 minutes. I still walked out with $2.50 more than I walked in with.

Even with all the good things Europe has, there are still have some things that they could learn from us:

Smoking is bad for you, and it is not polite to do in public areas.
Water is free. And cold.
Soda is served in containers with a minimum volume of 12 fluid ounces, but in most restaurants is "on-tap."
Small fruits, such as grapes, are seedless.
Men do not wear Speedos in public.
Public areas, such as restaurants, are air-conditioned.
"I Will Survive" is never sung in Spanish. ( )

Please note: When I couldn't remember specific facts, I just made them up.

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