Pick-up joke #3  1/23/05

A woman walked up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch. "I couldn't help noticing how happy you look," she said. "What's your secret for a long happy
"I smoke three packs of cigarettes a day," he said. "I also drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods, and never exercise."

"That's amazing," said the woman, "how old are you?"
"Twenty-six," he said.

 

Una Mas  1/22/05

Smart man + Smart Woman   = Romance
Smart Man + Dumb Woman  = Pregnancy
Dumb Man + Smart Woman  = Affair
Dumb Man + Dumb Woman = Marriage

 

The joke of the month  1/21/05

A plane was taking off from Kennedy Airport. After it a comfortable cruising altitude, the captain made an announcement over the intercom, "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to Flight Number 293, non-stop from New York to Los Angeles. The weather ahead is good and, therefore, we should have a smooth and uneventful flight. Now sit back and relax - OH, MY G-D!"

Silence followed, and after a few minutes the captain came back on the intercom and said, "Ladies and Gentlemen, I am so sorry if I scared you earlier; but, while I was talking, the flight attendant brought me a cup of coffee and spilled the hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my pants!" A passenger in Coach said, "That's nothing. He should see the back of mine!"

 

"So many different heads 1/16/05"

Here's the slang of the day; "I wouldn't ask Mary Jane for the answer -- she's an airhead!" Now, some of my New York friends call it Dick-head and so many different unaccountable heads from all over the world.

Let's see:
Banana, Balloon, Bone, Bubble, Cabbage, Cheese, Corn, Mush, Pin, Potato, Pumpkin, Rubber .....

Then, I see some from Hebrew;
Schnook, Schmuck, Schlump, klutzy ..... Actually, I know a guy named Klutz. Hey, this is nothing personal, nor Jews, of course. I used to have Jewish ladies around and I still love them.

Oh, yeah I've heard a lot of this expression some years back.
"Hello, .... nobody home?"

 

Kick in the Butts 1/13/05

Here is the talk of the day in New York City. I'll call it "Kick in the Butts." According to NY Daily News, the city has quietly launched a crackdown on New Yorkers who have bought tax-free cigarettes via the Internet. Some 2,300 city smokers were hit this week with warning letters from the city Finance Department, threatening severe penalties unless the back taxes are paid. Manhattan resident Shiela Hansen had the letter, saying she owes $ 900 in NYC cigarette tax.

This is the first big crackdown of its kind in the city, officials said, with the smokers' names coming from a landmark Virginia court decision involving the now-defunct Cigs4Cheap.com Internet site.
Hey, when the cig-tax was boosted up $3 a pack in 2002, I did quit smoking completely, nada! I knew something is coming, but I don't know if it's fair for all the smokers or not.

By the way, there's a penalty if you fails to pay and it cost you $200 per carton. In Hansen's case, that would be a penalty tipping $12,000.

 

A soul food from my hometown Jan. 7, 2005

It's called Hiroshima style "Okonomi-Yaki" and it means " A grilled dish whatever you like." However, it's a sort of Crepe dish, come with lots veggies, thin sliced pork berries and Udon or Chinese style noodle. My town Hiroshima City is the original birth place of it. So, I grew up with it and don't even remember when the first time I had it.

A couple of days ago a friend of mine wrote about his favorite "Okonomi-Yaki" place and then I found out the place serves the dish with Jalepeno and cheese, named "Italian style." It sounded so good to me, because I love those hot pepper. I was in the place this afternoon and the Italian style Okonomi-Yaki was perfect for me. The mix of the cheese and Jalepeno was an unbelievable satisfaction I ever had with the Okonomi-Yaki.

 

For the first time in 34 years Jan. 4, 2005

For celebrating New Year's, I cooked "Zo-Ni" and "Soupy rice with seven kinds of traditional Japanese herbs." They both came out very nice and tasty. Zo-Ni means everything in a pot, and it usually come with rice cakes, made for Gods pray. The only thing I want to complain is the air conditioning of the Japanese housing. It's so cold in my house, even with two big conditioners, because windows and doors are not for winter season. After living in New York City for 34 years, I get used to the central heating there.

New Year's Day 2005

It's been already five years since the new millennium.
Where are we now?

I don't think we feel any human perfection. It will never be perfected, 'cause we haven't gotta change ourselves for more than 30 thousands years.

 

©2005 Tadashi Yasunaga All rights reserved