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2004 August 6th Friday 12:24PDT - Magic

Friday at 04:45PDT, i was sitting at my iMac, playing Mah Jong Parlour from Aspyr. I had earlier dildoed myself repeatedly with the Mango Ripple buttplug, and now i was sitting on the Bronze Silicone, all the way up my ass. It was not going to budge, because my new Locking Harness of leather and steel was secured in place, brass mini-padlocks keeping all three buckles shut as it hugged me tightly. I squirmed happily and listened to www.SteveMindFunk.com as the silicone dildo curved toward my prostate and beyond, probably over 16cm deep. I had earlier listened to Sound of Water by Saint Etienne on the Subpop label from Seattle as i was making backup copies in MP3 format. My mood had meandered from sweet synth-bliss-pop to trance-a-delic, while my ass had gone from intrigued to deliciously satisfied. My best score so far was 11Fans, Limit Hand, 3712 Final Points, 1500 Paid, while East, grand total gain of +9000 paid points. I had my own flower tile (+1f), Kong of North wind (prevailing +1f), Poong of East wind of own chair (+1f), exposed Kong of 5Wan, Concealed Poong of 3Wan, Pair of 9Wan, 4 poongs or kongs and a pair (+3f), One suit semi-pure with Honours (+3f), and the winning tile was a Supplemental Selfpick drawn from the wall: 3Wan after converting the melded poong of North prevailing wind into a melded kong with a self-drawn tile (+2f). Table Limit is 1500 for Aspyr's version of the Parlour with Guardian Flowers and Seasonal occupations. I won so quickly: we'd had only approximately ten discards per player so far, and this was the very first hand of the very last round (Winter hand 1). I moved from last place to first place and soon won the entire Game of Four Winds in a surprise last-minute victory, all because of a Simple 3Wan (symbol of Earth) as my Loose Tile.

So a while later, i was lying on my bed with the bronze toy still embedded, peacefully watching a video called In Your Wildest Dreams, starring Kevin Williams' angelic anus and Chad Douglas' diabolical dick. I craved more stimulation and vigorous stretching action, so i tried something i'd never done before: i put a vibrator in at the same time. This was my inflatable rubber vibrator, and the two toys really tested my expansion capabilities. My colon was shaken powerfully as i wiggled and reamed myself. Then i switched back to just one toy at a time so i could concentrate on the visual stimulation, and occasionally write a paragraph or two when i wished to sit at the desk. The sun came up during these activities, i heard the seagulls honking, and i switched to natural lighting as it waxed through the cool grey clouds. Feeling a chill, i donned an old t-shirt from my job at ShowTime Video, and it was a little tight. I remembered when Brian B was visiting me in Vermont a few years ago, and i wore that shirt while we got high and he fisted me. I will always associate this burgundy colored garment with days of ecstatic ass-tastic-ness. It warms me inside and out. But i removed it later in the morning when i got more energetic exercise, working up a sweat with bigger equipment.

Progressing to the new black rubber buttplug, i switched back and forth between the expanding vibrator and the flexible penis-shaped toy. Then i worked the vibrator all the way inside myself, past the flared base, until the base itself was in me, the whole thing was pulsating at great depth, and only the inflation tube and vibration power cord were hanging from my ass. I walked around like this, holding the dial which determined the vibe speed, and let the dangling inflation bulb sway between my legs like a eudaemonic tail. Standing in front of my toilet, feet wide apart, leaning forward, i slid the index finger of my left hand in at the same time as the unusually deep and powerful vibrator; i took a long piss in this fashion, and it was a mind-blowing experience. Then i returned to my bed to lounge around, pulled the vibrator all the way back out (yaaaa!!), and moved along to the next item: Spelunker.

Spelunker could be affixed to the smooth board propped against the wall, and i rode it on my hands and knees, backing into it as though i were being drilled doggy-style. Then i stood the long, thick dildo upright on the bed and squatted over it, bouncing up and down vigorously in my frog-like pose. After some deep spelunking, i went back to the inflatable-vibrator-plus-additional-buttplug double arrangement. Without rubbing my penis yet, the tremendous sodomy caused semen to begin dripping from the tip of my urethral opening. Inflating the vibrator to its maximum size as it shook at top speed, i then squeezed my genitals with one hand while double tormenting my anus as i used my other hand to put an addition buttplug back in. As the black rubber plug reached its full penetration (maybe seven inches), it forced the swollen vibrator even farther. This pushed me over the edge, and i shot several strands of cum, gasping. I pulled the black buttplug out of my ass, and more semen squirted from my cock. I squeezed with my ass muscles until i launched the vibrator out of my rectum like a torpedo; more jizz dribbled. I unsnapped my leather cockring, and still more sperm was released in a final spastic squirt as i squealed involuntarily.

I rested for a minute, then put Spelunker back up my ass, seven inches deep or more, and jiggled it forcefully. I was crazed, drooling and quietly groaning as my body went beyond its usual limits.

When i had worked all the muscles in my ass, abdomen, hips, legs, and lower back, i moved on to the next toy: an even thicker joy, the Bam "Realistic", supposedly cast from a mould of the huge penis of its porn-star namesake. Bam also has a superior suction-cup, and i was able to ride it in at least three positions, including one where i lied back and worked it between my legs with a hunched inward thrust as my knees were near my shoulders and my feet were up in the air. In this position, i could watch more of Wildest Dreams.

There was a scene with some hardcore fisting and mega-dildonics, featuring a few hot dionysian ass-fanatics who had a toy from the "Jumbo Jack" line of products. I have a black version of this toy which is very smooth (i named this super cock 'Bounce'), and a sort of peach-colored version containing dual vibration eggs, (which i call 'Krakatoa'). In the video, one of the talented performers was getting fucked with a dildo exactly like Krakatoa, but it didn't appear to be a vibrator. I watched him take an impressive amount of this gargantuan beast into his hole, more than eight inches, and i did likewise with my rubber buddy named 'Bounce'. Then i went to the toybox and picked out my friend 'Nerf', from the 'PlowBoy' line of products that used to be sold in the Mr -S- Leather of San Francisco catalogue. This used to be my widest, heaviest dildo, until recently when i acquired a new gargantuan contender.

I managed to get Nerf about six or seven inches deep (and definitely more than four inches wide, for the most part), then rode on him with abandon, squatting and hopping in a hysterical frenzy. As i forced my ass to open wider than usual, i felt ready to try my newest, largest, most massive dildo ever: the manufacturers call it Gargantua, the seventeen inch beast. It is so huge, it seems more like a rubber sculpture than a "toy"-- diabolical! I squatted over it, stood over it, braced it in different places on the middle of the bed and also near the edges, but no matter how i lowered myself onto him, Gargantua was not penetrating more than about four or five inches deep (and at least as wide in diameter of dilation). Slightly frustrated by my greed, but totally happy with all the exercise, i returned to Nerf. Somehow my old friend didn't seem quite as daunting as he had in previous years. Hopping on Nerf, i inhaled some poppers, then rode the black beast at a swift gallop. When i could handle no more mega-insane ass-gymnastics of this caliber, i dismounted and returned to Bam.

Kneeling on the bed with my back and feet near the wall, i sat firmly on Bam so that he was embedded more than nine inches deep (and more than three inches thick). Another sniff of the nitrites, an increase in the pace of my gyrations, a relentless rubbing of my cock with one hand while the other squeezed and viciously tugged my scrotum, and soon i was blowing my second load of the night, the orgasmic intensity causing me to helplessly cry out softly as i triumphantly flung myself into my own puddle of urine, semen, sweat, drool, and lubricants. I let myself fall sideways, pulled the length of Bam back out of my ass with a final squeal and half a squirt, then caught my breath for a few minutes. When competence (and insanity?) returned, i put the bronze silicone buttplug back up my ass, sensitive to its gently multi-rippled shape.

The plug stayed embedded as i got up and moved some of my toys to the kitchen sink, where i submerged them for a soak in hot soapy water. I left Spelunker suction-cupped up against the board between the wall and the bed, and i left the black rubber buttplug lying on the sheets. These two, plus the third (bronze silicone) inside me were all potentially going to get used further during this morning of excitement. In the sink, i meticulously washed the inflatable vibrating buttplug, avoiding getting its controller wet, letting the cord dangle over the outside edge of the countertop during its ablution. I rinsed it, dried it with a paper towel, and put it away. I didn't ever want grease or bodily oils to remain on it for long, because the rubber might degrade, and it would be a shame to lose its capability to inflate.

While the rest of the toys soaked, i went back to my desk and sat with the bronze toy up my ass, typing and editing a couple pages of prose. Somewhere in the back of my mind, i was still imagining the sound and sensation of the vibrator between my spine and my prostate; my anal sphincter and inner muscles pulsated with satisfaction every now and then, and the small plug kept me smiling. There's nothing like a series of joyously self-inflicted potent ass-and-brain-rapes on a misty gray morning to keep a huge goofy grin on my face. Steve MindFunk kept thumping along on the big, efficient, ever-so-accurate Cerwin-Vega stereo speakers.

I kept replenishing fluids with herbal tea, diluted fruit juice, sugar-free ginger ale, and added a caffeinated cola at some point. This caused me to urinate a bit more often than usual, but it was fun to lean over the toilet bowl and let a stream of piss fly as i held the silicone ass-plug in place. The experience is difficult to compare to other types of fucking; there's a strange dual sensation of pressure being applied and released simultaneously, with a cathartic flow that makes me sigh and groan in approval every time.

I rewound the videocassette and made a mental note to send a duplicate of the tape to my friend Kenny some time soon. I picked up my burgundy t-shirt and wiped my face and chest, not caring that i was rubbing perspiration and greasy lubricants into the old memento. I tossed it on the spot where the most semen and fluids had puddled, slipped one of my dingy white jockstraps back on, and returned to the computer; the bronze silicone continued to provide relentless pressure. After another hour of word processing while ass-spasming, i felt like my batteries were recharged sufficiently for my next attempted sexercise. After another wicked minute in the bathroom, emptying my bladder under pressure until i could squeeze no additional drop of urine from my cock, i returned to my bed and faced Spelunker. I popped the bronze toy out of my ass, and spelunked the bigger dildo back in deep. Some days i just can not get my fill of ass-blasters until i've pounded myself repeatedly. On this particular day, i was exceptionally full of vim and vigour; it was astonishing to realize that my body could still occasionally reach those physical and emotional peaks that make me literally burst out laughing, singing, and crying on a sweaty, damp, morning spritzed by the imaginary Love Fairies. I pretended to show my gratitude to the invisible inspirational fuck-pixies by drilling myself with this long thick dildo yet again. It's made of a squeezable material which is colored sort of grayish-chocoloate, just like the nougat inside of a Three Musketeers candy bar. When it was buried way up my butt, i closed my eyes and imagined that men of all different colors and sizes were taking turns screwing my brains out with enormous cocks that felt the same as this toy.

My fantasies seemed even more intense, my imagination heightened, and i tried to make mental notes to incorporate some of the sensations and abstract images into my prose. I wished for the ability to telepathically transcribe those daydreams; but in reality, i had to stop and wipe my hands off every now and then, so i could go back to the computer, sit firmly with my big toy protruding, and type rapidly. I repeated this process so many times, i lost count; back and forth to the bed, to the iMac, occasionally swapping toys, always reaming my butthole. The feelings i have during these special occasions of hyperdildonic exertion can cause me to believe in a strange, deep, indescribable satisfaction at the core of my brain and my entire being. I don't know how to infuse this powerful sensation into all other parts of my life, but i attempt to do so by writing, practising my sexercises, and striving for new gymnastic horizons beyond previous experience.

I feel my body getting older, my mind growing slower; but i feel my ideas flourishing in a satisfying direction that will never diminish as long as i'm alive. These are the notions of which i convinced myself through systematic application of some of the greatest, most magical, most loving dildonic ministrations possible in my universe, while imagining additional dimensions of impossible ecstasy in my fantasies. This is part of my strategy to improve aspects of my health: when i'm healthy, i am always motivated to exert myself this way; when i engage in these exercises, i feel healthier; the process is an ecstatic loop of self-propulsion. I always want to want more, no matter how much i tax my muscles with the travails of my eudildonic dance. This is who i am, this is how i encourage my sexual relationship with my own body, mind, and dreams. The loftiest praise can only begin to explain how much i cherish the power to devote myself earnestly to these kinds of magic.

An astronomical concept of celebration flows to and from that core of my being, repeatedly, just like an imaginary dildo would. Vibrating buttplugs, rubber friends massing many kilograms, and a jizz-tastical lubrication effort were all part of that flow on this Friday. When i fantasized about living a life where every day held that potential for joy, a delighted smile stayed on my lips and in my eyes. Alone, but embedded in a universe of so many marvelous friends, i sometimes feel supremely serene. There can even be moments when i almost forget where and when and how i am; and i am simply myself, no matter how unbelievable, no matter how stunningly intense. I don't always know how to share this very well with other people, because it's such a masturbatory, concrescent, self-sustaining focus; sometimes i can only be what i feel is really my true ideal, and hope to explain to a few people later, if they care to share.

When the biggest toys were being washed, dried, and put away, i was holding the buttplug inside myself with my well-trained muscles all the while. Returning to sit in my ergonomic chair in front of the iMac, i spent more time writing. Then i noticed that slip of paper from a fortune cookie: it was still lying next to the little Apple Pro Speakers (i think those were made by Harmon-Kardon). It said, "There is a prospect of a thrilling time ahead for you." It pleases me to devote myself to aiming for such auspicous possibilities. There is no substitute for this sense of ongoing fulfillment and dedication. I have no ambitions; there are only my hopes, dreams, wishes, efforts, attempts, toys, tools, passions, and a touch of teledildonix.

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