Booker on the Titanic

Three little fishes all in a line

One drank water
One drank milk
One drank wine

Three little fishes see how they fly

One fit to serve
One fit to rule
One fit to die

Three little fishes see how they run

One said yes
One said no
and then there was one

Charles W. Booker was a cautious man
Who hailed from the Palisades in New Jersey
He started his carreer as a delivery man
yet he was ever abitious and never lazy

From contact with his social superiors
He learned the seven secrets of wise investment
By putting time tested formulas into action
He grew gradually wealthier by installment

He'd gaze down on the river
watching the ships go sailing by
and as he did he thought to himself
"What a fortunate man am I"

He soon owned a fleet of big red tugboats
and a famous seafood restaurant
His wife was a bastion of the Methodist church
His daughter also an aspiring debutante

But it was not untill it occurred to him
Watching his overweight daughter comb her hair
For "Booker's Digestive Miracle-Slim"
And thats how he become a millionaire

He'd gaze down on the river
watching the ships go sailing by
and as he did he thought to himself
"What a fortunate man am I"

Yet, new worlds to conquer needed he
At night he paced the flaw constantly

No social engagements or doctors prescriptions
Seemed to do a thing for his coniptions

The servants did best to stay out of the way
As he pondered great questions day after day

In mad dark hours passing strange
In nights dark black and sunset orange
pondered he relentlessly till finally
the wife said "You must get out of your head"

So Booker booked passage on the Titanic
He knew a sea voyage would do him well
Booker booked passage on the Titanic
What happened to him is the tale I tell

Where you'll meet the finest people
and no one goes to sleep 'till three or four
where you make the best connections
for real satisfaction
luxury is the life for me that I adore

Where everyday's a holiday
and each and every song they play
though you've heard it a hundred times before
seems brand new once more

Booker on the Titanic
First class all the way
We who are about to die
Are here to salute you today

Down below the afterdeck
where hoi polloi and da livin' wreck
count their change
they just want out eventually
Dey's the huddled masses yarnin' to be free
and actually dey look a little like you and me

A few cards'r missing from the deck
But ain't nobody bother for what the heck
all for fun
Some carry their lunch in a paper bag
Others wrap it all up in yesterday's flag
for the drinken messiah and the vainglorious hag

Booker had an idea
Oh what a great idea it was
He rushed up to his cabin
started writng fast and furious

He gwine run for Congress
To set the spirit of New Jersey free
But t'was just about den
da boat hit the ice berg on the sea

The whales started wagging they tails
It was the talk of da north atlantic
known as "A night to remember", also
"The sinking of the Titanic"

Water pawed over everthin,
the shiny silverware,
the champagne and the beef steak,
congratulatory telegrams,
and drownded out the voices of the screaming ladies
Mothers down below said "Someone save our babies"

Soap spilled out of soap dispensers
soup out of the turren
a coupla hundred died I guess
and not all of them were clean

Booker on the Titanic
Yes he's first class all the way
We who are about to die
Are here to salute you today

Booker survived fortunately
For as the band was playing
Nearer my God to thee
He took command of a lifeboat and bravely
navigated his craft over the sea
and when he got back he done paid me
to let everyone know the real story
and 'specially let the voters of New Jersey

Be of their home town boy most proud
of the one who done stood out in a crowd

And everybody gonna be in the big picture
when we's elect him a Senator