(b)log
This might be unappetizing. I found this article in
the b3ta newsletter. It is damn funny,
especially
for germans. I must know. I suspect it's written by a north american. I found it
extremely
amusing as I have heard similar criticism by my danish friend - and still, I
don't agree!
I just had to comment some of it (for easier reading in blue), but for the full fun including pictures go to his site and read it yourself! Gives you a good laugh for sure. Does it remind you of own experiences?
http://www.spies.com/~scott/misc/toilet.htm
My favourite is the experience with the "jumping turd"!
I just had to comment some of it (for easier reading in blue), but for the full fun including pictures go to his site and read it yourself! Gives you a good laugh for sure. Does it remind you of own experiences?
http://www.spies.com/~scott/misc/toilet.htm
My favourite is the experience with the "jumping turd"!
We also have the so-called standard
model here in germany to start with. Some people even have both version if they
have two bathrooms. At least we have a choice.
Ha!
Scott Anderson writes: "German toilets are quite extraordinary (...) The excrement lands on a bone-dry horizontal shelf, mere inches beneath one's posterior. Repeated flushings are required to slide the ordure off the shelf into a small water-filled hole, from which it hopefully disappears (...) It does not save water - you must flush it eight or ten times to remove every last scrape and smear. It is not hygienic - the smell is ungodly."
No, it's not bone dry as some water always stays in this concave part. And normally you don't have to repeat-flush... who knows what elephant-load he dropped there... obviously he never heard of a toilet brush for the "scrape'n'smear". I wonder if he ever cleans his toilet?
The only conceivable explanation is that Germans love to inspect their stool, so the German toilet of necessity features a built-in stool inspection shelf. Funny thing here: that's exactly how my mother calls it!
Further research has revealed that the German toilet is in fact designed to facilitate stool examination. This is a wise, healthy practice, argue Germans, a person's best defence against intestinal disease, water-borne parasites or worm-riddled, undercooked pork sausage. While this made perfectly good sense around 1900, thanks to improvements in public health the whole shelf business should have become obsolete shortly after World War II.
It is in fact useful for the discovering of worms and blood (in some cases a sign of intestinal cancer suspicion, where early detection is very important), and believe me - children still get worms, i.e. from chewing grass from the lawn where worm eggs from fox excrements linger invisibly! Do you really want to wait until they lose weight to find out they suffer from worms since weeks?
Germans, however, see nothing amiss. They actually like their toilets.
I do, too!
Some even dislike North American toilets. You splash yourself, they claim. I don't think this is possible. I've never splashed myself sitting on the toilet. For the wave to reach one's bottom, one would need to eject a hefty pellet at tremendous velocity. I think they're making that up.
This is the important point. It is true, it does sometimes splash on his so-called "standard" toilets! It does!!! And it's disgusting! Especially from my female point of view it sounds very unhygienic to have the toilet water splash up against you. Bäh!
As he is talking about (his personal) huge, massive logs throughout his report, I suspect he is one of many (typical) men who eat too much and too fatty, and as a result produce sticky, neverending turds that curl down and silently slip into the water like an amazonas anaconda! It happened once in my life that I found a non-flushable turd in a school toilet, and it was really disgusting. But it is not the average.
Germans are often said to be very strict, disciplined and accurate. I didn't think it was so unusual to clean the toilet with brush and cleaning stuff of some sort, whenever you did a "big business" that left trails, but maybe we are just really hygienic?
And as a last word, I have visited many friends, and family, in the United States and Australia, and I tell you: their toilets don't smell less than german toilets after someone spent 15 minutes in there! What an exaggerator!
Scott Anderson writes: "German toilets are quite extraordinary (...) The excrement lands on a bone-dry horizontal shelf, mere inches beneath one's posterior. Repeated flushings are required to slide the ordure off the shelf into a small water-filled hole, from which it hopefully disappears (...) It does not save water - you must flush it eight or ten times to remove every last scrape and smear. It is not hygienic - the smell is ungodly."
No, it's not bone dry as some water always stays in this concave part. And normally you don't have to repeat-flush... who knows what elephant-load he dropped there... obviously he never heard of a toilet brush for the "scrape'n'smear". I wonder if he ever cleans his toilet?
The only conceivable explanation is that Germans love to inspect their stool, so the German toilet of necessity features a built-in stool inspection shelf. Funny thing here: that's exactly how my mother calls it!
Further research has revealed that the German toilet is in fact designed to facilitate stool examination. This is a wise, healthy practice, argue Germans, a person's best defence against intestinal disease, water-borne parasites or worm-riddled, undercooked pork sausage. While this made perfectly good sense around 1900, thanks to improvements in public health the whole shelf business should have become obsolete shortly after World War II.
It is in fact useful for the discovering of worms and blood (in some cases a sign of intestinal cancer suspicion, where early detection is very important), and believe me - children still get worms, i.e. from chewing grass from the lawn where worm eggs from fox excrements linger invisibly! Do you really want to wait until they lose weight to find out they suffer from worms since weeks?
Germans, however, see nothing amiss. They actually like their toilets.
I do, too!
Some even dislike North American toilets. You splash yourself, they claim. I don't think this is possible. I've never splashed myself sitting on the toilet. For the wave to reach one's bottom, one would need to eject a hefty pellet at tremendous velocity. I think they're making that up.
This is the important point. It is true, it does sometimes splash on his so-called "standard" toilets! It does!!! And it's disgusting! Especially from my female point of view it sounds very unhygienic to have the toilet water splash up against you. Bäh!
As he is talking about (his personal) huge, massive logs throughout his report, I suspect he is one of many (typical) men who eat too much and too fatty, and as a result produce sticky, neverending turds that curl down and silently slip into the water like an amazonas anaconda! It happened once in my life that I found a non-flushable turd in a school toilet, and it was really disgusting. But it is not the average.
Germans are often said to be very strict, disciplined and accurate. I didn't think it was so unusual to clean the toilet with brush and cleaning stuff of some sort, whenever you did a "big business" that left trails, but maybe we are just really hygienic?
And as a last word, I have visited many friends, and family, in the United States and Australia, and I tell you: their toilets don't smell less than german toilets after someone spent 15 minutes in there! What an exaggerator!
Posted: Fr - Dezember 19, 2003 at 10:23 Uhr
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Published On: Okt 16, 2004 02:18 Uhr
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Published On: Okt 16, 2004 02:18 Uhr