Fleetwood Mac sucks without Peter Green


"I know what it is like to be dead"

What a morning. The one thing that is interesting in all of the excitement is that when you throw a big pile of shit up in the air, you get a LOT of information coming out of it. Trouble is, when it lands you can't always call it 'sorted' as much as 'sordid.' Sorry, didn't mean to write that, it just happened. Like underwear made out of hair.

So, the whole 'troll' posts are now a complete cycle. It is done. But, the story explodes with new intrigue and confusion. I mean, sitting in a pair of pants worn by a guy who has NO idea who to believe, I can honestly say that everything in the world points to a need for more of my world stewing in its own juices. Huh?

Let's go back and see just how fucked up my life is. Actually, no, let's not. Let me apologize to Michael and/or tell him he really IS an asshole. It is one or the other. I sincerely don't know which it is anymore. It really doesn't matter. That is the funniest thing.

By one account, Michael pushed for Janet to invite him back to her room. They are grown ups, what is the big deal? Well, Janet was supremely depressed and suicidal. She was in a " bad place" by any account. Asking her back to her room for cheap sex is just pathetic and horrific. Add to that Michael's knowledge of Janet's involvement with Ron and subsequently Ray (who completely took advantage of Janet in this same way...under the guises of friendship). The picture is ugly. To hear Janet tell it, she (her quoting Michael) "put him out in the cold with a hard-on"...sweet guy isn't he?

But, then I get the story from the other side. The "he said" version. In this version Janet invites Michael back to her room and he declines noting that she is really sad and not well. Michael makes a strong point of telling this story "upon coming in the door" when he gets home. Who did he tell this alibi, uh, explanation to? His girlfriend.

You can see where I'm going here. People lie. It is all lies. Truth is, none of this is true. Yet, there is a truth behind it. So, here goes the head-spinning wondering...

Why did Michael go so out of his way to pre-emptively clear that "Janet was odd" right after being with her. That suggest an action of guilty conscience. Further, why would Janet tell me this story of Michael asking her to take him to her room if that is the one thing that would surely raise hell in the relationship she is supposed to be devastated to lose? Why would Janet have such an elaborate version of her rejection of Michael? Might THAT be bullshit? Why would Michael send her his blog URL at the end of the night? Is he truly helping her deal with depression? Maybe so. There is nothing to suggest otherwise.

Thing is...again...someone's full of shit. Either my wife is just hiding (by telling me preemptively about it?!?) another affair or there is yet another sleazy fucker out there who'd screw a depressed woman with no regard for her well being.

Is it any wonder I am looking out for myself these days?

The worst part of all this is that Michael's girlfriend, Sony, got a face full of all this. THAT sincerely makes me feel bad. In the end, Michael, if you are the scumbag that you would be in one of the cases above, well, you don't deserve anyone kind or nice. You don't deserve Sony. But, there is no proof that you are the asshole she doesn't deserve.

It was put forth that there was no reason NOT to trust Michael and that I probably trust Janet. In the end, I trust no one. In an anarchic system, if a guy has guns you have to assume the worst. You can't allow that he is just doing it for self defense. You have to go get your own guns. Trouble is, then other people see your defensive guns...and, well, you're smart...you get it.

Posted: Thu - November 20, 2003 at 09:44 AM      

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