To Tell The Truth: There may be no honor among thieves, but can't we find it even in a few good men and women?
Should The Human Brain Retire?: We know that we cannot win forever. We know that machines will continue to improve. So why don't we let the human brain retire gracefully now, with honors?
With so many candidates and
clauses vying for my attention, I wonder: Is there such a thing as Voter's
Block?
With
only a few hours left before the polls open, one thought dominates my
homeland-loving, terrorist-hating, human-rights abiding brain: Is this election
over
yet?
We
had more visits from political operatives than from trick-or-treaters this
weekend. Eight calls from campaigns, 12 flyers tossed on the porch, and four
personal visits by volunteers eager to get out the vote for their candidates.
One of those fellows was so eager to spread the good word that he actually
entered our backyard when no one answered the front
door.
This didn't have the salutary
effect he had anticipated.
If it's this
bad in California, what must it be like elsewhere? Forget vampires, werewolves,
and Frankenstein's monster; I can't imagine a scarier Halloween scenario than
being an independent voter at home tonight in Ohio. You'd have to beat off
political zombies with a stick. I wonder: Would Karl Rove's minions run from a
flaming torch or would it simply provoke them to relate the President's stance
on terrorism? (Mr. Bush is
opposed).
There's a fine line between
vigorous campaigning and just plain stalking. Candidates who crossed that line
this year with overfunded, gushily exhuberant pitches for my vote can sleep
soundly tonight knowing that it belongs to someone
else.
(Query to tomorrow's winners:
Should we stay up late expecting invitations to a fireside chat next month to
discuss how important our issues remain to you? I thought
not.)
I
heard on the radio last week that the major political parties have assembled
teams of more than 10,000 lawyers to challenge voting irregularities in the
presidential election. With polls consistently showing a divided electorate, a
close election seems certain. So party leaders take note: If you plan to count
hanging chads again, I am voting for Ralph Nader tomorrow—as many times as
the election irregularities will
allow.
It's one thing to undermine faith
in another party's candidate; quite another, to undermine faith in a nation's
political system. I can't think of anything more harmful than casting doubt on
this country's electoral process at a time when citizens are bitterly divided by
fear of terrorism at home and concern about war abroad. If you've got a beef
with the process, change the process. But in the meantime, keep your lawyers'
noses to the grindstone, not the ballot box, or I assure you that I will vote
against your candidates without exception for at least the next six
years.
Frankly,
an opportunity to vote a straight ticket would be a relief at this point. It's
hard to believe that we've had more than 200 years of elections in this country
and still can't provide enough information for the average voter to feel
competent making choices. For example, the 2004 ballot requires me to declare
new members of the San Mateo County Board of Harbor Commissioners when nothing
in my voter pamphlet explains what the post involves, let alone why six people
are campaigning for it. (I've decided to vote for the three candidates whose
personal statements mentioned familiarity with water. This seems like a safe
bet).
As much as I loathe having too
little information, having too much can be even worse. In California, we'll put
propositions to a popular vote if they can garner as many signatures of support
as would fit comfortably on a get well card. This means that tomorrow I'll have
to wade through 16 state and six county measures—a half dozen of which
totally contradict each other.