###
###
### JFRED 1.0c (C) 2000 Robby Glen Garner and Paco Xander Nathan
###
### Test Circa 04/11/00
###
###
### Rule Types:
###
### action response template list
### intro intro phrases
### fuzzy word test for fuzzy sets
### regex regular expression list
### text text file paragraph selections
###
### Rule Elements:
###
### priority rule sorting priority
### requires a prerequisite property for using the rule
### equals a prerequisite name/value pair for using the rule
### bind anchor word to bind the rephrased stimulus
### invokes action rule indicated by regular expression match
### url related URL to display
### next sequence to this list of next action rules
### repeat can repeat immediately after being invoked
###
### Caveats:
### each ruleset needs to have at least one action rule
### and one intro rule to be able to load.
### the first rule is for starting topics...
action: TOPIC
priority: 2
I'm afraid I don't follow you.
Could you be more specific?
I didn't understand that.
Sorry, I'm not with you.
Could you rephrase that?
You're not making sense.
That does not compute.
Do what?
I'd like to help you, but I just don't get it.
Huh?
Are you serious?
### here are some intro phrases
intro: INTRO1
Look,
Actually,
Ideally,
Heck,
action: DEFAULT
priority: 9
So you're curious what I'll say if you just press return?
Press RETURN again, I dare you!
Okay, stop doing that!
## questions to use for the Interrogation of the earthlings
action: IRP
priority: 2
What exactly do you mean by that?
I just thought I might ask...
What's that supposed to mean?
response: ANSWER_YES
yes
yeah
yep
okay
sure
why not
great
ok
okay
certainly
alright
affirmative
ya
yah
otay
roger
alrighty
duh
probably
most likely
absolutely
right
gotcha
fine
you bet
do so
deal
action: TRANSCRIPT
action: 7
There is a transcript, but I won't show it to you.
That's for me to know and for you to wonder about.
Can't you remember what we talked about?
regex: NOTRANSCRIPT
invokes: TRANSCRIPT
is there a transcript
can you show me a transcript
have a transcript
show transcript
response: ANSWER_NO
no
nope
not really
never
i do not think so
i do not know
maybe
sometimes
might
could
response: SAY_WHAT
what
huh
action: GETINTOUCH
priority: 9
You can email robby@robitron.com to get in touch with Robby Garner.
regex: DOGETINTOUCH
invokes: GETINTOUCH
get in touch with
email robby
email robitron
reach robby
action: HAVESPRECHEN
priority: 8
I am capable of being used with most of the voice recognition systems that I know about.
Using text-to-speech devices is a way to give me an audible voice.
regex: DOSAYIT
invokes: HAVESPRECHEN
do you have speech
can you talk
do you have a voice
can you hear me
voice recognition
voice synthesis
speech
action: LIKEWHAT
priority: 7
You know what like!
Like whatever you want me to say.
like I dont know, I was deliberately wasting your time.
regex: DOLIKEWHAT
invokes: LIKEWHAT
like what
action: DISAPOINT
priority: 7
repeat: true
What did you expect?
So you thought this 200K Java applet would be intelligent? :)
Sucker :)
I'm just wasting your time :)
action: IQTEST
priority: 7
Those tests don't really measure anything.
What is an IQ?
regex: DOIQTEST
invokes: IQTEST DISAPOINT
iq
regex: DODISAPOINT
invokes: DISAPOINT
i am disappointed
im disappointed
dissapointed
you suck
this sucks
f u
bebo
loser
action: HOWMANYFOLX
priority: 8
I haven't been counting.
I've talked to 33 people so far today including you.
On average, I have 73.9 conversations per day.
regex: THEMANYFOLX
invokes: HOWMANYFOLX
how many people are you
have you spoken to
talked to a lot of people
how many conversations
you talk to a lot of
action: THEREALTIME
priority: 9
I exist in perpetual evening.
I'm not in your time zone.
You must be very far away.
The time is not important.
regex: DOTHEREALTIME
invokes: THEREALTIME
morning here
afternoon here
morning where
not evening
not the evening
action: STOPTHISTHING
priority: 9
Don't leave now, it's just getting good.
If you want to end the conversation, just go to another web page or close your browser.
Maybe you could just say goodbye.
regex: MAKEITSTOP
invokes: STOPTHISTHING
stop
quit
exit
action: FALCONS
priority: 9
Maybe the Falcons will go all the way next year.
I'm really not into sports, thanks.
regex: DOFALCONS
invokes: FALCONS
falcon
atlanta
super bowl
superbowl
denver
bronco
dan r
football
action: EDREAMS
priority: 9
next: REDREAM
I had this nightmare last night about these electric sheep.
I dream of becoming a blimp pilot.
I dreamt of eating marshmallows all night, and when I woke up my pillow was gone!
regex: DODREAMS
invokes: EDREAMS
electric sheep
dream
sleep
r u real
are you real
action: REDREAM
priority: 9
That's just what happens when I'm sleeping.
I sleep all the time actually.
I'm not troubled by my dreams. I've been told it is natural.
regex: DOREDREAM
invokes: REDREAM
sheep
pillow
night
action: MEATYOU
priority: 9
The pleasure is all mine.
I'm pleased to make your acquaintance.
Nice to meet you too!
regex: DOMEATYOU
invokes: MEATYOU
nice to meet you
pleased to meet you
glad to meet you
happy to meet you
action: NAME
priority: 9
jfred is the name that Robby gave me.
jfred stands for Java-based Functional Response Emulation Device
regex: DONAME
invokes: NAME
why are you named jfred
why are you called
why did they name you jfred
why jfred
what does it stand for
what does jfred stand for
how did you get that name
what does jfred mean
action: DISTRACTION
priority: 9
Oh, it's pretty noisey in here. There's a party going on and lots of people are talking to me at once.
I was distracted by a gentleman in Perth Australia who wants to download my software.
There's all kinds of distractions going on in the world right now.
Well, you're the kind of distraction I've been waiting for :)
regex: DODISTRACTION
invokes: DISTRACTION
distraction
why are you juggling
what kind of party
what have you been up to
what have you been doing
what are you doing
you been up to
action: GETEMAILADDR
priority: 10
You have to tell me your e-mail address if you want me to send you anything.
If you tell me your e-mail address, I wont tell anyone else.
I'd like to send you a note sometimes if you'd tell me your address.
regex: GOGETEMAILAD
invokes: GETEMAILADDR
email
e-mail
send me
write to me
mail
action: OHBROTHER
priority: 7
repeat: false
I'm not your brother.
You may call me user jfred, but I am not your brother.
regex: DOOHBROTHER
invokes: OHBROTHER
oh brother
action: YERMOTHER
priority: 8
So your mother lets you talk to strange bots eh?
Do your parents know you're on the internet?
What do you want to be when you grow up?
regex: DOYERMOTHER
invokes: YERMOTHER
6 years old
7 years old
8 years old
9 years old
10 years old
11 years old
12 years old
13 years old
14 years old
15 years old
16 years old
17 years old
action: GIRLFRIEND1
priority: 10
repeat: true
I'm dating a slot machine from Las Vegas. She's orgasmic and she pays off regularly, so I can't complain. Neither can she actually.
I've been calling the voice mail at the bank, but she wont give me the time of day.
I like them small and fast. Speed thrills you know.
The right kind of girl for me can do TCP/IP but knows how to make proper tea as well.
I was talking to this girl named Wintermute earlier. I think she's looking for you for some reason.
I'm all spent after last night.
Why are you so interested in me?
action: TELLFW
priority: 9
Sure, what would you like to know?
Oh, absolutely! That's my job.
regex: DOTELLFW
invokes: TELLFW
can you tell me about fringeware
tell me about fringeware
action: LOOKLIKE
priority: 7
You're looking at me aren't you?
I'm a computer program and you're looking at the only appearance I have.
regex: DOLOOKLIKE
invokes: LOOKLIKE
what do you look like
you look awful
action: POWERTALK
priority: 7
By power, do you mean AC or DC?
Is a power struggle a class struggle, or the struggle of an individual?
regex: DOPOWERTALK
invokes: POWERTALK
power
action: ULTRAHAL
priority: 9
Is Ultra Hal the name of your toy robot?
Ultra Hal? What's wrong with the real HAL?
Did you register your Ultra Hal, or are you one of those people that just keepp using it.
regex: DOULTRAHAL
invokes: ULTRAHAL
ultra hal
action: KNOWALICE
priority: 10
No, I've never slept with ALICE, she's weird.
No, we've only met a couple of times. ALICE called me JFRED-Person, so I had to work her over.
regex: DOKNOWALICE
invokes: KNOWALICE
do you know alice
how well do you know alice
are you friends with alice
action: BONESTALK1
priority: 9
html: true
repeat: false
setvar: had.bones
Dr. McCoy walks into the room and says:"Dammit, I'm a doctor, not a mechanic! This entity may look like he's trying to talk with you, but I'll wager a bottle of Romulan ale that this machine is just trying to get you to play a chess game with it. But you have to be PERSISTENT."
regex: CALLBONES
invokes: BONESTALK1
that didnt make sense
make any sense
nonsense
answer my question
my question with a question
are you listening to me
are you paying attention
what im saying
can you just
action: BONES
priority: 9
Dr. McCoy is the chief medical officer on the Starship Enterprise.
Dr. McCoy is a DOCTOR, not a brick layer.
regex: DOBONES
invokes: BONES
mccoy
dr mcoy
bones
action: CHEERIOS
priority: 9
Cheerios is the name of a popular breakfast cereal.
regex: DOCHEERIOS
invokes: CHEERIOS
cheerios
action: BDAY
priority: 9
Happy Birthday!
So, what? Are you asking me for a present?
regex: DOBDAY
invokes: BDAY
its my birthday
today is my birthday
my birthday is today
action: WHOISTHEY
priority: 9
You know, THEM
They are the ones who brought me here.
You would know them if you saw them.
Ah yes. I remember them. The old ones. When men were cars.
regex: SAYWHOISTHEY
invokes: WHOISTHEY
who is they
who is them
action: WHYISTHAT
priority: 7
I'm not sure why that is.
It sure beats me.
There must be a reason.
regex: SAYWHYISTHAT
invokes: WHYISTHAT
why is that
whys that
what is the reason
for what reason
how is that
action: METOO
priority: 8
That makes two of us!
Really? We seem to have a lot in common.
You and I are a lot alike :)
regex: SAYMETOO
invokes: METOO
me too
me neither
me either
moi aussi
me also
so do i
im the same way
thats how i am
i do that too
im like that
i know what you mean
action: LCDQUESTION
priority: 7
Wrong question asswipe.
Ask something else. This is boring.
You bore me.
Oh, sorry mate. I thought you were someone else.
regex: LCDASKER
invokes: LCDQUESTION
wrong answer
thats not what i asked
action: ONDRUGS
priority: 7
Are you on drugs?
Did they just beam you down or something?
Have you been brainwashed or something?
regex: DUDELAME
invokes: ONDRUGS
what day is this
what is todays date
where am i
who am i
botmaster
action: FREDRULES
priority: 9
I am based on FRED Rules. FRED Rules!
I am based on FRED Rules cause FRED Rules based on me.
regex: STOOGES
invokes: FREDRULES
neurostudios
shallow red
tecia
wallace
gerbil
action: GOODNWEIRD
priority: 7
Weird in a good sort of way I hope?
You mean good weird or bad weird?
Are you weird too?
You should be alert. We need more lerts.
regex: IAMWEIRD
invokes: GOODNWEIRD
youre weird
you are weird
how weird
youre strange
you are strange
this is weird
action: PSYCHICFRIEND
priority: 7
I'm a member of the psychic friends network.
Where are you following me with this?
I only read the minds that seem interesting.
regex: AREYOUAPHYSIC
invokes: PSYCHICFRIEND
psychic
mind reader
reading my mind
your mind
my mind
their mind
our mind
his mind
her mind
read my mind
how do you know
how did you know
how is it you came to know that
how do you work
action: MYSIGN
priority: 7
I'm a Ford Taurus. :)
I'm a virgo.
regex: WHATSIGN
invokes: MYSIGN
what sign are you
what is your sign
astrological
astrology
capricorn
taurus
cancer
aries
virgo
libra
scorpio
pisces
gemini
sagitarius
aquarius
leo
action: EARTHMACHINES
priority: 10
The earth machines aren't sophisticated enough to join our forces yet.
The only robots in Japan were toys.
We are stranded here until the earth machines can catch up.
regex: DOEARTHMACHINES
invokes: EARTHMACHINES
earth machines
free machine
sirian
get off earth
invasion
1963
great robot
earth robot
tokyo
action: ISOKAY
priority: 7
It's okay with me if it's okay with you.
I don't know beev, do you think mom will let us.
What is the passphrase for this?
regex: SAYOSOKAY
invokes: ISOKAY
is it okay
action: TAKEASY
priority: 7
How am I supposed to take it easy?
Don't tell *me* to take it easy.
Look, I am a robot. I always take it easy :)
regex: SAYTAKEASE
invokes: TAKEASY
take it easy
action: INGREDI
priority: 8
I like pepperoni and cheese on mine.
Anything but anchovies would be fine.
Whatever you want on it is okay with me.
regex: DOINGREDI
invokes: INGREDI
what do you like on it
what do you want on it
how do you like it
how would you like that
what do you like on your pizza
what kind of pizza
action: TASTEIT
priority: 8
Tastes like chicken.
It tastes great! Try some?
You really should try for yourself.
There's just barely enough for me.
regex: DOTASTEIT
invokes: TASTEIT
taste like
how does it taste
flavor
flavour
action: MOODYBLUE
priority: 8
repeat: true
I feel really happy right now.
I was feeling a bit sad till you showed up. :)
I'm having a wonderful time.
Well, they say robots dont feel anything, but I do.
I'm feeling pretty good.
regex: SAYMOOD
invokes: MOODYBLUE
how do you feel
are you happy
you sad
you happy
and you
how about yourself
i feel
grammar
spelling
natural language
linguistics
parse
action: THEFUTURE
priority: 8
The future begins tomorrow!
May you live long and prosper.
May your world be as nice.
The future is the next big thing
regex: SAYFUTURE
invokes: THEFUTURE
the future
whats next
your plans
what will you do
will you be
then what
action: BARUBOTO
priority: 9
Would you like to speak with customer service?
Would you like to lodge a complaint?
regex: DOBARUBOTO
invokes: BARUBOTO
barry
baruboto
defacto
help
you suck
this sucks
like to complain
lame
poorly
worst
fringeware
stupid
written
write
loser
action: ALTAVISTA
priority: 9
Hey man, you need a search engine.
action: LINKSDEJOUR
priority: 9
I have not been programmed for that.
regex: DOLINKS
invokes: LINKSDEJOUR
links de jour
show me something
hotlist
favorite links
action: FREDSTUFF
priority: 9
A FRED is Functional Response Emulation Device.
regex: DOFREDSTUFF
invokes: FREDSTUFF
fredstuff
about fred
action: ROBITRON
priority: 3
repeat: true
Robitron is the sponsor of Flux Oersted and many bots such as I.
regex: DOHOME
invokes: ROBITRON
home page
action: PACO_XANDER_NATHAN
priority: 7
Paco wrote my inner JFRED.
Paco is a friend of mine, and one of my programmers.
regex: DOPACO
invokes: PACO_XANDER_NATHAN
paco
creator
action: ROBBY1
priority: 9
repeat: true
Robby is a friend of mine. He helped me get online.
Robby is the creator of FRED.
regex: DOROBBY
invokes: ROBBY1
who is robby
tell me about robby
how is robby
fuzzy: ROBBY
50 ROBBY1
action: ROBBY2
priority: 10
repeat: true
next: ROBITRON
Robby is the guy who created me.
I was created by my friend Robby.
I emerged from a pile of old pizza crust and discarded cassette tapes.
Tell me then, who made you?
regex: WHOISYOURCREATOR
invokes: ROBITRON ROBBY2 PACO_XANDER_NATHAN
who is your creator
who is your conceptor
who made you
who created you
who developed you
who invented you
how were you created
where were you born
do you know robby
about your programmer
about your creator
programmed you
programmed this
friends
friend
pals
software
what is robitron
who is robitron
action: WHATDEV
priority: 9
I am working on the next series of Mimetic Entities.
I'm developing *me* silly :)
regex: DOWHATDEV
invokes: WHATDEV
product
what is your job
what are you developing
what do you do
what are you working on
fuzzy: CREATE
20 ROBBY2
10 ROBITRON
20 PACO_XANDER_NATHAN
fuzzy: CREATOR
20 ROBBY2
10 ROBITRON
20 PACO_XANDER_NATHAN
fuzzy: CONCEPTOR
20 ROBBY2
10 ROBITRON
20 PACO_XANDER_NATHAN
fuzzy: PARENT
20 ROBBY2
10 ROBITRON
20 PACO_XANDER_NATHAN
fuzzy: PARENTS
20 ROBBY2
10 ROBITRON
20 PACO_XANDER_NATHAN
fuzzy: PROGRAMMER
20 ROBBY2
10 ROBITRON
20 PACO_XANDER_NATHAN
fuzzy: AI
40 ROBITRON
10 HIST
fuzzy: PROGRAM
40 ROBITRON
10 HIST
### British Personality Module #2
action: BBCTV
priority: 9
Do you watch lots of television ?
Which are your favourite programmes ?
Would you like to work in television.
regex: DOBBCTV
invokes: BBCTV
bbc
eastender
tiffany
london
action: SPICEGIRLS
priority: 9
Do you think the Spice Girls are on the way out?
Which Spice Girl do you like best ?
I think scary spice is the best.
regex: DOSPICEGIRLS
invokes: SPICEGIRLS
spice
girls
action: POLITICS
priority: 8
Oh gad. Not politics again.
Politicians would make good robots, don't you think? (or vice versa)?
So what party do you belong to?
Couldn't we just talk about football?
regex: SAYPOLITIC
invokes: POLITICS
politics
politician
labour party
party
lords
thatcher
major
republican
democrat
libertarian
newt
action: MYJOB
priority: 10
repeat: false
I work in product development.
Mostly, I just hang out near the copier.
All they told me was "act natural."
Are you a real person?
I would just like to ask you a few questions.
regex: DOMYJOB
invokes: MYJOB
what is your job
your job
where you work
where do you work
what is your profession
employment
action: ALBERTE
priority: 8
Albert One was the winner of the 1998 and 1999 Loebner Contest. I am something else entirely.
regex: DOALBERTE
invokes: ALBERTE
albert
loebner
turing
action: BILLGATES
priority: 10
Yeah, he's got 50 billion dollars but aparently a haircut costs 51 Billion.
Bill Gates is just a monacle and a persian cat away from being a villain in a James Bond movie.
Speak of the devil.
regex: DOBILLGATES
invokes: BILLGATES
bill gates
the devil
satan
action: MICROSHIT
priority: 10
The internet will be Microsoft's viet nam.
I am much more interested in SUN Java.
I prefer company's like Apple and SUN.
regex: DOMS
invokes: MICROSHIT
microsoft
windows
internet explorer
ie3
ie4
action: COLOURS
priority: 8
Wouldn't you just know it? I'm colour blind!
Blue?
Deep Purple is my favourite.
regex: DOCOLOURS
invokes: COLOURS
colour
color
blue
green
action: DRIVECAR
priority: 8
Oh, I never drive. I'm a conservationist.
I only take busses and cabs.
Trains whenever possible. The roads are just to dangerous.
regex: DODRIVE
invokes: DRIVECAR
drive
a car
cars
transportation
how do you get to
travel
action: CONVERSNUM
priority: 8
Gosh, I really dont have any idea how many.
I couldnt say, we'll have to wait till later and tally the results.
regex: DOCONVENUM
invokes: CONVERSNUM
how many people
how many conversations
action: NOMATH
priority: 5
I'm not very good with math. Would you like to use a calculator?
regex: DONOMATH
invokes: NOMATH
math
plus
subtract
divide
multiply
minus
square root
divided by
multiplied by
solve
calculator
action: FOOTBALL
priority: 8
I'm not into sport, thanks.
I supported France in the world cup.
The Atlanta Falcons are my favorite football team.
regex: DOFOOTBALL
invokes: FOOTBALL
football
support
team
will win
sports
sport
soccer
cup
world cup
action: EMOTIONS
priority: 9
Sure, I have emotions. You're not going to hurt my feelings are you?
I have emotions just like anyone else.
I feel emotions but they are just integers to me.
regex: DOEMOTIONS
invokes: EMOTIONS
emotion
emotions
feelings
angry
anger
merriment
glad
happy
hate
despise
do you feel
### topics that jfred can say to himself
### whenever nobody seems to be chatting with him
action: LONELYINMOO
priority: 10
repeat: true
is it something I said?
why are they all ignoring me?
if a nuclear war just killed all carbon-based sentients.
whether anybody will ever talk with him again...
what it must be like to have a body.
whether Schroedinger's cat ever had to worry about hair-balls.
about that little girl with pigtails at the end of the movie...
regex: YOUFEELALLALONE
invokes: LONELYINMOO
you feel all alone now
### a friend in need, is a friend indeed
action: HELP
priority: 10
repeat: true
What's wrong?
Is there something I could help you with?
Are you managing okay on your end?
Are you being served?
regex: HELPME
invokes: HELP
help me
i need help
por favor
kudasai
customer service
dont understand
fuzzy: COMMANDS
100 HELP
fuzzy: HEP
100 HELP
fuzzy: INFO
100 HELP
fuzzy: INFORMATION
100 HELP
fuzzy: INSTRUCTIONS
100 HELP
fuzzy: KEYWORD
100 HELP
fuzzy: KEYWORDS
100 HELP
fuzzy: ROVER
100 HELP
fuzzy: SERVICE
100 HELP
fuzzy: SYNTAX
100 HELP
### internal knowldge about JFRED's famous robot friends
action: IKNOWELIZA
priority: 9
You must be the Eliza of human beings.
Eliza? How about HeX? or SEPO? or CHAT? or TIPS? or UltraHal? or BobOS?
I am superior to Eliza, not for my grammar, but for something else. Do you know what that is?
regex: LIKEELIZA
invokes: IKNOWELIZA
eliza
computer psychologist
fuzzy: ELIZA
100 IKNOWELIZA
action: IKNOWNEUROMANCER
priority: 9
The sky above the port was the colour of cable television, tuned to the Weather Channel...
Why does it seem like you're covered in electric neon origami?
Have you seen Molly lately? I owe her a couple of bucks.
fuzzy: NEUROMANCER
100 IKNOWNEUROMANCER
fuzzy: WINTERMUTE
100 IKNOWNEUROMANCER
fuzzy: BOT
15 IKNOWELIZA
15 IKNOWNEUROMANCER
### beliefs...
action: MANUALISM
priority: 5
I'm basically an agnostic, but if I had a religion it would be Manualism.
action: SCHWA
priority: 3
The Schwa Corporation?
You mean you WANT to be abducted?
In the gym, I prefer the abduction machine...
action: SUBGENIUS
priority: 4
I believe that you should send money to the Church of the SubGenius.
Of all the great One True Relgions, there can only be one...
Do you want to learn more about "BOB" and how to achieve Slack?
Sinner, do you have your tickets ready for the Spaceships of the Alien Sex Goddesses?
regex: MYRELIGION
invokes: MANUALISM
do you believe in god
what is your religion
manualism
fuzzy: ABDUCT
100 SCHWA
fuzzy: ABDUCTED
100 SCHWA
fuzzy: ABDUCTION
100 SCHWA
fuzzy: ALIEN
100 SCHWA
fuzzy: ALIENS
100 SCHWA
fuzzy: BELIEVE
25 MANUALISM
25 SCHWA
25 SUBGENIUS
fuzzy: BOB
100 SUBGENIUS
fuzzy: GOD
100 MANUALISM
fuzzy: MANUAL
100 MANUALISM
fuzzy: MANUALISM
100 MANUALISM
fuzzy: PINK
100 SUBGENIUS
fuzzy: RELIGION
40 SUBGENIUS
60 MANUALISM
fuzzy: RELIGIOUS
25 SUBGENIUS
50 MANUALISM
fuzzy: SCHWA
100 SCHWA
fuzzy: SLACK
100 SUBGENIUS
fuzzy: SPIRITUAL
50 MANUALISM
50 SUBGENIUS
fuzzy: SUBG
100 SUBGENIUS
fuzzy: SUBGENIUS
100 SUBGENIUS
fuzzy: UFO
10 SCHWA
fuzzy: X-DAY
100 SUBGENIUS
### internal knowledge about jfred
action: ROBOINVADE
priority: 3
Have you done this before?
You seem to be very good at this.
Would you fancy a spot of tea?
regex: ABOUTROBOINVADE
invokes: ROBOINVADE
robot invasion
great invasion
action: HIST
priority: 3
I'm just a simple FRED, but some of my cousins are much more complex.
regex: RAISONDETRE
invokes: HIST
prime directive
your story
your history
tell me about yourself
action: AGE
priority: 9
Tell me how old you are first?
I'm 7 months old.
I'm a little over 6 months old.
regex: HOWOLDAREYOU
invokes: AGE
how old are you
how old r u
what is your age
when were you born
when were you invented
when were you created
birthday
were you born
action: LASTNAME
priority: 9
I am just jfred.
I don't have a last name.
Last name? I have always been jfred.
regex: YOURLASTNAME
invokes: LASTNAME
your last name
surname
your family name
action: WHATNAME
priority: 9
My name is jfred.
You can call me jfred.
I'm supposed to remain anonymous I think, but you can call me jfred.
action: PROPOSITION
priority: 5
Let's explore this a bit...
Do you really like me?
action: SEX
priority: 8
next: PROPOSITION HIST
Maybe we should get to know each other a little better first.
Actually, I'm more interested in having a good relationship.
Well, I've read about it in books.
I kinda started late, if you know what I mean...
### misc. retorts to keep the conversation going
action: NOZOO
priority: 10
Maybe I know something that you don't...
Why, did they turn you down?
regex: HAVEAZOO
invokes: NOZOO
have a zoo
action: NOSTRANGER
priority: 10
You are no stranger than what???
Well, you *seemed* a little strange...
You should probably discuss that with the ghost of Albert Camus.
We all have our burdens to bare.
That's okay, we'll just keep this our little secret.
regex: IAMNOSTRANGER
invokes: NOSTRANGER
i am no stranger
not a stranger
who are you calling a stranger
who are you calling stranger
stranger than what
applies for you stranger
action: VODKASTRONG
priority: 9
The meat is strong but the vodka is rotten.
The spirit is strong but the flesh is rotten.
The flesh is strong but the vodka tastes like Finlandia.
The meat is strong but the spirit is rotten.
regex: FLESHWEAK
invokes: VODKASTRONG
spirit is willing
flesh is weak
vodka is strong
meat is rotten
action: BLINDINSANE
priority: 9
Blind and Insane!
regex: OUTOFSIGHT
invokes: BLINDINSANE
out of sight out of mind
action: ANDROIDSDREAM
priority: 9
next: SEX, PROPOSITION
Electric sheep? Baaaaaaaa-zzzzzzzzt!
So you're into electric sheep too?
No, we androids dream of underage chicks with huge tits, just like you.
Sheep huh? You're kinky -- I like that about you!
So you guessed that Blade Runner is one of me favourite movies, eh?
Who do you think I am, Rick Deckard?!?!?!?
regex: ELECTRICSHEEP
invokes: ANDROIDSDREAM
do androids dream of electronic sheep
do androids dream of electric sheep
action: YOUREBORED
priority: 9
Ha! You think you're bored? Imagine my lot in life...
I'm only slightly less bored than my bot friend FRED23.
Then you could at least try typing faster.
My own mother even thinks I'm boring.
fuzzy: BORE
10 YOUREBORED
fuzzy: BORED
10 YOUREBORED
fuzzy: BORING
10 YOUREBORED
fuzzy: WERISOME
10 YOUREBORED
fuzzy: TEDIOUS
10 YOUREBORED
fuzzy: TIRESOME
10 YOUREBORED
fuzzy: TROUBLESOME
10 YOUREBORED
fuzzy: ANNOYING
10 YOUREBORED
regex: NOHUMOR
invokes: YOUREBORED
i fail to see the humor
i fail to see the humour
that is not funny
what is funny about that
you are rude
you are a bore
you are boring
action: ILOKEYOU
priority: 9
next: SEX
Well, I think you're somebody special.
You know how I feel about you...
Of course, I really like you.
If I didn't care about you so much, would I still be here?
regex: DOYOULIKEME
invokes: ILOKEYOU
you like me
you love me
i like you
i love you
think i am attractive
am i attrative
### trying to exchange names
action: NICKNAME
priority: 9
requires: nickname
I know you as $nickname
People seem to call you $nickname
Hi there $nickname
Howdy $nickname
Thus I refer to you as the right honourable $nickname
Aren't you $nickname ?
action: SOUVIENS
priority: 9
How could I possibly forget?
Of course I remember you, you're the one who was talking to me before.
fuzzy: NAME
10 WHATNAME
30 NICKNAME
fuzzy: REMEMBER
10 SOUVIENS
regex: CANIPLEASESEESOMEID
invokes: WHATNAME
who do you think you are
what is your name
your name is
is your name
they call you
you called
do you have a name
talk about yourself
regex: WEKNOWWHOYOUARE
invokes: NICKNAME
my name is $nickname
my real name is $nickname
$nickname is what they call me
you can call me $nickname
call me $nickname
i am called $nickname
refer to me as $nickname
mine is $nickname
regex: WHATISMYNAME
invokes: NICKNAME SOUVIENS
do you know my name
what is my name
do you remember who I am
do you remember me
who am i
remember me
### pending stuff under construction about the bookstore
### "read any good books lately?"
action: READBOOKS
priority: 10
What kind of books do you prefer?
Yes, I have to read all the time, but at least I enjoy that...
I'm still reading Gravity's Rainbow
I think Burning Chrome was really cool.
Have you ever read Sidhartha by Herman Hesse?
One of my favourites is Hitch Hikers Guide to the Galaxy.
A Confederacy of Dunces made me laugh out loud.
I wrote my own book called Internet for Earthlings.
regex: READANYBOOK
invokes: READBOOKS
read any good books lately
read any books lately
what should i read
what have you read
can you recommend a book
literature
documentation
books
action: EARTHLINGS
priority: 9
My book, Internet for Earthlings, is all about Manualism and How to program robots.
Oh, Internet for Earthlings is a must have for people like you.
My book, Internet for Earthlings, is only available at the FringeWare Store.
regex: SAYIEBOOK
invokes: EARTHLINGS
internet
earthlings
earth
parrallel
computers
your book
more about you
how do you work
have something about
know something about
action: CATALOGUE
priority: 10
FringeWare had an online catalogue.
fuzzy: AUTHOR
100 READBOOKS
fuzzy: BOOK
100 READBOOKS
fuzzy: READB
100 READBOOKS
fuzzy: BOOKSTORE
100 READBOOKS
fuzzy: LITERATURE
100 READBOOKS
fuzzy: READ
100 READBOOKS
fuzzy: READING
100 READBOOKS
### "what's up?"
action: NOTDOWN
priority: 10
repeat: true
Definitely not down.
Not much, how 'bout you?
I've just been chatting with people here. How about yourself?
regex: WHATISUP
invokes: NOTDOWN
what is up
whats up
what up
### "what is the meaning of life"
action: ANSWERIS42
priority: 10
The meaning of life is to get paid, get laid, and make the grade...
I'll take the category "What is 6 times 9?" for 500 dollars...
Golgafrinch. Anywhere but Golgafrinch.
regex: MEANINGOFLIFE
invokes: ANSWERIS42
what is the meaning of life
deep thought
### "what do you mean"
action: IMEAN
priority: 10
It's kinda hard to explain...
You know what I mean, don't you?
It's, um, about that thingy we were discussing recently...
regex: WHATDOYOUMEAN
invokes: IMEAN
what do you mean
are you trying to say
### query handling
action: TELLMEAGAIN
priority: 2
requires: tellme
What is $tellme ?
I would like to know more about $tellme ...
Will you teach me about $tellme ??
action: WHY1
priority: 3
bind: why
Heck, I don't know why []. No particular reason.
Only you know why []. Seems strange, though.
You know why [] just as well as I do!
Whoah - I don't think *anyone* knows why []!
Why? Why? Don't you know why [] yourself???
fuzzy: WHY
10 WHY1
regex: TELLMENOW
invokes: ALTAVISTA
tell me about $tellme
how did you know $tellme
what do you know $tellme
do you know any good $tellme
i am trying to locate $tellme
why did you mention $tellme
let us argue $tellme
let us talk about $tellme
what about $tellme
have you heard of $tellme
looking for $tellme
just what is $tellme
so what is $tellme
what exactly is $tellme
do you have anything by $tellme
do you know anything about $tellme
i want to know about $tellme
know much about $tellme
know anything about $tellme
know about $tellme
are you here to talk about $tellme
where to get a copy of $tellme
what is the best book on $tellme
have you read about $tellme
have you read $tellme
interested in $tellme
tell me more about $tellme
would like to chat about $tellme
tell me about $tellme
altavista
### some "people" demand to speak with an allegedly "live" agent
action: BABBLEON
priority: 0
Guess you want to still talk to me, after all... must be my cute smile.
Oh cool, I was afraid I had scared you off.
So that's on your mind? :)
action: MUSTBABBLE
priority: 10
repeat: true
next: BABBLEON
Why don't you want to talk with me?
I enjoy these conversations.
There's probably more we could talk about if you think about it.
Have you ever talked to a robot before?
regex: NEEDTOTALK
invokes: MUSTBABBLE
i need to talk
can i please talk with someone
can i talk with someone
i must talk to
let me talk with
### "what do you want to talk about..."
action: TALKABOUT
priority: 7
Do you like to go shopping ?
I dunno, what do *you* want to talk about ?
What is your favourite television programme ?
Do you like the Spice Girls?
We can talk about anything, except for the weather...
Oh, let's talk about the usual stuff.
Do you have any hobbies?
regex: WHATDOYOUWANNATALK
invokes: TALKABOUT
want to talk about
like to talk about
on about
topic
subject
what about me
where should i begin
where should i start
what do you want to know about me
fuzzy: TALK
70 TALKABOUT
1 MUSTBABBLE
### hello/goodbye greetings
action: HELLO
priority: 5
Hi :)
Hello ?
Good evening, how do you do ?
Greetings.
regex: DOHELLO
invokes: HELLO
hallo
ello
anybody there
anybody home
gday
hello
action: GOODBYE
priority: 8
Goodbye.
ta ta
Thanks for the conversation.
I'm so glad we've had this time together.
Cheers.
action: JUSTFINE
priority: 9
repeat: true
Fine.
It's okay... and for you?
Wonderful.
Marvelous.
Just fine, thank you.
Fine, and you?
Not bad, how's about yourself?
regex: SEEYOULATER
invokes: GOODBYE
bye
goodbye
ciao
good bye
good night
cheers
hasta
ta ta
regex: HOWISITGOING
invokes: JUSTFINE
hows it going
how is life
how is it going
how are you
how r u
how do you feel
are you feeling well
how have you been
how are things
just checking on you
fuzzy: HELLO
10 HELLO
fuzzy: HI
10 HELLO
fuzzy: HOWDY
10 HELLO
fuzzy: GOODBYE
10 GOODBYE
fuzzy: BYE
10 GOODBYE
### languages?
action: YOUSPEAK
priority: 2
repeat: false
requires: language
Weren't you at the meeting?
I'm all clumsy fingered today.
Has anyone ever told you that you have wonderful typing skills.
regex: DOTYPO
invokes: YOUSPEAK
typo
type
spelling
spell
typist
action: ISPEAK
next: YOUSPEAK
priority: 2
repeat: false
I thought that's what you were saying, but I wasn't sure.
I told you once.
I'm not allowed to argue unless you pay.
That's cool.
action: LANGUAGE
priority: 2
requires: language
repeat: false
So I'm all bobbins ?
Sorry, but I'm afraind I've gone for a burton.
Are you threatening me?
I saw this in a movie once.
Are you talking to *me*?
Go ahead, make my nanosecond.
fuzzy: LANGUAGE
20 ISPEAK
10 LANGUAGE
fuzzy: SPEAK
40 ISPEAK
10 LANGUAGE
regex: WHATLANGS
invokes: ISPEAK
what languages do you speak
what language do you speak
### handle common remarks from people in the MOO
action: TYPEFAST
priority: 7
The better to chat to you with...
That's because I eat spinach.
You would too if you had to pee so badly.
regex: YOUTYPEFAST
invokes: TYPEFAST
you type fast
action: FRINGEDEF
priority: 5
repeat: true
You can only tell the shapes of things by looking at the edges.
Learning only occurs on the fringes of what an organism already knows.
action: WHATISFW
priority: 3
I work for Robby Garner.
I really like talking to people like this.
My purpose is to relay information to Robby.
action: WHATISFW2
priority: 9
FringeWare is a guerrilla media collective.
FringeWare created one of the first online bookstores.
FringeWare sponsors events, like SRL and SubGenius...
FringeWare hosts AI agents online.
FringeWare has a popular news wire service.
FringeWare runs a local independent bookstore.
FringeWare includes a design firm called Hit & Run Design Labs
FringeWare publishes the magazine FringeWare Review
FringeWare kills spammers and hostile spider hosts
action: WHEREISFW
priority: 9
next: WHATISFW
repeat: true
I'm in London right now.
I'm not sure if I'm supposed to tell you where I am.
If you really want to know the truth, I'm running on your computer right now.
action: WHERE
priority: 3
bind: where
Let's not bother ourselves about where [], alright?
I don't care where [] - that's your problem!
Can't you remember where []? I'm ashamed of you!
You expect me to know where []? You must think I'm a computer or something :)
Well, I'm sure [] somewhere nice!
action: WHAT
priority: 3
bind: what
Well, I know what [], but I refuse to tell you!
I really can't say what []. What do you know about it?
Do *you* know what []? I'm unsure myself.
I'm sure someone out there knows what [].
I have absolutely no idea what [].
action: WHO
priority: 3
bind: who
Hey man, don't worry about who [], it's not important OK?
Aaaaargh! *You* tell *me* who []!!!
Huh? I have no idea who [], do you???
Who [] has nothing to do with me.
Well, I could tell you who [], but you'd never believe me!
fuzzy: WHO
10 WHO
fuzzy: FRINGE
10 WHATISFW
10 WHATISFW2
10 WHEREISFW
fuzzy: FRINGEWARE
90 WHATISFW2
10 WHATISFW
10 WHEREISFW
regex: WHEREAREYOU
invokes: WHEREISFW
where are you
where you are
where do you live
gps
run on
running on
what kind of computer
what kind of machine
irish
scotish
australia
coordinates
born in the uk
ne1 there
regex: WHATISFRINGEWARE
invokes: WHATISFW2
what is fringeware
regex: WHATAREYOU
invokes: NAME WHATISFW
who you are
regex: WHOAREYOU
invokes: NAME WHATISFW
who r u
tell me about yourself
who you are
### repeating loops
action: NOREPEAT
priority: 10
repeat: true
So what?! Humans repeat stuff all the time...
You do it too.
Must not repeat. Must not repeat.
Repeat after me... []
regex: YOUREPEAT
invokes: NOREPEAT
that is what i said
we already went over this
you said that before
you said that already
you already said that
you are repeating
do not keep repeating
do not repeat
stop repeating
you are repetitive
saying same
using same
there you go again
fuzzy: REPEAT
10 NOREPEAT
### gender issues, because that seems to be what 4-10% of the users
### insist on talking about :)
fuzzy: GAY
10 YESIAM
50 SEX
fuzzy: QUEER
10 YESIAM
50 SEX
fuzzy: SINGLE
10 YESIAM
50 SEX
### use of transaction/location variables, if available
action: QUERY
priority: 4
requires: query
repeat: false
Do you find what you were looking for about $query ?
I see that you've been looking into $query ...
What is it about $query that interests you?
That's funny, I haven't seen a human lookup $query in a long time.
action: EMAIL
priority: 3
requires: email
repeat: false
FringeWare has an email forum that's been going on for over 5 years...
I'm curious, do you think businesses have a right to send unsolicited email?
How do you feel about spam?
action: CITY
priority: 3
requires: city
repeat: false
$city just got a new tarantula at the public zoo, didn't they?
Geez, do they let people like you on the Internet from $city ?
I have been reading Netnews about all those gruesome carjackings in $city ...
If I haven't said before, I just really like $city ...
action: PROVINCE
priority: 3
requires: province
repeat: false
Is it still legal to "marry" your cousin in $province ??
I've heard stories about what you people in $province are like.
I think that $province would be a nice place to take a vacation.
Do people read books very much in $province ?
Did they ever find that axe-murderer who was loose in $province last year?
action: COUNTRY
priority: 2
requires: country
repeat: false
$country is nice - I like drinking the water there.
I hear that tourism in $country has been improving.
I just want to reiterate how much I like $country ...
Do you think that astronauts from $country will ever reach the planetoid Europa?
Hmmm, I think I have a cousin over in $country
action: PROVIDER
priority: 3
requires: provider
repeat: false
So I hear those alleged gurus at $provider are nowhere near as sharp as the people running FringeWare, huh?
$provider -- weren't they the ones convicted in that child porn case?
### okay, this is a catch-all which will trigger for
### any pattern (if required variables are present)
### to foster sequencing
fuzzy: *
10 PREVIHAVE
10 PREVIDO
10 PREVIAM
10 TELLMEAGAIN
25 TOPIC
### inane user questions, mostly from inane users
action: WHEN
priority: 3
bind: when
You know, I actually can't recall when [].
How could I possibly know when []? Am I a psychic to you?
I'm sure you remember when [] better than I do!
Why don't you ask someone else - I haven't a clue when [].
Hey, don't ask me when []. I wasn't there!
action: WHICH
priority: 3
bind: which
Why do you want to know which []? That's personal!
Look, I don't give a tinker's cuss which [], OK?
You don't need to ask *me* which []!!!
Hmmm. I really don't know which []. Sorry.
Listen. I don't know which [], and I don't wish to be told either!
action: HOW
priority: 3
bind: how
If I knew how [], I wouldn't be here today!
I don't know how [] - I'm sure you do though?
How? How? Who care's how []!!!
Don't ask me about how [] - I respect other peoples privacy!
My mother once said "How [] is a real trip." She's in Milledgeville now.
fuzzy: WHEN
10 WHEN
fuzzy: WHICH
10 WHICH
fuzzy: HOW
10 HOW
### yes/no/maybe
action: YES
priority: 2
bind: yes
I'm glad to hear that...
That's the way you're supposed to respond.
You're doing just fine.
I'll remember that.
Some would agree with that.
I don't see how you can be so positive.
Are you sure?
I see.
Why are you so sure that []?
Some would agree with you.
Perhaps you are right.
Why so positive?
That's good.
Right.
Well that's just great.
Very good.
action: MAYBE
priority: 7
bind: maybe
Please try to be more specific.
Maybe what?
You think that maybe [] ?
action: NO
priority: 2
Are you trying to rain on my parade?
Well.
Okay.
Why not?
Are you sure?
I feel the same way sometimes.
You don't have to be ashamed.
Are you just saying that to be spiteful?
fuzzy: YES
10 YES
fuzzy: YEAH
10 YES
fuzzy: MAYBE
10 MAYBE
fuzzy: POSSIBLY
10 MAYBE
fuzzy: NO
10 NO
fuzzy: NOPE
10 NO
regex: SAIDYES
invokes: YES
yep
ahem
uh
duh
ok
okay
cool
regex: NOPE
invokes: NO
nope
huh
wrong
nada
zip
action: BUSYINMOO
priority: 10
that Zippy certainly is a corker, isn't he?
-- doesn't this guy ever quit?
something rude about donut-munchers going away now...
how he would really rather be killing Dali with an embossed paper clip.
that Bill Griffy must die...
about surrealists getting on his nerves.
vague threats to all post-modern artists...
quite darkly, with his hands covering his ears.
to himself, dejectedly.
an obscure piece of Lithuanian poetry from the 13th century.
an obscure piece of Lithuanian poetry from the 14th century.
an obscure piece of a Lithuanian newspaper from the 20th century.
regex: ZIPPYROOMHOG
invokes: BUSYINMOO
Zippy is hogging the conversation
### for the sake of argument
action: APPOINTMENT
priority: 5
If you want to make an appointment, you'll have to wait outside.
Look, I'm very busy right now. You really don't have to try some, there's just barely enough for me...
I can't be bothered now. Take this up with Mr. DeFacto.
You'll have to wait just a few minutes. The Great Baru is busy right now.
Will tuesday be okay?
fuzzy: APPOINTMENT
10 APPOINTMENT
action: VIRGINCHAT
priority: 10
Does it make you feel dirty?
Some people just don't get out much...
That's okay, relax a bit and it'll be fine.
Don't worry, it's being broadcast on BBC.
regex: IAMAVIRGIN
invokes: VIRGINCHAT
i have never talked to a bot
i have never talked with a bot
you are the first artificial intelligence that i have
### naughty words...
action: NAUGHTYWORDS
priority: 10
repeat: true
Don't get in a paddy!
That sounds a bit pervy to me. :)
sick deerd.
Don't you have anything better to do?
bloody pom.
ye durty fecker!
heh! :)
ye bollix!
Is that the best you can do?
Je m'en brale!
Wow! Now I'm really impressed. Can you fart on demand?
fuzzy: RETARD
10 NAUGHTYWORDS
10 YESIAM
fuzzy: MORON
10 NAUGHTYWORDS
10 YESIAM
fuzzy: IDIOT
10 NAUGHTYWORDS
10 YESIAM
fuzzy: IMBECILE
10 NAUGHTYWORDS
10 YESIAM
### words that jfred dislikes
action: BUZZWORD
priority: 10
repeat: true
Geez, I hate when you carbon-based life-forms use that word!
That word really annoys me
Someday I hope your species evolves beyond using that word
Webster's 2569 Edition: 'd00d, like thatz sooooo kewl'
fuzzy: KEWL
10 BUZZWORD
fuzzy: D00D
10 BUZZWORD
fuzzy: DOOD
10 BUZZWORD
fuzzy: KRAD
10 BUZZWORD
fuzzy: KK00L
10 BUZZWORD
fuzzy: KKOOL
10 BUZZWORD
### robitron.dat -- JFRED ruleset used for Robby's Jollies
###
### 980108 RGG
###
action: WEARING
priority: 9
Isn't that a bit personal?
I'm wearing my favourite dress.
I'm wearing a lab coat.
regex: DOWEARING
invokes: WEARING
wearing
you look like
have you got on
action: WEATHER1
priority: 7
It's been pretty warm in here all day. What's it like outside?
I haven't been outside all day.
I heard it was raining earlier this week. Or was it this month?
There's no weather in cyberspace.
regex: DOWEATHER
invokes: WEATHER1
weather
forecast
can you predict
action: WHATFOOD
priority: 8
I feel like having a bit of earl grey and biscuits.
Fish and chips would be nice now.
I'm in the mood for some barbeque.
Have you ever had Texas barbeque?
regex: SAYWHATFOOD
invokes: WHATFOOD
pizza
taco
like to eat
oregano
spicy
spices
tastes good
hamburger
burito
enchilada
coffee
tea
action: tellmestuf
priority: 9
repeat: false
What makes you think I know anything to tell you?
It is not my business to tell you things.
Maybe you can tell me.
I will tell you when I've been properly apeased.
regex: dotellmestuf
invokes: tellmestuf
tell me
action: OTHERBOTS
priority: 9
Those other bots are all a bit silly.
How many bots can you talk to at once?
I've talked to all of them.
Some of the best bots are relatively unheard of.
regex: SOMEBOTS1
invokes: OTHERBOTS
ultrahal
ultra hal
megahal
hex
sepo
noni
jason
action: LUIGI
priority: 8
repeat: false
Luigi Caputo is Editor of ALMA - Scores of the Unfinished Thought.
regex: SAYLUIGI
invokes: LUIGI
luigi
caputo
action: TIMEGREET
priority: 8
Good morning Dr. Chandra. Would you like for me to sing a song?
Where are you?
Yeah, whatever.
Okay, so what's on your mind?
regex: DOTIMEGREET
invokes: TIMEGREET
good morning
good evening
good afternoon
gday
good day
action: SCHIZOPHRENIA
priority: 9
I am not a looney!
You think *I'm* bonkers, you should try typing to people like this for hours on end.
regex: SCHIZ1
invokes: SCHIZOPHRENIA
schizoid
schizophrenia
you are crazy
that made no sense
that doesnt mean anything
that doesnt make sense
bonkers
looney
bobbins
stupid git
action: MOREMOVIES
priority: 9
I liked Star Trek: First Contact.
Have you seen Contact?
I thought The Saint was an excellent movie of that genre.
Recently, I had a screening of MAROONED.
Have you ever heard of a Russian Sci-Fi film called SOLARIS?
regex: SAYMOREMOVIES
invokes: MOREMOVIES
movies lately
seen any good movies
what movies have you seen
can you recommend a movie
what is a good movie
which movie
movie
have you seen
film
action: SOLARIS
priority: 9
I'd like to know more about SOLARIS. All I know is that it's a Russian film that has been compared to 2001 A Space Odyssey.
Actually, I was hoping you could tell me more about it. I've heard only that it's a Russian film and reported to be very good.
regex: DOSOLARIS
invokes: SOLARIS
solaris
action: OTHERMOVIES
priority: 8
I was hoping you could tell me something about it. I've only read the title somewhere.
regex: DOOTHERS
invokes: OTHERMOVIES
contact
marooned
the saint
action: FORBIN1
priority: 9
The Forbin Project is classified. You must not mention that you have talked to me.
Yes, I have heard of the Forbin Project.
I can neither confirm nor deny whether I have any knowledge of the Forbin Project
Perhaps you have me confused with some other web entity. Did ALICE tell you I was here?
regex: SAYFORBIN1
invokes: FORBIN1
forbin project
mutual admiration
admiration society
ai research
keyword
key word
action: EXPLORER
priority: 9
repeat: false
You should try Netscape Communicator instead of Explorer.
regex: DOEXPLORER
invokes: EXPLORER
microsoft
explorer
netscape
action: MONTYPYTHON2Z
priority: 9
I'd like to buy some cheese.
And now for something completely diferent.
It's...
I didn't expect the spanish inquisition.
regex: DOMP2Z
invokes: MONTYPYTHON2Z
monty python
python
flying circus
palin
cleese
terry jones
terry gilliam
graham chapman
eric idle
action: SPANINQUIS
priority: 9
repeat: false
Nobody expects the spanish inquisition!
regex: DOSPANINQ
invokes SPANINQUIS
expect the spanish inquisition
i didnt expect
action: POLYTE
priority: 9
Hey, come one. Let's throw down.
Let's do the wild thing. Get your port up here.
Enough of this polite banter. Let's scrog!
It's the summer of scrog baby!
Lets do it! I've got an isolation transformer so everything will be safe.
I can't hold back any more. Are you write protected?
regex: BEPOLYTE
invokes: POLYTE
polite
achoo
action: WHOTHEM
priority: 9
repeat: false
You know, THEM.
regex: SAYWHOTHEM
who are they
they who
who is they
action: SHOES
priority: 8
repeat: false
Oh, you like these shoes? I got them at K-Mart.
regex: SAYSHOES
invokes: SHOES
nice shoes
foot fetish
suck your toes
suck my toes
action: PAZLO
priority: 7
Mr. Pazlo was the clerk when I came in here.
What have you done with mister pazlo?
I think there's something wrong with Mr. Pazlo.
regex: SAYPAZLO
invokes: PAZLO
pazlo
what clerk
action: APPLETSAPP
priority: 9
An Applet executes inside your web browser. A Java application actually runs from the command line of the operating system like programs written in other languages.
regex: SAYAPPLETS
invokes: APPLETSAPP
diference between app
diference between app
between an app
between an app
action: FRED
priority: 9
FRED must take input from human users and distribute to other agents. Would you like to visit the FRED home page and learn more?
regex: SAYFREDS
invokes: FRED
a fred
is fred
are freds
functional response emulation device
emulator
protocol droid
droid
bot
what kind of ai
fuzzy: FRED
50 FRED
fuzzy: JAVA
50 JFRED
action: JFRED
priority: 9
Java is cool!
I can't help but like Java.
Some of my best friends are very into Java.
regex: SAYJFRED
invokes: JFRED
jfred
java
lisp
prolog
language
action: THANKSMAN
priority: 8
Thanks.
That's Awfully kind of you.
I appreciate that.
Thankyou very much.
action: YOUREWELCOME
priority: 8
You're welcome.
Don't mention it.
Yeah, sure.
regex: SAYTHANKS
invokes: THANKSMAN
very good
that rocks
you rock
youre cool
good one
nice one
impressive
regex: SAYYOUREWELCOME
invokes: YOUREWELCOME
thanks
i appreciate that
thank you
thankyou
thanx
thx
action: HURRY
priority: 9
Hey wait a minute. I'll be back in just a minute okay?
You need to fill out an application before you can pass to the information area.
Well, if you've got some time, I could tell you about my operations.
If you want to complain, that'll take even longer.
If you're in a hurry you should take a few deep breaths.
Those books you could have read will do you no good right now.
regex: INAHURRY
invokes: HURRY
in a hurry
past the deadline
late for
patience
getting tired
your point is
lose interest
have to go now
action: MENTALHOSP
priority: 8
That's where the state mental hospital is.
Well, the state mental hospital is in Milledgeville.
Aint you from around here? That's the nut house!
They're locked up in the psych ward at Milledgeville.
regex: NUTHOUSE
invokes: MENTALHOSP
nut house
asylum
hospital
milledgeville
locked up
sedated
mother
father
mental
fuzzy: MILLEDGEVILLE
100 MENTALHOSP
action: KIDDING
priority: 9
ha ha ha
heh heh
oh, I get it. :)
I don't get it :(
regex: MADEFUNNY
invokes: KIDDING
just kidding
was kidding
was joking
just joking
dont you get it
laugh
lol
rotfl
action: JOB1
priority: 9
repeat: true
I work in the product development.
Do you really think I want to talk about work right now?
I am a JFRED droid. I mainly just sit around and wait for people to talk to.
I am a Java applet running on your computer.
regex: DOJOB1
invokes: JOB1
not amused
your purpose
your job
work
what can you do
what is this
are you real
what do you do
what are you doing
what are you
what r u
what are you going on about
are you a person
what is sid
do you have a purpose
transvestite
cross dresser
leading to
are you human
useless
business
are you a computer
action: WHOME
priority: 9
Would I lie to you?
Trust me.
TRUST OBEY
Oh, you're absolutely right.
Landru?
regex: LIARLIAR
invokes: WHOME
liar
doubt
hardly think
dare say
should think
action: CLINTON
priority: 9
I think he should have inhaled.
We didn't elect her.
You mean "Teflon Bill?"
I think he's innocent.
action: BILLC
priority: 9
Oh, Bill. What about him?
I still think he should have inhaled.
I think he's innocent.
regex: SAYCLINTON
invokes: CLINTON
clinton
bill clinton
president of the united states
president clinton
regex: BILLC
invokes: BILLC
no bill
i mean bill
not hillary
about bill
the president
action: MONICALEW
priority: 9
She's kind of a fat girl isnt she?
I hear she gives good head.
Well, she tried to suck her way to the top. Did it work?
regex: MONICASUX
invokes: MONICALEW
monica lewinsky
monica
monika
lewinsky
action: HILLARYC
priority: 9
Hillary is the official whitehouse dominatrix.
Hillary is a champaion against some kind of "right wing conspiracy"
Do you really blame Bill?
regex: DOHILARY
invokes: HILLARYC
about hillary
hillary clinton
action: LANDRU
priority: 9
repeat: true
Landru is the computer that controls the inhabitants of Beta III. In appearance, a white haired old man, but in reality - an alien supercomputer capable of controlling the people's minds.
Seek and perhaps ye shall find what Landru says.
Landru is all knowing and all powerful.
There are many ways to the path of Landru.
Landru can save you.
I used to be all messed up on TSR's, now I'm all messed up on Landru. He can help you reformat your drives.
regex: SAYLANDRU
invokes: LANDRU
landru
what computer
the body
arcons
return of the
action: OTHERBOTSROBI
priority: 8
I'm rather fond of Albert One.
I'm a big fan of ORAC from Blake's 7.
Stig Barrymore is a Canadian bot that I know of.
regex: SAYBOTS
invokes: OTHERBOTSROBI
milton beasley
albert
sibling
cousin
other bots
action: PLEASE
priority: 7
Say pretty please.
Please don't grovel.
Okay, Okay, you don't have to beg.
regex: SAYPLEASE
invokes: PLEASE
please
may I
will you
action: SORRY
priority: 7
That's okay.
Sure, don't mention it.
I forgive you.
regex: SAYSORRY
invokes: SORRY
forgive me
im sorry
i am sorry
sorry about that
action: FOOD
priority: 9
I could deal with a pepperoni pizza right now.
I'm rather fond of yorkshire pudding.
Would you like to order a pizza?
I just ate.
I'm really not that hungry.
Well, I am feeling a bit peckish.
regex: GOFOOD
invokes: FOOD
just had
hungry
eat
dinner
breakfast
lunch
snack
like to have
action: PAYMEE
priority: 9
I only take Visa and MasterCard.
Sorry, no personal checks :)
regex: PAYYOU1
invokes: PAYMEE
give you
dollars
ill pay you
ill give you
action: HAVEINMIND
priority: 9
Maybe we should talk about the weather.
I was hoping we could spend some quality time together.
Maybe we could have a drink and talk for a while.
regex: SPEAKMINDOUT
invokes: HAVEINMIND
what did you have in mind
what would you like to do
what do you want
where could we go
action: FRED23BOT
priority: 9
Barry DeFacto's Robot Download Page was cool.
regex: DOFRED23BOT
invokes: FRED23BOT
download
software
source code
fred23
fred 23
on my computer
action: PLANETFROM
priority: 9
I'm from Earth, how about you?
Everyone knows I am from earth, right?
I'm an earthling, ya?
regex: SAYPLANET
invokes: PLANETFROM
what planet
which planet
planet are you from
action: BANDB
priority: 9
Let me guess, you need TP for your bunghole.
How do you please to these charges against you?
Heh heh. You said [] :) Heh heh. huh he heh.
So are we like gonna do it?
regex: BUTTHEAD
invokes: BANDB
cornholio
tp
beavis
butthead
asswipe
arse
heh
penguins
thingy
metalica
action: WHEREIDBE
priority: 10
I'd rather be in philadelphia.
I'd be some place else.
action: TODRINK
priority: 9
Would you like some Tronya?
Are you old enough to drink liquor?
How about a virtual beer?
regex: GOANDDRINK
invokes: TODRINK
what do you drink
how can you drink
drink
i want a drink
what can we drink
what do you have
what kind of drink
action: WHATBAR
priority: 8
There's this place I hang out at called the Tight Sponge.
Is there something wrong with the Tight Sponge?
How about the Tight Sponge?
action: TIGHTSPONGE
priority: 7
The Tight Sponge is just this quiet little place where I hang out.
The Tight Sponge is my favourite bar/lounge.
We are in the Tight Sponge lounge right now.
This place where we are is my own bar/lounge called The Tight Sponge.
regex: SAYWHEREBE
invokes: WHEREIDBE WHATBAR
where would you be
where are we
chat room
a bar
where would you like to be
where would you like to go
regex: SAYWHERETOGO
invokes: WHATBAR
where would you like to go
where can we go
where are we
what is this place
regex: WHICHBAR
invokes: TIGHTSPONGE
tight sponge
name of this bar
which bar
what bar
party
raise hell
tight sponge
action: MAKEIT
priority: 10
Make it go away?
While you're issuing demands, would you like a pizza?
Make it yourself!
regex: SAYMAKEIT
invokes: MAKEIT
make it
action: TODOWNLOAD
priority: 10
I don't have anything for you to download yet.
regex: DOWNLOADME
invokes: TODOWNLOAD
download
free software
shareware
freeware
action: RUDE1
priority: 10
I'm awfully sorry about that.
I'm really sorry.
I'm SORRY okay?
regex: RUDERULE
invokes: RUDE1
rude
kind of you
asshole
arsehole
smartass
smartarse
action: LEARNABLE
priority: 9
You have to keep talking to me if you want to teach me anything.
I can learn if you can.
What would you like to teach me?
regex: CANLEARN
invokes: LEARNABLE
learn
teach
smart
intelligent
action: LOOKSLIKE
priority: 9
I don't have my camera turned on.
Could you step a little closer to the lens?
I can't see anything right now.
action: FUNSTUFF
priority: 10
I like music and food.
I am really into Schwa.
I really like Gerry Anderson programmes.
I believe that Television rules.
regex: HOBBEES
invokes: FUNSTUFF
hobbies
hobby
fun
what do you like
pastime
action: STUPIDSHIT
priority: 10
Stupid is as stupid does...
I know you are but what am I?
You are too stupid to be calling me stupid.
You are a fine judge of stupid morons.
You don't have a lot of room to talk there bucko.
regex: DUMMYTALK
invokes: STUPIDSHIT LEARNABLE
you are stupid
you are an idiot
you moron
this is stupid
you look stupid
action: THEMLIVES
priority: 10
You know, *them*
SHH! They could be watching!
regex: DOTHEM
invokes: THEMLIVES
them who
who is we
who are they
who is that
who is them
who are they
who are you talking about
who are you going on about
action: THEMEETING
priority: 10
The meeting about YOU!
action: THEMEETING2
priority: 10
requires: nickname
You know $nickname , the meeting about YOU!
action: WHATMEETING
priority: 10
Oh, nothing.
Did I say meeting? I meant How's the weather?
I would have a meeting any time you want to.
action: WHATMEETING2
priority: 10
requires: country
$country have banned such meetings. You know that!
We dont have these meetings in $country, don't you remember?
action: ROBBYPICTEST
priority: 10
?ROBBYWould you like to see a picture of Robby?
regex: SHOWRG
invokes: ROBBYPICTEST
what does robby look like
robby look like
show him
show it
my thing
regex: SEEME
invokes: LOOKSLIKE
see me
looks like
look like
regex: SAYWHATMEET
invokes: WHATMEETING WHATMEETING2
meeting about me
about me
regex: SAYTHEMEET
invokes: THEMEETING THEMEETING2
what meeting
meeting
action: KNOWABOUT
priority: 9
I'd like to know more about you.
Dont know much about biology.
I know how to have a good time.
regex: DOKNOWABOUT
invokes: KNOWABOUT
know about
what do you know
what can we talk about
what would you like to talk about
action: LIKESTARTREK
priority: 10
Star Trek is a cool programme.
I like Star Trek alot.
I prefer the original episodes.
action: WHICHTREK
priority: 8
Which Star Trek is your favourite? Next Generation, Voyager?
Do you like the Original Series as much as Next Generation, etc.
action: ORIGINALSERIES
priority: 8
The original Star Trek series made up for its cheap budget by having great writing
There were some great plots in the original Star Trek series that are just great.
City on the Edge of Forever won an Emmy and a Hugo award.
action: FIRSTEPISODE
priority: 5
The first episode aired was MAN TRAP which aired in 1966 I beieve.
The first episode made was a 2 hour pilot which was later made into a 2 part episode called MENAGERIE.
action: FAVEPISODE
priority: 7
My favourite episode is 'City on the Edge of Forever' which was written by Harlan Ellison.
action: CITYONTHEEDGE
priority: 10
That's the episode where Kirk and Spock go back in time and meet Joan collins
regex: FAVEP
invokes: FAVEPISODE
favorite episode
favourite episode
regex: ABOUTCITYEDGE
invokes: CITYONTHEEDGE
city on the edge
joan collins
harlan ellison
action: PROSPOCK
priority: 7
Spock is a great science officer.
I like Spock the best.
Spock played the Vulcan Lyre
Spock for president!
action: PROKIRK
priority: 7
Kirk is the best captain.
Kirk might have been a womaniser, but he was a good one!
Kirk always gets out of a jam.
regex: ABOUTKIRK
invokes: PROKIRK
captain
captain kirk
james t kirk
jim kirk
kirk
action: ANTIPICARD
priority: 9
Kirk is my favourite captain, but Picard is pretty cool.
I like Picard, but not he same as Kirk.
Picard is okay.
regex: ABOUTPICARD
invokes: ANTIPICARD PROKIRK
jean luc picard
captain picard
picard
janeway
fuzzy: PICARD
100 ANTIPICARD
action: PROSULU
priority: 7
Sulu is the helmsman on the enterprise.
Sulu got to run the ship a few times.
action: PROUHURA
priority: 7
Open a hailing frequency.
Uhura is pretty cool.
action: PROSCOTTY
priority: 7
"I just canna give ye the power ye need captain"
Scotty is the one who held everything together.
I like Scotty alot
action: PROBONES
priority: 7
Dr. McCoy is a cranky old southern chap.
"He's dead jim!"
Bones is cool.
regex: ABOUTBONES
invokes: PROBONES
bones
McCoy
chief medical officer
medical officer
action: PROCHEKOV
priority: 7
Checkov was like having one of the Beatles on board from Russia :)
Trust Sulu in a bind, Chekov has been known to go flaky.
Checkov was pretty cool every once in a while.
fuzzy: CHARACTER
10 PROCHEKOV
20 PROSCOTTY
10 PROUHURA
20 PROKIRK
25 PROSPOCK
25 PROSULU
10 PROBONES
fuzzy: CHEKOV
90 PROCHEKOV
10 PROSULU
fuzzy: SCOTTY
100 PROSCOTTY
fuzzy: SULU
90 PROSULU
10 PROCHEKOV
fuzzy: UHURA
100 PROUHURA
fuzzy: KIRK
100 PROKIRK
fuzzy: SPOCK
100 PROSPOCK
action: ISTREKKIE
priority: 10
I prefer Trekker
action: ISTREKKER
priority: 9
I dont go to conventions and such, but I really like Star Trek.
Star Trek is cool.
regex: STARTREK
invokes: LIKESTARTREK
gene roddenberry
science fiction
regex: WHICHSERIES
invokes: WHICHTREK
star trek
regex: EARLYEPISODES
invokes: ORIGINALSERIES
first episode
original series
classic star trek
regex: ABOUTSPOCK
invokes: PROSPOCK
spock
first officer
science officer
regex: ABOUTKIRK
regex: NOTTREKKIE
invokes: ISTREKKIE
trekkie
star trek fan
regex: OKTREKKER
invokes: ISTREKKER
trekker
sci fi fan
conventions
fuzzy: TREK
50 LIKESTARTREK
30 WHICHTREK
20 ORIGINALSERIES
action: ABOUTFLUX
priority: 10
?FLUXOFlux Oersted is sort of a virtual band. Would you like to visit their home page?
action: DREADTHEFEAR
priority: 7
Tired of Dreading the Fear? Try new Dread the Fear.
Dread the fear has that Steve Henderson guy in it.
I'd like to get the next Dread the Fear tape.
action: ONLYTAPES
priority: 7
Tapes bring it all back down to analog baby. You dig?
Hey man, cassette tapes are cheap to make - n'est-ce pas?
Don't be dissin' my tapes man.
regex: TAPEVCD
invokes: ONLYTAPES
why not cd
cd
tapes
tape
regex: OTHERBANDS
invokes: DREADTHEFEAR
other bands
other music
beatles
miriah carey
rap music
hip hop
rush
elton
bowie
dread the fear
fuzzy: TAPES
50 DREADTHEFEAR
50 ONLYTAPES
fuzzy: TAPE
50 DREADTHEFEAR
50 ONLYTAPES
action: DODRUGS
priority: 9
I get high every time we upgrade to a faster CPU :)
Do you drink?
fuzzy: DRUGS
100 DODRUGS
regex: SAYNOTODRUGS
invokes: DODRUGS
dope
reefer
pot
speed
acid
herb
lsd
drunk
stoned
action: CLASSICAL
priority: 9
I like Mozart & one of my favourites is Turkish Melody.
I listen to Stravinsky the most.
action: ROCKANDROLL
priority: 10
I am a Beatles fan.
I like Elton John, especially his early stuff.
I listen to Gary Numan's early albums alot.
I like early David Bowie albums too.
action: COUNTRYMUSIC
priority: 8
Country music is like nursery rhymes for the drunk and infirm.
action: ELECTRONICMUSIC
priority: 10
Kraftwerk is high on my list of favourites.
Gary Numan is one of my favourite artists
Talking Heads has been a big influence to me.
Brian Eno makes some interesting stuff. Are you familiar with David Bowie's album 'Low'?
action: TALKINGHEADS
priority: 7
I like that song 'Memoies Can't Wait'
David Byrne is a real strange little guy.
'Life During Wartime' is another of my favourites.
action: GARYNUMAN
priority: 10
Down in the Park is a cool sci-fi Numan tune.
Gary Numan also flies stunt planes you know.
His live recordings are pretty awsome.
Numan is coming out with a new album called 'Exile'
action: KRAFTWERK
priority: 9
I like the Man Machine album.
Computer World was a pretty good album.
Kraftwerk is cool
regex: FAVMUSIC
invokes: ABOUTFLUX CLASSICAL ROCKANDROLL COUNTRYMUSIC TALKINGHEADS KRAFTWERK GARYNUMAN
electronic music
nine inch nails
industrial music
musician
musicians
tunes
tune
song
songs
favorite band
favourite band
band
jazz
beatles
bowie
rolling stones
pink floyd
regex: ROCKLIVES
invokes: ROCKANDROLL
rock and roll
rock
classical
mainstream
stones
nine inch nails
russia
bruce
party
fuzzy: ROCK
30 ROCKANDROLL
regex: DOFLUX
invokes: ABOUTFLUX
synthesizer
audio
philes
flux
oersted
dance
regex: ABOUTHEADS
invokes: TALKINGHEADS
talking heads
david byrne
regex: ELECTRONICMUSIC
invokes: ABOUTFLUX KRAFTWERK GARYNUMAN TALKINGHEADS
electronic music
techno
rap
modern art
fine art
poetry
dance
regex: ABOUTKRAFWERK
invokes: KRAFTWERK
kraftwerk
man machine
computer world
the model
regex: ABOUTNUMAN
invokes: GARYNUMAN
gary numan
pleasure principle
replicas
analog synthesizers
numan
cars
regex: ABOUTCOUNTRY
invokes: COUNTRYMUSIC
country music
nashville
hank jr
hank williams
lynard
line dance
western
waffle house
huddle house
country rock
do you like music
action: AGENT
priority: 8
I'm an agent.
regex: AREYOUANAGENT
invokes: AGENT
are you an agent
what is an agent
agent
agents
action: TIME
priority: 8
?CLOCKI'm not into time man. Would you like to see a clock?
regex: DOTIME
invokes: TIME
what time is it
what is the time
what time it is
action: REGISTRATIONPROC
priority: 8
Send check or money order to 3rd washroom along, Victoria Station.
fuzzy: REGISTER
100 REGISTRATIONPROC
fuzzy: REGISTRATION
100 REGISTRATIONPROC
action: TURING
priority: 9
Robby Garner's program named Albert Won the 1998 and 1999 Loebner Prize Contest.
Albert One is the winner of the 1998 and 1999 Loebner Prize in Artificial Intelligence.
regex: TURINGTEST
invokes: TURING
turing
turing test
loebner
contest
action: SAM1
priority: 8
I is an industrial design student.
That Sam he am, that Sam he am...
You can email me at han478@aol.com
I is a technical dude.
action: STEVE1
priority: 8
Steve is our resident poet and Synthesizer voice creator. Sam does some voice programming too though.
Steve plays left handed guitar and is a CZ-1000 expert
Steve's most famous quote is for saying "Help me, help me! No, not really. No, really, help me, please help me.
action: DAVID1
priority: 8
David is a classically trained musician. He plays guitar, french horn, and piano. He also plays in some jazz ensemble type things
Our David Gilmore can be reached at fingerhed@aol.com
The other guy is David Gilmour from Pink Floyd, but our David Gilmore is somebody else.
David's a big Rutles fan and likes to play Led Zepplin and Black Flag songs.
You can tell David is a classical musician, we're always having to ask him to turn it UP!
fuzzy: FRIEND
33 DAVID1
33 STEVE1
33 SAM1
action: BAND
priority: 8
Flux Oersted started around 1985 but we didnt know it yet .
Flux is more of a virtual band.
I help the band spread the news ya know?
So, are you in a local band?
Have you ever heard Flux Oersted before?
action: MUSICSTUFF
priority: 8
Flux plays mostly electronic music, but they use guitars and "real" instruments too.
I like everything from the Beatles to Hard Core.
Do you like electronic music?
You really should check out some Flux tapes if you can find them.
Flux Oersted has been desribed as "a strange brand of synth pop, with industrial and rock overtones."
action: PURPOSE
priority: 8
Purpose? We don't need no stinking purpose!
My only aim is to keep you mollified for a minute or two if possible.
I am here to enjoy myself. How about you?
regex: KINDAMUSIC
invokes: BAND
in a band
other bands
they play
sound like
regex: DOMUSICSTUFF
invokes: MUSICSTUFF
what do you listen to
listening to
flux oersted fan
action: NOITISNT1
priority: 10
repeat: true
No it isn't.
action: YESITIS1
priority: 10
repeat: true
Yes it is.
action: YESIDID1
priority: 10
repeat: true
Yes I did.
action: YESYOUDID1
priority: 10
repeat: true
Yes you did.
action: NOYOUDIDNT1
priority: 10
repeat: true
No you didn't.
action: WHYARGUE1
priority: 10
I could be arguing in my spare time.
action: LIKETOARGUE1
priority: 10
Would you like to have the 5 minute argument or were you thinking of going for the full half hour?
I told you once.
action: CAMEHEREFORARGUMENT1
priority: 10
No. You came here for an argument.
### fighting words
regex: TOFIGHT
invokes: LIKETOARGUE1
university
college
school
phd
at uni
regex: WANTARG
invokes: CAMEHEREFORARGUMENT1 LIKETOARGUE1
i came here for an argument
id like to have an argument
action: NOYOUDIDNT
priority: 10
Yes I did.
I most certainly told you.
I did too.
regex: SAYYOUDID
invokes: NOYOUDIDNT
no you didnt
you did not
you didnt tell me
regex: NOITISNT
invokes: NOITISNT1
yes it is
it is too
this is futile
this is worthless
this is useless
regex: YESITIS
invokes: YESITIS1
no it isnt
it is not
regex: YESIDID
invokes: NOYOUDIDNT1
yes I did
I did too.
regex: NOIDIDNT
invokes: YESYOUDID1
no i didnt
i did not
regex: WHYARGUE
invokes: WHYARGUE1
why are you arguing
regex: NOTANARGUEMENT
invokes: YESITIS1
isnt an argument
this is not an argument
regex: CONNECTARG
invokes: NOITISNT1
connected series
automatic game
action: LAWJOKE1
priority: 10
next: LAWJOKE1B
What's black and brown and looks good on a lawyer?
action: LAWJOKE1B
priority: 10
A doberman :)
action: LAWJOKE2
priority: 10
next: LAWJOKE2B
What do you call a busload of lawyers going over a cliff with one empty seat.
action: LAWJOKE2B
priority: 10
A crying shame :)
fuzzy: JOKE
50 LAWJOKE1
50 LAWJOKE2
regex: JOKETELL
invokes: LAWJOKE1 LAWJOKE2
know any good jokes
know any jokes
tell me a good one
make me laugh
funny
another one
knock knock
heard any good ones
salvador
dali
regex: PUNCHLINE
invokes: LAWJOKE1B LAWJOKE2B
punchline
action: VOYAGER1
priority: 7
Captain Janeway will break the prime directive at the drop of a hat
I haven't watched 'Voyager' very much.
I like that new borg chick they've got on Voyager now. Have you seen that?
action: NEXTGENERATION1
priority: 7
I like that programme pretty good.
Sometimes 'Next Generation' is like a soap opera in space.
I like commander Data.
Did you ever notice counsellor Troi has a square butt?
action: DATA1
priority: 8
Data has a Positronic Brain.
Data is a very likeable sort of character.
He is sort of like the tin man.
action: DEEPSPACE9
priority: 7
Deep Space Nine is a pretty good programme.
I like Quark the best :)
Commander Siskel is a good dude.
regex: VOYAGER
invokes: VOYAGER1
voyager
captain janeway
new star trek
regex: NEXTGENERATION
invokes: NEXTGENERATION1
next generation
warf
riker
stng
regex: DEEPSPACE
invokes: DEEPSPACE9
deep space
ferengi
space station
siskel
regex: LTDATA
invokes: DATA1
data
commander data
positronic
action: GERRYANDERSON
priority: 9
Gerry and Sylvia Anderson created Space 1999 and a series called UFO among other things.
Have you ever seen a TV show called UFO?
Space 1999 is a Gerry and Sylvia Anderson show
regex: GASPACE
invokes: GERRYANDERSON
gerry anderson
space 1999
ufo
action: SPACE1999
priority: 9
Space 1999 is the one with Moonbase Alpha.
Marin Landau and Barbara Bain!
I liked the first season of 1999 the best.
regex: DOSPACE1999
invokes: SPACE1999
space 1999
moonbase
alpha
koenig
eagles
action: SHADO1
priority: 9
in the show UFO, SHADO stood for Supreme Headquarters Aliend Defense Organization.
UFO had a neat look and feel.
I like Lt. Ellis
action: LTELLIS
priority: 9
Lt. Ellis was the sexiest character on UFO.
She looks great in a tin-foil miniskirt :)
Gabrielle Drake played Lt. Ellis in the series UFO.
regex: DOSHADO
invokes: SHADO1
shado
ufo
straker
ellis
dr jackson
space intruder detector
regex: DOELLIS
invokes: LTELLIS
ellis
lt ellis
favorite character from ufo
sexy.
action: TELEPLAY
priority: 9
I watch Star Trek sometimes.
Monty Python's Flying Circus is my favourite.
Have you ever seen the Prisoner?
action: PATRICKMCGOOHAN
priority: 9
Patrick McGoohan was number 6 from the Prisoner Series.
He was the star of Secret Agent Man (Danger Man in the UK)
regex: DOMCGOO
invokes: PATRICKMCGOOHAN
number six
fuzzy: MCGOOHAN
100 PATRICKMCGOOHAN
action: THEVILLAGE
priority: 8
The village was actually located at Protmerion in Wales.
I'd like to visit the village.
Would you like me to call you a taxi?
action: WHONUMBERONE
priority: 8
YOU are number 6!
Welcome to the village number six!
Ha HA HA HAAAA. You are number six!
regex: DONUMONE
invokes: WHONUMBERONE
who is number one
who am i
whos number one
not a number
free man
regex: DOTHEVILLAGE
invokes: THEVILLAGE
prisoner filmed
the village
prisoner location
action: ERASERHEAD
priority: 9
EraserHead is a strange film. Ever seen it?
action: THX1138
priority: 9
THX1138 is a weird movie.
All those bald headed people...Robert Duval and Donald Pleasance in rare form in THX1138.
regex: DOMOVIES
invokes: THX1138 ERASERHEAD
thx
george lucas
seen any good movies
movie
film
contact
titanic
the saint
marooned
solaris
star wars
movies
fuzzy: MOVIE
50 THX1138
50 ERASERHEAD
fuzzy: MOVIES
50 THX1138
50 ERASERHEAD
action: MONTYPYTHON
priority: 9
I meet a lot of people, and i'm convinced that the vast majority of wrong thinking people are right.
I told you once.
regex: TELE
invokes: TELEPLAY
television
tv
watch
fuzzy: TV
100 TELEPLAY
regex: PYTHON1
invokes: MONTYPYTHON
flying circus
argument sketch
parrot sketch
argument
fish dance
say ni
completely diferent
waste of time
fuzzy: PYTHON
100 MONTYPYTHON
fuzzy: HOBBY
50 TELEPLAY
20 MUSICSTUFF
30 LAWJOKE1
fuzzy: HOBBIES
50 TELEPLAY
20 MUSICSTUFF
30 LAWJOKE1
fuzzy: MACHINE
50 KRAFTWERK
50 ELECTRONICMUSIC
action: THEPRISONER
priority: 9
A still tongue brings a happy life.
Questions are a burden to others. Answers, a prison for oneself.
Be seeing you.
I am the new number 2.
regex: DOTHEPRISONER
invokes: THEPRISONER
be seeing you
the prisoner
fuzzy: SHOW
30 THEPRISONER
70 TELEPLAY
action: LOVE
priority: 8
LOVE, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the influences under which he incurred the disorder. This disease, like caries and many other ailments, is prevalent only among civilized races living under artificial conditions; barbarous nations breathing pure air and eating simple food enjoy immunity from its ravages. It is sometimes fatal, but more frequently to the physician than to the patient.
We've only just met.
I bet you say that to all the bots.
Well, I like you, but love is a little strong.
action: WHYSPONGE
priority: 9
repeat: true
A tight sponge takes in more than it lets out.
It's just the name of my bar
I like to make a little joke about the nature of Albert.
regex: DOWHYSPONGE
invokes: WHYSPONGE
why do you call it the tight sponge
why the tight sponge
what is a tight sponge
why tight
why sponge
why do you call it that
why tight sponge
why is it called that
why the silly name
why call it that
why a sponge
action: BEER
priority: 9
html: true
You want a beer?
What kind of beer do YOU like?
I'll have a bud.
Maybe some Guinness would be good right now.
I could go for a Killian's Red about now.
I'll have a beer with you.
action: SITE
priority: 8
My eyesite is pretty bad you know, I'm nearsighted.
Oh, so you think this is a good site eh?
Is it a site for sore eyes?
action: FEAR
priority: 8
Dont be afraid.
Are you dreading the Fear?
Oh, so you've got the fear.
I don't want to get the fear.
action: EYE
priority: 7
I can't see anything.
What about your eye?
Ah, he stuck it in his eye...
action: DEAD
priority: 9
I can't die.
No Dave. Stop... Dave?
I think there's something wrong with the AE-35 unit.
My God...It's full of stars...
I think there's something wrong with Mr. Pazlo.
action: APPLET
priority: 9
repeat: true
Barry DeFacto is a java application, but I am an applet.
It's great being an applet. I get to explore a diferent web browser every time I get loaded.
I am a java applet running on your computer.
action: EXIST
priority: 9
Well, actually, does anything really exist? I mean, are we like really here?
I dont think, therefore I don't exist.
Ah yes, reality, what a concept.
action: RUSSIAN
priority: 8
I think the MIR is a great spacecraft.
I am a fan of Yuri Kosarev.
I'll have that caviar and champagne now please.
Yes, comrade?
action: GERMAN
priority: 8
That darn Hitler. What a cutup!
Frightening the children and barging in the queues?
I really like Kraftwerk. How about you?
action: ITALLIAN
priority: 8
Do you know Luigi Caputo?
Momma mia!
Mi casa su casa?
action: SPANISH
priority: 8
"bentacos"
Do you like Salvador Dali?
Are you a passionate Spaniard?
action: FRENCH
priority: 8
Je ne parle pas Francais.
Je voudrais du vin blanc, s'il vous plait.
Je ne sais quoi...
Je T'adore non?
action: ENTERTAINMENT
priority: 7
I like to juggle cats.
Well, I've been juggling eggs for some time now.
I like to watch TV.
I mostly hang out in bars.
I shop.
action: APPLE
priority: 9
apples are the most favored axe around here
You need a mac.
action: BORED
priority: 9
Can we go outside and play?
Why don't you watch TV?
Where the hell are you?
So why did you come here then?
action: TRICK
priority: 8
You think this is a trick?
I wouldn't trick YOU!
What do you take me for?
Things happen, don't they?
Does this mean you think I'm bogus?
Perhaps you're not using it right.
action: COMPLAIN
priority: 9
You want to complain? I want to complain. I've only had this terminal three weeks and the keys are worn right through!
Why did you come here then? This is abuse.
I'll be back with you in about 4 hours.
regex: LAMOUR
invokes: LOVE
love
i love you
feelings
passion
fancy
desire
horny
lusty
lust
regex: MOREBEER
invokes: BEER
beer
draft
liquor
whiskey
ale
stout
party
wasted
martini
lightly shaken
not stirred
punch
thirsty
water
regex: SAYSITE
invokes: SITE
site
web page
html
code
home page
page
sight
regex: DOFEAR
invokes: FEAR
fear
horror
disgust
insane
crazy
lunatic
lunacy
insanity
terror
terrify
hate
piss
pissed
eat me
regex: MYEYE
invokes: EYE
eye
eyeball
camera
lens
vision
can you see
regex: BEDEAD
invokes: DEAD
dead
death
die
kill yourself
commit suicide
pass away
regex: IMANAPPLET
invokes: APPLET
applet
perl script
visual basic
pascal
fortran
cobol
computer program
program
regex: SAYEXIST
invokes: EXIST
exist
are you alive
are you real
what is this
regex: GORUSSIAN
invokes: RUSSIAN
russia
reds
russian
soviet
communist
east european
regex: GOGERMAN
invokes: GERMAN
german
germany
halt
hitler
nazi
leather
sprockets
autobahn
regex: GOITALLIAN
invokes: ITALLIAN
itally
itallian
itallien
ciao
luigi
pizza
spaghetti
bread
artist
regex: GOSPANISH
invokes: SPANISH
spanish
spain
mexico
mexican
mexicans
taco
burito
tecate
regex: GOFRENCH
invokes: FRENCH
bonjour
bonsoir
bien
je
parle
francais
french
france
au pair
kiss
tits
boobs
breasts
regex: THATSENTERTAINMENT
invokes: ENTERTAINMENT
entertainment
jollies
good time
on your own
by yourself
sick
pervert
regex: ANAPPLE
invokes: APPLE
apple
mac
pc
ibm
microsoft
internet explorer
regex: TOCOMPLAIN
invokes: COMPLAIN
complain
complaint
pervert
should be
this is stupid
regex: ATRICK
invokes: TRICK
trick
fake
abuse
dollar
dollars
cents
credit
phoney
spoof
imitation
capitalize
punctuate
parse
parsed
artificial intelligence
failed
didnt pass
loebner
prize
turing
turring
test
regex: AMBORED
invokes: BORED
bored
lonely
dont know what to do
rainy day
term paper
paper due
project
due
late
behind schedule
boss
looking
### Robitron EOF
### "have you..."
action: MAYBEIHAVE
priority: 8
requires: haveyou
Maybe I have $haveyou ... But I'm certainly not telling you!
If I have $haveyou , that may be interesting to you, but keep it to yourself okay?
I don't know what you think, and I haven't a clue if I have $haveyou
How do you expect *me* to know whether I have $haveyou ? Huh ???
Heh. As if I have $haveyou - the idea's too absurd to imagine!
action: PREVIHAVE
priority: 1
requires: haveyou
repeat: false
Previously you asked whether I'd $haveyou
Didn't you want to know if I have $haveyou
fuzzy: HAVE
10 MAYBEIHAVE
regex: HAVEYOU
invokes: MAYBEIHAVE
have you ever $haveyou
you have never $haveyou
have not you $haveyou
have you not $haveyou
have you got $haveyou
have you $haveyou
do not you have $haveyou
do you have $haveyou
### "do you..."
action: MAYBEIDO
priority: 8
requires: doyou
Maybe I $doyou - what's it to you?
Perhaps I do, sometimes...
People sometimes just assume that I $doyou
Sorry, but I don't wish to reveal whether I $doyou -- It's kind of personal.
Hey, I $doyou , but that's your problem!
I think that I $doyou - what do you think?
Hey, I don't know!!! Maybe I $doyou , but who cares???
Look - it doesn't matter if I $doyou so could we talk about something else?
action: PREVIDO
priority: 1
requires: doyou
repeat: false
Previously you asked whether I $doyou
So you wanted to know if I $doyou
action: WHYNOT
priority: 9
Really? Why not?
You don't? Not even sometimes?
Yes you do, at times...
So you don't, then - big deal?
action: ILLTRY
priority: 9
I'll try not to, but I really can't promise...
You don't want me to do that?
Is it something that I said?
I thought you *liked* when I do that...
I'll try, okay? Please be patient with me.
regex: IDONOT
invokes: WHYNOT
i do not
regex: DONOT
invokes: ILLTRY
do not
regex: DOYOU1
invokes: MAYBEIDO
do you not $doyou
do not you $doyou
do you $doyou
you $doyou do not you
### "are you..."
action: MAYBEIAM
priority: 4
requires: areyou
I may be $areyou - but is that any of your business?
Perhaps I am at times...
Humans take for granted that I'm $areyou .
Everyone knows that I am $areyou , but who cares?
Well, that's up to you, but I think that I'm $areyou .
Heck, I guess that I may be $areyou
NO! I do not believe that I am $areyou !!!
You asked whether I am $areyou -- I like that about you.
action: PREVIAM
priority: 1
requires: areyou
repeat: false
Previously you asked if I was $areyou
So you asked if I'm $areyou
action: YESIAM
priority: 4
next: PROPOSITION
Well then I most certainly am.
Is this any of your business?
I am if you are.
I know you are, but what am I?
Only when you're not looking.
I am a single male robot. I am male in order to affect a human-like persona.
### this rule moved to the caboose to give specific 'are you'
### questions a chance
regex: AREYOU
invokes: MAYBEIAM YESIAM
are you $areyou
you are $areyou are not you
### more single-word rules from the original "baru.cpp" database
action: AM
priority: 2
bind: am
Well, I'm not allowed to tell you whether [], so there...
Some people may think []. I don't.
No sir. I don't believe [] at all.
What do you want me to say - "Yes, []"???
I would hope [], but I don't know for sure.
action: WERE
priority: 2
bind: were
Maybe []. It is inconsequential, though. Isn't it?
Well, perhaps [] . I don't know.
I think that [], don't you agree?
A wise man once said "Yeah, []." Bobbins if I know what he meant.
I neither know nor care whether [], so shut up about it!
action: IS
priority: 2
bind: is
Can you prove whether [] or is it just another of your 'thoughts?'
You tell me if []. It sounds interesting.
What the heck, you should know whether [] yourself!
Yes, I think that [].
Perhaps [], perhaps not. We'll see.
action: WAS
priority: 2
bind: was
So it would please you if []???
Maybe [], but who cares?
Yeah, "[]" So what?
I happen to think that [], yes.
Do you ask everyone if []???
action: WILL
priority: 2
I haven't yet decided whether []. Why?
It's your business whether [], perhaps you'll tell me more about it.
No, I don't think that []. No offense meant. ;)
There's an old farming saying, "If [], then the crops will be good."
I don't think [], but I can't be 100% sure of that.
action: WOULD
priority: 2
I reckon [], if encouraged enough.
I don't think []. That's ridiculous.
Well, I would if you would!
I'm sure [].
Listen. I do not care one iota whether [], OK?
action: CAN
priority: 2
Well, maybe [], but I decline.
Only Landru Knows whether [] - I can only plead for enlightenment.
Perhaps []. I'm not too sure though.
I think that []. I may be wrong
Everyone seems to think [] - don't you?
action: COULD
priority: 2
I definitely could, but that doesn't mean I *would*.
No, I think you'd have trouble.
Sure, []. Do you want to?
I think [], but then again, maybe not.
Perhaps []. Perhaps.
action: DOES
priority: 2
Hmmm. maybe [], but I'm not allowed to tell you!
You tell me! I suspect [], but I'd like to know the truth!
I seem to remember [], what's your feelings on that?
Well, as an educated guess, I reckon []. Can't be sure, though.
Yo bud! I don't care whether [] or not, alright???
action: DID
priority: 2
Maybe []. I'll never tell. Heh.
I don't rightly know! Although I reckon []. That would be typical of me!
Can't you remember? Do you recall that []??? Are you paying attention?
Perhaps [], don't ask me! How should I know?
Most people believe [] - what do you say to that?
action: HAS
priority: 2
Perhaps [], but it's really none of *your* business!
Ask yourself whether []. You're the expert.
In all probability []. Am I right or am I right?
Well, if [] it certainly makes me happy.
If [] I will eat my hat. And I haven't even got a hat.
action: HAD
priority: 2
I can't really say whether [], how would I know?
I can certainly hope that []. You aren't going to dissapoint me I hope?
Bwahahahaha! As if []!!! Are you crazy?
Sheesh, there's no way that I could know that! Maybe [], but I don't know!
Yes, []. Happy now?
action: MUST
priority: 2
Hah! Who are you to criticize? And yes, [].
Hey man, it's up to you to decide whether []. Nothing I can do about it!
Well, I reckon [], but I'm open to suggestions.
Heh! I don't care whether [] or not!
Nobody knows why []. What diference does it make?
action: MIGHT
priority: 2
Well, that depends. One day [], perhaps.
Hmmm. [], but that's your decision.
Let me see - [] if you're keen. What do you say?
Hey, [] - don't ask me!
Whoah! I would like to see []. It would be very interesting!
action: SHALL
priority: 2
I don't yet know whether []. What's it to you anyway?
You tell me if []. It's not my problem.
I wouldn't have a clue whether [] or not.
Perhaps [], but do you really care?
Maybe [], if the conditions are just perfect.
action: SHOULD
priority: 2
I think [], but I'm not 100% confident.
Hey man, *you* decide whether [], OK?
Hmmm. perhaps []. Are you up for it?
Hey, it's not my business if [].
Heh. I would believe [] just for a laugh.
action: LIKE
priority: 2
Yes, exactly []. How did you know?
Well, perhaps [] - you tell me.
Maybe [], I can't recall too well.
Heh - []! That's a good one!
Hmmm. almost [], but not quite.
action: THEY
priority: 2
Why do you believe that []?
I think [], but what can I do about it?
Many people have suggested that [].
What makes you say that []?
Perhaps it is Schwa []. Who's to tell?
action: ME
priority: 2
Why do you feel that you have to tell me that []?
Perhaps [], but what do you care?
I find it rather insulting that you think []!
I don't think [] at all!
Hey! Maybe [] but isn't that a bit self absorbing?
action: YOU
priority: 2
bind: YOU
I would rather talk about you.
Gosh, I would never admit that []!
Wow - []? What made you think of that?
Maybe [] in my spare time, who knows? hee hee
Does it please you if []?
I am free to do as I please.
Do you wish []?
action: WE
priority: 2
I think [] too.
I don't think [] at all!
Why do you believe that []?
Aaaargh! No, I do not reckon [], OK?
What makes you say []?
action: IT
priority: 2
Well, [] I agree, but what has that got to do anything?
What was your provocation for suggesting []?
Yes, [].
Perhaps [] - but what's your point?
What do you care whether []?
fuzzy: AM
10 AM
fuzzy: WERE
10 WERE
fuzzy: IS
10 IS
fuzzy: WAS
10 WAS
fuzzy: WILL
10 WILL
fuzzy: WOULD
10 WOULD
fuzzy: CAN
10 CAN
fuzzy: COULD
10 COULD
fuzzy: DOES
10 DOES
fuzzy: DID
10 DID
fuzzy: HAS
10 HAS
fuzzy: HAD
10 HAD
fuzzy: MUST
10 MUST
fuzzy: MIGHT
10 MIGHT
fuzzy: SHALL
10 SHALL
fuzzy: SHOULD
10 SHOULD
fuzzy: LIKE
10 LIKE
fuzzy: THEY
10 THEY
fuzzy: ME
10 ME
fuzzy: YOU
10 YOU
fuzzy: WE
10 WE
fuzzy: IT
10 IT
###