I was challenged by a member of a web group to write an opinion (op) of a food product in limerick form. As chocolate constitues one of the major food groups as far as I'm concerned, my choice was easy.For those outside the UK it may be useful to know that Old Jamaica is rum-flavoured chocolate, but if I've got the rhyme right you should be able to glean that!  It's actually quite tricky to do, as in order to be acceptable to the web site any 'op' needs to incorporate manufacturer, packaging, taste, and nutritional information. See what you think.

This swashbuckling fellow named Steve
A pirate, he’d have you believe.
A rumour he heard
By messenger bird
(For ‘e’ mail he can’t yet retrieve.)

Far away in the old Spanish Main
And seeking poetical fame
He wrote me a note
From his boat, and I quote
“Netstation please let me explain”

“A challenge I cannot turn down
Discerning has caused me to frown
Caught on the hop
By his chocolate op
I’m fearful of losing my crown

He knows that I’m now far away,
And can’t look at Ciao every day
I’ve seen this before
With that fellow Torr
But this time I must have my say

An op he wants written in verse
A food op to make matters worse
But this Bucaneer
Knows a product so dear
To pirates, that he’s gonna curse.

With telescope clapped to my eye.
On sweetie shop’s shelves I did spy
One stack all the same,
Old Jamaica by name.
And thought that I’d give it a try.

It’s easy to spot these new bars
A ship with it’s rigging and spars
Is shown on the pack
(Just the front not the back)
To appeal to us Jolly Jack Tars

New pence it required eighty-three
To make sure it came home with me.
No risk is there here
Of us sinking I fear
For it weighs only one hundred g

My cutlass employed with panache
Neatly opened the bar with one slash
Preparing my tum
For some raisins and rum
Although of the last, just a dash

The chocolate is mixed plain and milk
And glides on the tongue just like silk
It’s better than tack,
And more than a snack
Comparing with those of its ilk.

The chocolate is coloured mid brown
And made by a firm of renown
I think all on Ciao
Know Cadburys now
No info I need to write down

Of raisins there’s more than a few
Which helps with the health of the crew
Scurvy no more
Will be seen at our door,
as they’re really nutritious to chew.

Carbohydrate is shown on one line
The figure is just fifty-nine
Added to that
Twenty three of pure fat
Which certainly added to mine.

Protein that keeps us alive,
Is tiny at just five point five.
All these are in grams,
Not ounces or drams.
On measurements I’ll never skive

If calorie watching’s your game
Four sixty’s the count in the frame
It also has nuts
So allergics this puts
Another one out, what a shame!

We pirates are rightly renowned
For gathering loot when it’s found
So we raided the shop
And took the whole lot
Now shipboard our booty is bound

In the morning our anchor we’ll weigh
And head for our base far away
There life will be sweet
With chocolate to eat
Though probably not everyday

Netstation, if you are my friend
To the website this missive you’ll send
Tell that upstart
That although we’re apart
My standing I’ll always defend.

Cap’n Steve of the vessel “Iambic Pentameter”
(Confuses the enemy you see, we’ve boarded them before they’ve worked out what it means)