Vicky's secret rant


The math nerd comes out (prefers not to fall out)...

(Feedback email submitted to Victoria's Secret regarding their bra-size calculators. I also submited a rant to www.justmysize.com which provided an even-more ridiculous 38AA calculation!!)

I have to admit, I'm one of those women baffled by the "size" issue. For a long time, I thought I was a 36C, then after a visit to some department store learned I was a 32DD. Thought the woman was on crack! But you know what? The bras she gave me fit better than anything I'd ever owned. Granted, they never created the kind of cleavage your models display, but by God, those suckers stayed in place! They actually supported me!

A few years later, I've gained and lost a few pounds, but generally I'm still the same size (yes, this is getting to a point). Mysteriously, however, the size calculations I get at yours stores and online differ VASTLY.

I have two 36C bras with the convertable straps — per a consultation a couple years ago in a VS stores. Those bras are OK, but they have never had a spectacular fit. Bounce is a definite issue, and I always have to figure out where to "put" the bulge that spills out over the top. :-O I ask you: should I really have to so-creatively arrange my bosom so it can fit in an undergarment?!!

Today I visited another [Victoria's Secret] store, where I told the woman I was a 32DD. She measured me and concluded I was somewhere between a 32D and 32DD — but 34C was a "sister size" I could always use. How a band size 2" bigger could still stay in place and not ride up was beyond me, but I nodded my head obediently.

Now the POINT of this email is that when I tried to calculate my size from this WEBSITE tonight, using the directions indicated, my size came out as a 36A!! I am telling you, NOTHING could be farther from the case. It's not as bad as another site that told me I should wear a 38AA (which they mysteriously didn't make) ... but still!!

As far as I can tell, that peculiar 5" which you instruct customers to add to the measurement under the bust is TOTALLY unnecessary. What makes me conclude I'm a 32D? Because below the bust and right at my underarm, I'm about 32" around. At the widest point of my bust, I'm 36-37" around. Thus by my calculation, band size is 32", cup size is D-DD depending on the style.

Sad to say, some quick research suggests that this rinky-dink 5" addition is a common quirk of online bra calculators. You're in fairly good department-store company, sad to say. But it is THIS 5" ADDITION, I am convinced, that's probably responsible for so many of the miss-sized bras women wear!

Well, I'll end my rant. But SERIOUSLY, I urge you in the strongest possible tones to reconsider the calulations you provide on your site. Adding 5" to that measurement just doesn't make sense! Be a vehicle for change! Be on the cutting edge! Don't try to persuade would-be buyers of a 36C that they have to measure 31" under bust and 39" at the widest point!!!

follow-up
The auto-generated response email promised I'd hear back within 24 hours. Mysteriously, no such personal response appeared. I hope someone at least laughed heartily. Perhaps my email got circulated through internal email? Such visions give me hopes ... not of better-fitting undergarments ... but of people forced to ponder boob-geometry.

posted @ 03:50 PM on Wed - January 21, 2004 remark! Email |  as quoted:
before I said ...  but more recently: 

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