gender, power and theology


> The Men's Ministry is challenging. We are living in a spiritual
> culture where men are being challenged to be strong in the
> faith. A good, close and spiritual mentor of mine has challenged
> "a bunch of us" with the idea this present spiritual culture has
> been feminized.

Gender and the character of God is a really interesting issue to me, especially as I look at the influence of feminism on our culture, and the way gay culture is perceived as offering an alternate perspective on manhood/masculinity. In the New York Times magazine, an article recently profiled the "Down Low" culture of gay black men -- who emphasize their masculinity in contrast to what they see as a "sissy," effeminate gay/white culture.

It makes me think of many things. Power. Emotions.

Feminism in our society has been a great detriment to women, in many ways. We've been short-changed by a "revolution" that often sets traditionally-masculine/male achievements and roles as the standard to which women should aspire. Likewise, typically masculine expressions of power are accepted as the only expressions of power: visible, public, agressive, blatant. They are the forms of power to which women should aspire in order to be legitimated.

Not that those forms of power or the roles men have traditionally occupied are bad, but a key problem in our society is that we rarely appreciate or accomplish the complementarity God intended by revealing his image in the interaction of both sexes.

And it's interesting to see how that plays out in the church. All too often I think people get invested in what I'm crudely terming the "masculine" kind of power — which I also tend to associate with religion and just doing things because you should. The extreme opposite of that is the often-witless emphasis on spirituality (which unfortunately dominates so much of Christian music) that I suspect you may be mean by your referenced to a "feminized" spiritual culture.

A little bit I struggle with your comment — not knowing the full context or meaning behind it — because I think God created women to reveal a great deal about the way He operates in weakness and quiet, subtle, unobtrusive power. For whatever reason, I think we as women are sometimes more comfortable with the emotional aspect of our beings. There may be aspects of intimacy with God that we "get" in a certain way. But unfortunately so much of our society's quest for spirituality is completely divorced from the life of the mind and of reflection — and therefore falls grossly short of the wholistic relationship and commitment God intended. Maybe that's often associated with what might be crudely called a more "masculine" faith/religion.

But we need both. We need the logic, the apologetics, the theology. And yet, we also need the heart behind all that. We need to acknowledge how much the desires of the heart motivate a logic we typically think of as non-emotional and therefore rational.

And yes, we certainly need men with "balls," to put it in a fashion my dad will surely wince at. ;) I see "Christian" men in the church, and sometimes I despair of ever finding a man I could date, much less consider as the father of my children. I see men unwilling to directly ask a woman out and risk rejection. I see men unwilling to trust that God designed marriage for a purpose and truly knows something about their needs which a restless heart cannot, while single, fathom. I see men unwilling to take God seriously enough to question him and wrestle with him, as Jacob did.

But I guess I'm especially cursed, having first known a Christian like my father! :) A man honest to the point of hurtfulness at times, but one of the most humble leaders I have ever known (and the swiftest to apologize for an unkind expression, even if he had the right of the argument). A man brave enough to be transparent, though sometimes others might wish his "walls" were a bit more opaque. ;) A man whose commitment to God I sometimes find daunting in its commitment to ascetic holiness more than freedom (or so it seems) ... but whose sincerity of heart and compassion for others can never be doubted. A man "big" enough (and therefore small enough) to say he now "wears his Christian flag" much more quietly than once he used to, because he has grown to appreciate the sincerity of others' devout piety, while continuing to plead with them for truth in a remarkable love. A man who probably cries more often and more freely than me, his daughter, and who in so doing has taught me a great deal about the strength and tenderness of our God. There is a grace in seeing such tenderness in one so strong; I think it is one of the most shocking and almost-too-good-to-be-true qualities of our God. It is power used to flourish others and prosper them — not abused or afraid to be known, but not too arrogant to be quiet and hidden when need be.
—from an email to a childhood pastor and longstanding friend of the family

posted @ 03:29 PM on Mon - August 11, 2003 remark! Email |  as quoted:
before I said ...  but more recently: 

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