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More Poems by Dave Bailey
| To the World | Times Like These | No Time for Tears | Not Why | Pray for the World | Friend in You | Not by Chance | Maybe | Eyes of the Heart | I am Looking | Never Noticed | MRI Moments | late-nite words |
To theWorld
- This was the first song I completed after returning from the hospital.
- It was originally inspired by the first book I read in that time, "How to
- Live Between Office Visits" by Bernie Siegel. I started working on it and
- hit a lull. Later, i hit this crazy emotional land mine and went running
- out of the house to take a long walk in the hot sun. it worked, i mellowed,
- and by the time i returned over an hour later i had finshed the new song
- (having scribbled the remaining words on the only paper I had with me: a
- dollar bill, which I still carry with me today). This song has really
- become one of the core set of new cornerstones that make up my view of the world and is the first song I think of when asked to play.
what is life if not a chance to make a difference what are days if not
different chances to live what is time if not a season for renewal what's
renewal but just another reason to give give love, to the world
what are friends if not reflections of the spirit what is hope if not a
blending of the future and the past what are dreams if not decisions to
awaken the soul that conquers fear is the only one that lasts, long enough,
to give love to the world
it's not a question of freedom
it's not a question of pain
it's just a matter of learning
we all must feel the loss before we know the gain
so when the demons and the dragons come to haunt you and you're certain
that the chance for peace is gone close your eyes and listen to the wind
blow You'll hear His voice of love passing through, passing on, giving love
to the world
Times like these
- In February of 1996, while on a business trip, I woke up in the middle of
- the night in my hotel room and jotted the following lines down on my
- notebook. I remember waking up in the morning and reading through it and
- not really understanding what it was about or why i had written what i did.
- I let it set, not really knowing if it was a poem or a song; 5 months later
- looking back and reading it again, it has struck me as almost prophetic.
- I'm still not sure understand it, but know that it came from somewhere deep
- inside of me. It's call called "times like these"
In times like these we wonder if it's possible to hide The storm front
moves so quickly, The canyon seems so wide It's simply too damn easy to
miss the forest for the trees In times like these
In times like these we look upon what's on the other shore But the river's
running madly, Like it's never run before There's a hurricane behind us
where once was just a breeze In times like these
We cannot be the first, we will not be the last to cling to the familiar
and second guess the past We're frozen in the headlights, so much light
it's hard to see In times like these
In times like these we tremble, each tear burns like a poison Each friend
becomes a savior, never mind the reason The ghosts return to haunt us,
taunt us to break free In times like these
In times like these we question when and where the wound began We agonize
the losses and mend the broken hand But with healing comes renewal, and a
rebirth of the dream The phoenix only rises after death's relentless scream
All is what it is, and not what it may seem There is no other path but to
press on, to believe
in times like these......
No Time for Tears
- On the day of my very first medical oncologist appointment, I entered the
- doctor's office reasonably upbeat. I expected a comprehensive treatment
- plan to be laid out before me that would offer me some degree of tangible
- hope. I liked the guy and felt kinda comfortable with his demeanor.
- However, he offered me two treatment options and then indicated that either
- treatment had some chance of being beneficial, and neither had any
- guarantee of helping. After discussing this for awhile, I grabbed leslie's
- hand and asked him "is this kind of tumor ALWAYS lethal?" he kinda paused, grimaced, tightened his lips, paused, and finally replied "they're tough to beat...but I've got a 70 year old who just passed 2 years and you're only 30, so there's no telling how much better you may respond to a variety of things..." Not sure that was the answer I was looking for.
- later, i left leslie at the desk to sweat out the insurance stuff (bless
- her heart) and went out to the car to wait for her, with more than a
- ziillion things running through my head, and heart and soul. Sitting there
- in that hot car, I made a snap decision that if time was going to be short,
- I wanted each moment to be the best it could be, and therefore had no time
- for anything that didn't contribute in a positive meaningful way. the
- following lines sorta stumbled out and i jotted them down onto a napkin.
- Later that night, they formally became a song, called "no time for tears."
well of course it is a sad thing, when the parent outlives the child or
when the child loses a father because a sickness has gone wild the pain can
be relentless in the shadow of the fears so as the hours become more
golden, we've got no time for tears
we got time for making music, time for making love time to talk about all
the things you're dreaming of time for mending fences with friends both far
and near but baby, this time around -- we've got no time for tears...
well of course it is a sad thing, to think about your death no one can
imagine taking their last breath so as the dark surrounds you, one thing
must be clear with every passing moment, we've got no time for tears
we've got time for making music+..
Not Why
- After finishing my first round of chemotherapy, I was recovering from
- feeling a little off-center and was glad about it. Then something hit me
- and, for the first time since surgery I cried out the angry "why" question.
- I remember being struck with how odd it would have seemed to others that I hadn't really asked it up until then. In the days following, I had two
- incredibly important conversations, one with my father and one with my
- pastor. Both led me to the same conclusion, which I tried to capture in this
- song.
There's really no reason asking why
bad things happen to us all
it's not like we'd understand the reasons anyway I mean, why did Humpty
Dumpty take his fall?
The question's not why, but What now?
the question's not why, but how? how to live, how to love How to give, of,
ourselves.
that's all that matters in the end
There's really no reason asking why
some folks act the way they do
it's not like you'll change their frame of mind I mean, you can't even
change their point of view
The question's not why, but what now
the question's not why, but how
how to speak, and respond
how to listen with love, then quietly move on
There's really no reason asking when
life will reach the finish line
nobody knows just how much sand
is in the hourglass of time
the question's not when, but what now
the question's not when, but how
how to see, each new day
as a gift, we, can't afford to waste away
Pray for the World
- Somewhere in the weeks following the surgery, I made the remark to leslie
- that 'it's a good thing people are praying for me, because I just realized
- I haven't been praying for myself.' I struggled with exactly how to do so,
- not quite certain if I could completely honestly sign up for 'thy will be
- done' since I felt so utterly unsure what His will is and that if it was
- His will that I should pass away a young man, I couldn't emotionally stand
- behind that yet with a pure and faithful heart. I later came to a series of
- reflections that helped me navigate through my prayer journey and, in the
- meantime, stumbled on some old lines I had written years ago which I had no problem finishing up. Doug and I now perform this song accapella and it's beauty lay in the simplicity.
Pray for the world and for each little child Pray for the world, for the
meek and the mild Pray for the world, for the lost and the wild Pray for
the world, and for you and for me
Pray for the world, for the soldiers who die Pray for the world, for the
mothers who cry Pray for the world, every time we ask why Pray for the
world, and for you and for me
Pray for the world, for the daughters and sons Pray for the world, that the
crippled will run Pray for the world, that His will may be done Pray for
the world, and for you and for me and for you and for me...
Friend in You
- This too is an older song revitalized for the times. I've essentially
- rededicated it to the host of friends, some of whom have come from nowhere as a complete surprise, who have helped me with some element of my new journey.
I have found a friend in you I never thought that I would find I have found
someone who hears the silent music in my mind and the painful prayers
within my soul
the haunting hopes within my heart
Yours is a love I've never known
It won't have an end, it never had a start
I have found a friend in you, One who will stay by my side I have found
someone who knows, just what it feels like to cry and what it feels like to
weep
what it feels like to mourn
Your love is what I want to keep
it will never die, it was never born
I must confess I do not understand
What keeps you holding my hand
But I am not so sure that it matters any more because believing is what
it's all about
I have found a friend in you, have you found a friend in me+
Not by Chance
- When Doug and I decided to start playing together and figured out why we
- were still given the opportunity to play and where it was we needed to play
- and the messages that we needed to project in our songs, Doug came up with the title for 'the band' to be 'not by chance.' I don't know if any other
- band out there has ever called themselves that, but it struck me as an
- immediate winner for us; it's almost our entire message in 3 words;
- assuming you follow the logic.
Years ago when the world was new
Angels learned a simple dance
Every time a dream comes true
They laugh and whisper "not by chance"
Heaven is full of promises
Earth is full of circumstance
Somewhere in between is where
Love comes to us, not by chance
Not by chance, i know it's true
not by chance, me and you
not by chance this life we live
not by chance this love we give
Let me look you in the eye
Just this once, a second glance
You will see that we are here
By design, and not by chance
Maybe
- This song came about by simply pondering a wide collection of thoughts and notions and seeking some meaning behind them all, wondering in the end if the answers really aren't that complicated.
Maybe this world was meant to break your heart maybe our pain is just part
of the plan
maybe our tears mean much more than we can know maybe these are thing we
cannot understand
Maybe this journey is simpler than is seems But maybe there is more than
meets the eye who can say what the raindrops hear when they fall maybe they
hear the soil singing love songs to the sky
maybe our heroes fail more often than we know maybe we care too much about
perfection
maybe the compass of our heart is pointing southward maybe we care too much
about direction
maybe you're a friend of mine, maybe you're a brother maybe you're my
touchstone as the winds of change blow through maybe in the end, all we
have is one another maybe that's god's answer to the hearts that break in
two
Eyes of the Heart
- doug and I were practicing the other day and i said something about the
- heart's horizon being a place most people couldn't see and he looked at me
- and said "eyes of the heart" and it took off from there. This song is one
- that today lives only in words as we have not yet begun to tackle the
- musical arrangement - and who knows, maybe we won't. It's something about the mysterious rebirth that's possible when you look for it in the right
- way-- i think.
There are places in our live we all need to get to There are spaces to
holy, they seem to be unreal But these echoes from the soul, remind us we
are mortal To move beyond ourselves, we all must learn to feel
And the eyes of the heart can see past the horizon way past anyplace you can go
Won't find it on a map, can't stop for directions But Where you leave and
arrive are both called home
There are things in our lives we think we must hold on to But like castles
in the sand, they all get washed away There's nothing you can keep, nothing
you can carry Except the sound that life makes at the dawn of each new day
And the eyes of the heart...
There are people in our lives we need to have around us People who will
love us without condition or regret But there's only room for one on this
journey you are facing Just because you go alone doesn't mean you must
forget
and the eyes of the heart...
I am looking
- A new tumor-friend on the Internet, Susan, was going through a particularly rough time. As I thought about her situation, I remembered a song i wrote several years ago as a college senior - it was a goofy time in my life when i was struggling with what i thought were all the big questions, and one day i realized that regardless, there were people around me who were my friends and had always been and would always be, and this discovery, while simple, was profound. So I sent this along to her in the hopes she might find some comfort in the words+.it's called "I am Looking"
I am looking for a smile behind your eyes I am looking for the freedom to cry
don't try to give me answers, they make no sense to me I'll find more
meaning in a travesty
I am looking for a dream that will not die I am looking for the day to walk
away from a goodbye Don't drag me to the threshold, I know I will not cross
I feel more confident when I know I'm lost
I stay away from one way roads
you know I do not mind the heavy loads
But I do appreciate your taking the time To listen to me, and be my friend
I am looking for the wisdom of a king
I am looking for the silence that will teach me how to sing Don't tell me
what I should do, don't tell me where I should go In all honesty I'd say
neither of us knows
I stay away from one way roads
you know I do not mind the heavy loads
But I do appreciate your taking the time To listen to me, and be my friend...
Yes I do appreciate your taking the time To listen to me, and be my friend...
Never Noticed
- In August 1996, leslie and I were given a very special anniversary getaway
- by some dear friends at church: a horse-drawn carriage tour, dinner, an
- historic bed and breakfast, all on the house. someone watched the kids for
- the night and we didn't pay a dime. it was the single best anniversary
- we've ever had. In the middle of that night, however, i woke up at an
- insane hour (as usual) unable to sleep, and sat on the bedroom floor while
- leslie slept and penned the following song. I was in the midst of a series
- of new discoveries about the world around me, discoveries which I hope
- never to lose again: a realization of how much the noise and rush of my
- past life had blocked me from seeing and loving everything that really
- mattered to me. I know you have similar insights as well+
I know this tree in my front yard didn't get more green in a day I know
these voices in my head didn't just now learn to pray I know it took more
than a dream to turn this sword into a plow I guess I never noticed it till
now
why must it take an eternity
to understand we could always see
open your eyes, what you will find
my friends has been there all the time
I know these children at my feet didn't just now learn to talk I know this
woman by my side has been stronger than a rock though I've frequently been
lost, their love has stayed with me somehow I guess I never noticed it till
now
why must it take..
I know the God who made the world, and every living thing Is a god of peace
and wonder who loves to dance and sing From the flower to the mountain,
it's to Him they bow I guess I never noticed it till now
I guess I never noticed it till now
MRI moments
- This is a simple poem written after my first MRI at duke university. If
- you've had an MRI, at least some of this should make sense. i figured there
- couldn't have been too many poems written about such an experience, so i
- tried.
clock. clock. click-clock. Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr there's a stillness
in the noise
like the eye of the storm
this monster machine
my personal cacophony
surrounding me in my metallic womb
somewhere beyond, the images form
like a sculpture, a blueprint
of all that's unseen
the good and the bad become one in a
black and white photo of flesh and bone
bone and blood
blood and spirit
spirit and life
this orchestra of noise is my bridge
to glimpses of healing
i can only believe
have begun
late-nite words
- Just what the title says+nothing more or less. Sort of a litany to myself,
- I guess.
don't bend
don't break
don't fear
don't give-up
don't relent
don't dismay
don't dread
don't doubt
don't cower
don't tremble
don't quake
don't shrink
don't cringe
don't wince
don't flinch
don't worry
don't cry
don't stop
don't stop
don't stop
protect
defend
hope
believe
fight
shield
cover
preserve
insulate
guard
fortify
resist
combat
defy
oppose
battle
struggle
confront
join
challenge
repel
fight
fight
fight
win