Hormones are Scary


... at least I think it's the hormones. Maybe it's sleep deprivation. Or some kind of Alien invasion? Like that time that those aliens put that invisible thing on Janeway's head to give her a headache and see how far they could *push* her ... I think maybe those aliens are here now. Can anyone remind me how they noticed them and made them stop? I think I need a binary star system or something.

Anyway ... I don't want to complain, but to comment on how scary things like hormones and sleep deprivation can be. I have NOT felt myself the last two days ... sometimes I feel fine, but when things bother me it's like they mushroom out of control inside me, like a giant raging monster that grew from a speck to colossal in just a few moments. I think I wrote a little vignette about it, once ... oh, I guess it's not on my blog anywhere, so I won't try to link to it. Probably better anyway.

So I'm living with this monster stuffed down under my skin. Sometimes if I open my mouth, you can see it and hear it. By God's grace I haven't totally let it OUT, but what you see just from my too-big mouth is ugly enough. It is a good exercise in humility, I guess, to have to ask forgiveness for the glimpses that have been visible. And an exercise in thankfulness that the whole thing has stayed mostly-stuffed.

So what am I doing about it? Trying to remember to pray and ask for God's help, especially when I don't feel like it. Trying to eat healthy. Drinking that icky Red Raspberry Leaf Tea that's supposed to help. Maybe I'll work some flax into my diet, those Omega-3's are supposed to help, too ... and I'm going to make sure I get some kind of nap this afternoon ...

It does make for a long day, though.

Posted: Mon - May 9, 2005 at 11:55 AM          

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