On Saturday, after wandering around the Marais for a while, where I bought a f.off pair of Italian leather boots and a €130 Cavalli belt (despite not even being gay), we went to the Lizard Lounge - described in some circles as the best bar in the world - where most of our group drank pink mojitos, though I eventually settled on a French vanilla martini.

Hmmm...

It's full of the 'turtle neck' Anglophile French men who only pounce on the women once their men are in the loo

May have happened, who knows? I was in the loo at the time.