Stupid Republican Criminals
I am well aware that the title of this post
contains a double redundancy. It is also one of those rare phrases that can be
written in any order and retain the same meaning. However, the phrase has a
special meaning today, as Josh Marshall has drawn the world's attention
to the guy who must claim the title of being the world's Stupidest Republican
criminal. The person who has claimed that dubious distinction, the person who
has beat out some world class competition, is one Todd Shriber, the now former (since Josh's post?) Director of
Communications for Congressman Denny Rehberg, a Montana Republican (what
else?).
It seems Todd didn't do too well at his alma mater (Texas Christian University). It occurred to him that it might be a good idea to get a retroactive increase in his grades so he went to a computer geek website named attrition.org for some assistance. In his own words:
OK here it is: I need an adjustment to my college GPA.
Is this an absurd request?
He was assured that it was not, and the fun began.
The entire email exchange between Todd and his tormentors is reproduced here . They played him like a fiddle, warning him every step of the way that what he was asking was criminal and that they could all end up in jail. (Had the hackers actually had any intention of doing what he wanted).
Now, you're probably thinking, yes, that's pretty stupid, putting yourself in the power of a complete stranger. But that's not the half of it. Here's is part of the email exchange (non squirrel/pigeon stuff redacted, to improve the flow):
Shriber: What would you or anyone else need from me to see if you could it?
Hacker: For starters, college name, full name, and whatever number they track you by. Student ID or SS# or whatever else.
And, are there pigeons on campus?
Shriber: I can supply all that. Forgive what I assume is dumb question, but what are pigeons? I know you're not talking about the bird.
Hacker: Actually I am.
Shriber: Wow, I feel dumb now. I honestly cannot rember if there were pigeons on campus or not. A lot of crazy squirrels, but I can't remember pigeons. Just for my own edification, why do you need to know that? I'll find out for you.
Hacker: Hey, squirrels work fine. First, let's be clear. You are soliciting me to break the law and hack into a computer across state lines. That is a federal offense and multiple felonies. Obviously I can't trust anyone and everyone that mails such a request, you might be an FBI agent, right?
So, I need three things to make this happen:
1. A picture of a squirrel or pigeon on your campus. One close-up, one with background that shows buildings, a sign, or something to indicate you are standing on the campus.
Shriber: OK. The pictures might take me a little while as I've been out of school for a few years and I don't live in that state anymore.
Hacker: What state do you live in, and what college is it? The picture can still work wherever you are. Main thing is to prove to a degree who you are, that you can do something unique and quickly, etc.
Shriber: I don't live near the college anymore, I'm 1,000 miles away. Is there some other sign of trust I can extend to you or should I wait a few weeks and travel to my school and get these pictures?
Hacker: A picture of a squirrel or pigeon near where you live is fine. One close up, one from the distance enough so there are buildings or anything to help identify the location of where the pic was taken from.
And yes, he did go out and take a picture of a squirrel and sent it to the hacker. And the above is only the start of the correspondence about squirrel pictures. It goes on and on. By the way, the hacker apparently had no idea who Todd was. You almost feel sorry for the guy. Here's the last email they sent him:
todd... no more.. omfg we are SO busted.. fuck fuck fuck FUCK FUCK everything was PERFECT until their night noc ran a reverse udp traceroute back to one of the hosts we had set up after that, straight DOWNHILL. i've already been called twice by my isp asking about unusual activity, some other shit about access attempts to a federally monitored system they have everything in logs including the rot-26 stuff that finally got me access all goes back to your login sorry i really fucked up BAD
theyre prob gonna end up calling you since they have your info just duck and run if you can, i'm going deep underground if they ask about me or attrition we don't know each other you know youre just as guilty and liable so when they come knocking dont say anything without a lawyer and when you ask them to put the gun down say it nice because that shit isnt fun
man dont even visit attrition.org again theyre trying to check web logs one last email should be ok but we're so fucked sorry
Poor Todd. That must have cost him a heap of sleepless nights.
To conclude, there may be Republicans stupider than Todd, and there may be Republicans more criminal than Todd, but I submit that Todd is the Stupidest Republican Criminal of them all.
It seems Todd didn't do too well at his alma mater (Texas Christian University). It occurred to him that it might be a good idea to get a retroactive increase in his grades so he went to a computer geek website named attrition.org for some assistance. In his own words:
OK here it is: I need an adjustment to my college GPA.
Is this an absurd request?
He was assured that it was not, and the fun began.
The entire email exchange between Todd and his tormentors is reproduced here . They played him like a fiddle, warning him every step of the way that what he was asking was criminal and that they could all end up in jail. (Had the hackers actually had any intention of doing what he wanted).
Now, you're probably thinking, yes, that's pretty stupid, putting yourself in the power of a complete stranger. But that's not the half of it. Here's is part of the email exchange (non squirrel/pigeon stuff redacted, to improve the flow):
Shriber: What would you or anyone else need from me to see if you could it?
Hacker: For starters, college name, full name, and whatever number they track you by. Student ID or SS# or whatever else.
And, are there pigeons on campus?
Shriber: I can supply all that. Forgive what I assume is dumb question, but what are pigeons? I know you're not talking about the bird.
Hacker: Actually I am.
Shriber: Wow, I feel dumb now. I honestly cannot rember if there were pigeons on campus or not. A lot of crazy squirrels, but I can't remember pigeons. Just for my own edification, why do you need to know that? I'll find out for you.
Hacker: Hey, squirrels work fine. First, let's be clear. You are soliciting me to break the law and hack into a computer across state lines. That is a federal offense and multiple felonies. Obviously I can't trust anyone and everyone that mails such a request, you might be an FBI agent, right?
So, I need three things to make this happen:
1. A picture of a squirrel or pigeon on your campus. One close-up, one with background that shows buildings, a sign, or something to indicate you are standing on the campus.
Shriber: OK. The pictures might take me a little while as I've been out of school for a few years and I don't live in that state anymore.
Hacker: What state do you live in, and what college is it? The picture can still work wherever you are. Main thing is to prove to a degree who you are, that you can do something unique and quickly, etc.
Shriber: I don't live near the college anymore, I'm 1,000 miles away. Is there some other sign of trust I can extend to you or should I wait a few weeks and travel to my school and get these pictures?
Hacker: A picture of a squirrel or pigeon near where you live is fine. One close up, one from the distance enough so there are buildings or anything to help identify the location of where the pic was taken from.
And yes, he did go out and take a picture of a squirrel and sent it to the hacker. And the above is only the start of the correspondence about squirrel pictures. It goes on and on. By the way, the hacker apparently had no idea who Todd was. You almost feel sorry for the guy. Here's the last email they sent him:
todd... no more.. omfg we are SO busted.. fuck fuck fuck FUCK FUCK everything was PERFECT until their night noc ran a reverse udp traceroute back to one of the hosts we had set up after that, straight DOWNHILL. i've already been called twice by my isp asking about unusual activity, some other shit about access attempts to a federally monitored system they have everything in logs including the rot-26 stuff that finally got me access all goes back to your login sorry i really fucked up BAD
theyre prob gonna end up calling you since they have your info just duck and run if you can, i'm going deep underground if they ask about me or attrition we don't know each other you know youre just as guilty and liable so when they come knocking dont say anything without a lawyer and when you ask them to put the gun down say it nice because that shit isnt fun
man dont even visit attrition.org again theyre trying to check web logs one last email should be ok but we're so fucked sorry
Poor Todd. That must have cost him a heap of sleepless nights.
To conclude, there may be Republicans stupider than Todd, and there may be Republicans more criminal than Todd, but I submit that Todd is the Stupidest Republican Criminal of them all.
Posted: Friday - December 22, 2006 at 05:20 PM
Quick Links
Statistics
Total entries in this blog:
Total entries in this category:
Published On: Apr 17, 2007 07:20 PM
Total entries in this category:
Published On: Apr 17, 2007 07:20 PM