There's nothing like being out of the country to make news about America seem interesting. While most years, Deb and I have a reasonable interest in the outcome of our national elections, we are not so interested that we care to stay up until late in the night to hear the results. If the election isn't decided by 11 PM, we can wait until the next morning to read about it in the Boston Globe.

Here it's different. First, because everyone agreed the election would be close there was much more of an element of excitement about learning the outcome. Second, because as much as we are ambivalent about Al Gore, we dread the thought of George Bush becoming president. And finally, because there are only a few North Americans at the school, we are always hungry for news from home.

Then there is the added element of intrigue. China blocks access to virtually every news service on the Internet. For weeks after our arrival, we tried checking the N. Y. Times website and consistently, after 2 or 3 minutes of waiting, a message would come back that "The server is not accepting connections at this time. Please try again later." Like a naive teenage boy told by a prospective date that his invitation was refused because she is washing her hair, we *would* try again later, with the same results.

But a tip from a computer-savvy friend in the US (thanks, Phil) combined with several days of Internet searching, has resulted in not one, but three separate ways to get past the news roadblocks set up by the Chinese government. Some are more convenient, some work faster than others, but on any given day, you can generally get to what you want. (This knowledge has been of great interest to the Chinese teachers we have met. As word of the technique spreads I have been getting more and more requests for the web address that allows access to CNN, BBC and all the other forbidden sources of information.)

Since we have the best computer setup among the foreigners, Deb got the idea of having an Election Day party at our apartment. We invited the other two North American couples; we all live in the same building and we get together frequently. Picking the time for the party was a little tricky. Taking into account the time difference between the US and China, we figured that the polls on the East Coast would be closing around breakfast time and that news coverage would begin in earnest around then. But by lunch time, the West Coast would be done voting and it was highly likely that no winner would emerge until that time. So to make sure that we'd have some excitement with our meal (little did we know...), we decided on a lunchtime potluck.

For the occasion I moved our iBook into the living room and set up the auxiliary speaker system around the big color TV. Deb planned to make a tropical fruit salad and a big pot of rice. Michael and Leslie offered to bring the main course. And of course, we had plenty of cold beer so that we could either celebrate properly or drown our sorrows.

On the big day, I started off before breakfast making sure that we could get a good Internet news connection. Murphy's Law, and about 50 million other people with the same idea, made this more difficult than I expected. My first plan was to get coverage from NPR, but going to the website I got a new variation on the "washing my hair" brush-off when, immediately after connecting, I was told that there were too many connections and I was getting bumped.

This was no time to be put on the waiting list, so I headed over to CNN. There, my connection was accepted, but s-l-o-w-l-y. Loading a single page took upwards of 20 minutes! Luckily, once I got the audio rolling, I could ignore everything else on the site, so the slowness of the screen update was not a big problem.

Deb was putting together the fruit salad as the election results began coming in. CNN was being extremely optimistic about Gore's chances. As each Northeastern state was awarded to Gore, the commentators went on about how it would be increasingly difficult for Bush to put together the necessary electoral votes. Around the time that Deb realized that she forgot to buy bananas, CNN announced that Gore had won Florida and suggested that his ultimate victory was virtually inevitable.

The need to complete the salad, combined with the desire to broadcast the news, drove Deb out of the apartment. On her way to the market, she managed to let about half of the English-speaking population of Bailongsi know that our next president would be Al Gore. Two hours earlier, she had been sick with the thought that we might have a barely literate ex-jock in the White House. Now her greatest concern was that by lunchtime the whole election drama would be old news.

But she was not alone; we were all getting a little giddy with excitement. Michael, consulting with us about the lunch menu, kept suggesting more and more plates of food. As the meal became increasingly elaborate I realized that he and Leslie would not be cooking, they would be picking the food up at a nearby restaurant. This was going to be another first for me - eating Chinese take-out food in China!

Allegra and Evan, the other couple, arrived back from their morning classes. They had been hearing that Bush had already won the election. We assured them that this was not true and that the opposite was even more likely. Allegra, while ideally wishing to see Nader as president, was nonetheless relieved and Evan, though Canadian and having no direct interest in the outcome, was equally happy to hear that we had not yet put a man in the Oval Office with poorer English skills than many of his students.

So now the whole crowd was assembled. Michael came back with box after box of take-out, Leslie came down with their three-year old son Walker (who, only a day earlier, declared George Bush to be dumber than Dan Quayle - wisdom from the mouths of babes), and we settled in using all of our available furniture, and borrowed bowls and chopsticks, to listen to the play-by-play.

It was probably after the first round of beers that things began to look less rosy. Bush started winning *lots* of Western states. Frankly, I don't care much about what goes on in the minds of the good citizens of Wyoming, or Montana, or Utah, but when they all start voting for the opponent, I begin to pay attention. Then CNN took back Florida, the key to the Gore victory. It seemed like a good time to pour a second round of beers.

This, along with the fruit salad, helped to lighten the mood considerably. But it was becoming clear that nothing was going to be settled soon. The consensus seemed to be that as long as the food and beer held out, who cares? If that nearby restaurant did take-out, they'd probably deliver too. It's true that some of the assembled crew needed to teach that afternoon, but that seemed like a distant obligation. I had visions of the waiban (foreign affairs office) knocking on our door sometime on Thursday, trying to figure out what had happened to all of us, entering the room to see piles of greasy food boxes and empty beer bottles, and hearing CNN still announcing the latest projections.

But even before that could happen, we had Chinese company when our cleaning lady arrived. Deb explained to Housao, who speaks no English, that we were in the process of electing our next president, but I don't think that she really believed that that could account for the level of excitement in the room. We were hanging on each electoral vote, frantically forcing the web page to update so that we could get the overall picture of states in each candidate's column, panicking as network traffic turned the announcer's comments into warbley voices from the bottom of the ocean.

Amidst this chaos, Housao valiantly mopped the floors (normally, we leave the room so that she can go about her duties unencumbered by our presence; this time, it was all we could do to pull our feet up off the floor and onto our chairs) and somehow, Walker managed to fall into a blissful sleep. We began to wonder how this would ever be resolved. More and more states were "too close to call." Deb realized that she was going to have to go off to her 4:00 class without knowing the results.

She momentarily walked into the kitchen to grab a bottle of water. At that instant, CNN announced that George Bush had won Florida, and by extension, the presidency. Deb hadn't heard this, but when she walked back to the living room, she said the look on everyone's face told her that something terrible had happened. I don't think any of us had seriously considered this highly likely outcome until we heard the news.

Deb went off to teach, as did Evan, and slowly, everyone else filed out of the room. It was just me and CNN as I waited for Gore's concession speech. Of course, everyone knows now that it wasn't that simple.

For the next couple of days, we updated each other with the latest Florida vote counts. I'd check the Internet each morning and Evan would get his news from the shortwave. But now the developments have slowed to the point where we can get most of our information from the nightly English language newscast on CCTV.

Election disputes are a staple news story for China Central Television. Since we've been here, we have had reports on both the elections in Yugoslavia and the Ivory Coast. In each case, one candidate is certified as the winner, and the other, challenging the results, claims that the will of the people has been subverted by a fraudulent voting process. Hearing about the latest stolen election gives me a strong sense of deja vu: America is sounding like just another banana republic.

It's time to crack open another beer.