Jen the Boater
You wouldn't think that a girl whose hands fall off in a stiff breeze would be all up in a kayak, would you?

   

It was this or carry them by hand. We cheated and used the car.
The mighty P-9 with Pungo and Manitou cargo.
The SS P-9 sets sail with Captain Yoshi at the helm.
North Beach. From the English meaning, "beach what is in the north."
It's real purty here.
We got beaches.
And water.
And hot boater babes.
There was a problem with the life vest. Well 2 problems, actually.
Life vest 1, Jen's tits, 0.
Look Ma! I'm paddlin'!
And away she went.
Out into the harbor...
past the sailboats...
out towards the middle of the lake...
where she was eaten by Champ.
(Note to Karen and Sharon: Kidding.)
See? No lake monsters. Well, one lake monster, one hot boater babe.
Behold! Defensible Tower of Common Sense!
Lake Champlain, VT.
But wait, there's more.
Many many people went kayaking that day.
Captain Yoshi commandeered the Manitou...
and sailed off into the sunset.
Kind of.
Not a moaning homeless man.
Also not a moaning homeless man.
Vast tracks of beach. Not pictured: moaning homeless man.
Sunset over the Burlington waterfront.
Hail, Triumphant Conquerors! Who have conquered, um, sunset, I think.
Across the lake, the Adirondack Mtns, markedly not Green, and not VT.
Don't fuck with me. Even without the cloak.
Boat porn.