My
wife is from Thailand and she has seen the History of Civilization. Working
her way into the world from a poor upcountry farming community, she has
seen everything from the Iron Age to the Post Modern. She has planted
rice paddies, and she has met Warren Buffett and the Prince of Bhutan.
Her latest adventure began in January 2007, when she moved to the US with
me.
Who are you?
Who am I? What can I say? I come from Thailand, but I'm also
Lao. How can I explain? I'm more Lao than Thai.
What do you mean?
I'm from Thailand but my ancestors are from Laos. So,
I can speak Lao and Thai, and a little bit of English. Lao is my first
language.
Why do you make the distinction?
Lao people are more peaceful. They don't
fight each other as much as Thais do. Thai people, especially in Bangkok,
only want to be rich. They never get enough.
How do you like the US so far?
I love the US. It's a new opportunity for
work. I have to say thank you to my husband for bringing me here. [Gives
a smarmy smile.]
You worked in Thailand. What's the difference?
In Thailand I worked at
a very exclusive five-star hotel. It was very expensive but not good quality.
Like a bowl of bad soup. They make it look good with a nice garnish on
top but under that there is no flavor. It wasn't comfortable for me. I'm
too straight and I don't like to play social games with people. Most jobs
in Thailand are full of petty social games. Now in the US, people are very
straight. Every one is equal. No one looks down on me for who I am. In
Thailand, because I'm from Isaan, they look down on me and I have to work
harder than everyone else. Here I can be myself and do what I want to do.
I love both countries the same really. In a way, Thailand made me strong.
I learned to be independent in Thailand. I had to fight for it. Now, here,
it's easy to be independent, and my independent nature is an advantage
instead of a problem.
Is the US different than you expected?
I thought it would be very difficult
to stay here. To talk with people. To find a job. Especially, my husband's
family is opposite from what I thought. They are very sweet, very nice
to me. When I was a little girl, I went to work at the farm and my parents
had to bring food for me. Now, my father-in-law does the same. Once, when
we were going to go see a mountain, he worried a lot about me and brought
food for me. I was very impressed. They are very nice and show me a lot
of love. When I came here, I brought luck with me. It was very easy to
find a job here. When I interviewed for it, I was honest and truthful and
they were too.
Are American people different than expected?
Back in Thailand, I saw a
lot of bad foreigners. Many of them had a lot of girlfriends, and spent
every night going to bars. But here they're very straight. Only one wife.
They love their family and they're honest. So I gained a lot of respect
for them. In fact, I didn't respect them before. Tourists behave badly
in Thailand. Some are good, but most are bad.
What is something you like better in the US than
in Thailand?
I don't
want to talk bad about my country, but Americans are more straightforward
and honest. And they drive very nice. They follow the rules. And if you
need help, people are always happy to help you without asking for payment
or anything in return.
What is something that Thailand does better?
The most important things
are cheap there and even free. It's easy to find food anytime, anywhere.
It just grows on trees. Very great food and very cheap. In my village I
don't even need money. Or just a little bit for extra things like pork
or beef, if we want. In addition to growing rice, my family keeps a small
farm for growing our own food. We have chickens, ducks, eggs, vegetables.
We only need money for luxuries like electronics. In the last five years,
people have started wanting mobile phones and TVs, so we use money for
that. Another thing, and this was a big surprise for me: I work at a hospital
now, but I don't like American hospitals. Because I see sick people, dying,
and dead people passing me almost everyday and it makes me sad. I cant
help them, even the doctor can't help them. The quality of care is much
better in Thailand. In a Thai hospital the doctors are very friendly, care
a lot about the patient, always come to check and ask how they feel. When
you're hurt, they come right away. Very important for a patient. If you
go to the emergency ward in Thailand, fifteen minutes would be a long wait.
Usually you get treatment right away. Here, I went to the ER because cleaning
chemicals splashed in my eye. I went to the ER at 7:30pm. Though I couldn't
see, I had to fill in forms for 30 minutes. The nurse kept telling me the
doctor was coming, but I had to wait two hours. No one even tried to wash
my eye. The doctor finally came and looked at my eye. He talked a bit and
was gone again. 40 minutes later he came back with a machine to check my
eye. Then he gave me some eyedrops and that was it. Thailand has much better
hospitals.
Has it been difficult to get used to life in the
US?
No. Because I'm really
straight. I always say what I want to say, and that fits in well in the
US. In Thailand, if you don't like somebody you cannot say it. You'd die
right away! Here, you can say it very easily and they don't care.
What is the biggest change you have had to make?
I have to study English,
but I didn't really have to change myself at all. I still love my religion.
I always pray to Buddha and my Buddha is always inside my heart. So this
makes me peaceful anytime, anywhere I go.
How
is the weather?
OH! It's COLD! But that's a good thing. People can't
drink outside and stay on the street. In Thailand they can sit on the street
drinking. That's trouble for women walking alone.
The food?
Oh, man! Too much meat. Too much cheese. Too much frozen food.
I don't like it.
Are you able to find the things you liked back in
Thailand here in the US?
Mostly. There is some good food here if you can cook. Fresh vegetables
and meat are here if you look for them. So I can make Thai food for myself.
It's not the same as Thailand, but close enough.
If you had a friend send something from Thailand,
what would you want?
I want fermented fish sauce for making somtam (spicy green papaya salad),
and a bag of sticky rice. Also I'd want some Thai magazines and books.
What is your favorite American food?
Only one I can love very much: barbecue
pork ribs. That's it!
Is there any food you can get in America that you
can't get in Thailand?
Oh! A new thing is I love eating artichokes with my husband.
What is your favorite American TV show?
Oh! (Laughs) I love judge shows.
Especially Judge Judy. She's very great. I love to watch her. She's so
strong, smart, and she says whatever she wants to say to deal with people.
We don't have this kind of program in Thailand. I think the people in Thailand
have no idea what judges do. They know when they go to the court, I guess,
but regular people from Isaan never do.
What do you like to do on your days off?
Me and my husband always go to
the park, to the lake, bicycling. Because I like to see wild animals, deer,
rabbits, skunks, squirrels, ducks, birds, natural things. It's very nice.
You can even drink the water from the rivers. In my country, you can't
see these things anymore. When you go to the mountains you can't hear anything,
because people have killed most of the animals. When I was a girl, we had
to go to bed early - around 6pm - because if you walk around at night in
the village, you'll run into tigers and elephants and dangerous animals.
It was easy to find the food then. For example, we could walk to the farm
and find fish jumping in the field, clams, crabs, frogs. Easy to find.
Just reach out and grab it. Walk through the rice field and you can find
anything you want. But now they're gone. You cannot see any crabs or frogs
in the fields. It's very difficult to find them. I think because they use
a lot of chemicals. And people cut a lot of trees for planting corn or
other things. Without the trees, it doesn't rain. The hot season is very
dry. The rainy season there's flooding. Oh, and I forgot. I love to go
digging clams and picking blueberries here! Poor clams!
Tell
me about the driving. Which country is safer?
Here it's very safe.
They follow the rules of the road. In Thailand we don't follow the rules,
but we drive very well. There's a lot of accidents in Thailand, but we
know better how to deal with them. Here, the drivers don't know how to
react when there is an accident. If one car makes a mistake, everybody
crashes. In Thailand we are always ready for accidents and react quickly.
If Americans tried to drive in Thailand, they wouldn't live long.
What is something you miss about Thailand?
I miss my parents. I always
think about when I was a little girl and it was easy to find food. Makes
me sad that now they have to work hard and spend more money on everything,
just to live. It's because people have gotten lazy. They use machines for
everything. Machines use oil and oil uses money. Before, we used only buffalo,
and made enough for what we needed. Now people are lazy, buying machines
with loans from the bank - you have to pay more money, buy gas, fix the
broken machines, spend more money. Now Japan is rich because Thais are
buying machines from them. Even my dad uses a small tractor from Japan.
What is something in Thailand that you're glad to
get away from?
I won't
miss going to government offices. They're very rude to me. Because they
saw my family name changing to American, they think I'm a bad person. They
don't like women marrying with foreigners.
What's next for your future? Will you ever go back
to Thailand?
For now
I don't think about going back. I'd like to visit sometime. Actually I'd
really like to buy a house in Laos. Just a small place. It's not expensive
there. I like the people. Very nice, helpful, friendly. The don't care
about being rich. They are proud of what they have.
