The Hanson Family
Missionaries with Common Global Ministries to San Pedro Sula, Honduras
A Sense of Humor OUR SECRET FOR SUCCESS... |
| Language Confusion.... |
Learning a new language is challenging. Here are some language mistakes to avoid. 1. The verb ordenar (to ordain)should not be confused with odeñar (to milk, as in a cow). The sentence "Yes, I think women ought to be ordained" takes on a whole new meaning if the wrong verb is used. 2. The word año (years) should not be confused with the word ano (anus). In Spanish, to ask someone their age, one says, "How many years do you have?" Again, with the wrong word, a completely different question is asked. 3. An expression regarding feeling full after a a good meal in Honduras is "I have to stand up so my food can slide down." We have many Pizza Huts here in San Pedro Sula, and they serve calzones, meat and cheese filled pizza pockets. However, in the local Spanish, calzones means women's panties. So, the sentence "I have to stand up so my calzones can slide down," leads to riotous laughter. 4. The word embarazado should mean embarrassed. It means pregnant. Take care with the sentence, Yo estoy embarazada (I am pregnant, not I am embarrassed). 5. The word asistir means to attend, not to assist. So, the sentences, pero yo no puedo asistir en la iglesia, which ought to mean "sorry, but I can't help at church" and which you think is a polite way to say you don't want to preach, really means "Sorry, I can't go to church." |
| Overheard at the Hansons..... |
Linda: Jesus may have washed the feet of the twelve disciples, but he never hand picked the lice nits out of the heads of twelve screaming children. Now that is humbling oneself as a servant! Bruce: Yeah,but somehow a Maundy Thursday nit picking service just wouldn't be as meaningful to people as the foot washing service, do you think? |
You
know you're in Honduras when....... |
-You have to drive dodging missing manhole covers.
-You are at a red light and all of a sudden you find that there are two
other cars next to you making one lane into three.
-You see a father bicycling his son to school.
-You see lots of people riding in the back of pick-up trucks.
-You are stopped every time you leave a store to double check the
contents of your bag against your receipt.
-A horse drawn cart filled with fruits and vegetables goes by your
neighborhood every morning selling their goods.
-Two boys come in a cart to collect your garbage and tell you they worked all morning in the factories and work at night collecting garbage. They are nine and ten and don't go to school.
-Adults or kids offer to watch your car while you go to the bank or to
pick up the kids at school. The Hondurans tell you it’s a good idea.
-You know what “Agua Azul” is.
-You ask for “guanabana” juice at a restaurant and you get
delicious freshly squeezed “sour sop” juice.
-You see beautiful tropical plants everywhere (birds of paradise,
hibiscus and others…)
-You are best friends with your plumber….
-You drive with one hand on the steering wheel and the other on the
horn.
-Your next door neighbor sells tacitos, pastellitos and enchiladas from her front porch, with homemade pickled cabbage and salsa. Yum!
Links:
You know where all the open manhole covers are, and dodge them without batting an eye.
You are the one making the three lanes out of one at the red light.
You have ridden two people
on a bike yourself.
You have personally driven a pickup truck filled with a whole pile of
people in the back, including children.
You tap the security guard on the shoulder when you are ready to exit the store so he can check your purchases against the receipt.
You know the names and ages of the kids who drive the horse drawn cart filled with fruits and vegetables that goes by each day, and the names and ages of the kids collecting garbage who come by.
You don't have to ask your Honduran
friends if you need to hire someone to watch your car. You know
the neighborhood well enough to decide for yourself.
You have the names of three plumbers on your cell phone speed dial.
You have had to take your car in to get the horn repaired.
You have a young woman in working in your house who cooks way better than the neighbor, so you get to eat great Honduran food every day.
One day a few weeks ago we came home to find the neighbors throwing sticks and rocks into the yard. One guy was perched on our nail studded security fence throwing 2 x 4s. We politely asked what the heck they thought they were doing. We thought they were tormenting our new puppy. It turns out they had seen this giant lizard monster fall off our roof and into the yard.
Sure enough, there was this huge lizard, probably about three and a half or four feet long, hissing and showing its sharp pointed teeth in the huge jaw that seemed to be designed for crushing small animals. These three rock-throwing guys were yelling that it was dangerous and would kill Sparkles, the puppy who was out in the yard.
Bruce valiantly snuck in and grabbed the dog and put him in the house, and one of the guys took a long stick and got the lizard to bite it, then snuck behind it and stepped on it, and grabbed it by the jaw, so it couldn't bite him. The whole time this thing is hissing and snapping these huge teeth and whipping this big tail around. Then they took it away, but not before I snapped a picture. Kind of far off, for good reason, but you get the idea. They called it a basilisk, just like the giant snake in the Harry Potter books! Here's the picture, which does not do it justice! The long thing hanging down is the tail......
