Overtime at the Arena
.................. |
| Dance for Success
The "staggering" number of attendees at the weekend's Arena Dance was unofficially 1100, and at ten bucks a head ensures paint, not food coloring, will again be used for the 8-foot of the curling rings next year. The drink tickets were gobbled up by thirsty islanders and mainlanders alike, offering 8 for $20, meaning the 250% markup should at least cover Ray Green's salary and some duct tape to hold the tennis net together.
 |
|
| |
|
|
|
Cliff Notes: Sober! |
| Those socializing at the dance who spoke with Clifford swear he was drinking water and exhibiting tremendous self-control. While he was still spotted stumbling into tables and double-fisted patrons, the profanities were scarce, and no one got asked for a loonie or a ride home, suggesting he was broke or thought the dance was Fri night and had a huge hangover. |
Organizers should be pleased with the overall results of Saturday's kick-off to summer partying. There were few fights, only a couple instances of dance-floor molestation, and not a needle was found in the bathroom toilets. This last fact may be due to the porceline bowls filled to capacity with Campbell's pea soup, a wallet, 3 unused TP rolls, a giant snake-like terd engraved with "Bubba Gord was here", and a tube sock with the heel out.  |
|
|
 |
| Week of April 26/04 |
| *** |
| Lawless Late-night |
A roadblock about a kilometer from the Sherose Island road disbanded early, unhindering many motorists en route to the Dance. By all accounts, the trip home was surprisingly cruisy as well, and the average of 17 post-Arena driving suspensions was drastically lower this year. This show of trust that the local law enforcement hinted at was overshadowed when one of the force's finest, a lovely scarlett-haired Newfie, was heard leaving the dance shouting, "Who wants to turn on my lights?"
 |
|
|
|
