Tue - July 29, 2008

Douchebag of liberty blames homeless hit and run on brain tumor


Robert Novak has a tumor? Or just a moral malignancy sitting on top of his spinal column?

Posted at 08:19 PM     Imagine it all  
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Fri - July 4, 2008

Lordy, lordy, look what we's free from today


Jesse Helms. Dead on the Fourth of July. How fitting to finally give this country a gift without Germanic overtones. A man who brought real meaning to what the liberal media is all about, considering his upbringing.

Posted at 05:47 PM     Imagine it all  
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Sat - April 19, 2008

Pope drops F-bomb at reconciliation meeting


I dreamt I was there with Bud Abbott, along with several Emmetts: Till, Grogan, Kelly, and Daniel, at Ebbett's field where several thousand faithful Catholic zombies pledged their imaginary faith to an imaginary God in hope of finding a real place in the imaginary afterlife.

Posted at 11:17 AM     Imagine it all  
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Sun - April 6, 2008

I'm a domain licensing man, like a wino


Now all I have to figure out is how to transfer the contents of this place to the oneminutepresident.com, yuyne1.com, drfaustroll.com, and uncommonlysensible.com.

Posted at 02:26 PM     Imagine it all  
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Wed - April 2, 2008

McCain considers Obama and Clinton as running mates


Wouldn't you?

Posted at 05:22 PM     Imagine it all  
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Sat - December 8, 2007

I can't wait until someone finally admits a lack of faith in Iowa caucasians!


In fact, I'm waiting for a general acknowledgment of a lack of faith in caucasians. What's there to trust? These people are assholes. You know them. You are probably even related to some of them. They've been fucking all the other people on the planet, literally and figuratively, and if they haven't fucked you yet, you're probably one of them, asshole.

Posted at 05:34 PM     Imagine it all  
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Sun - November 25, 2007

President Bush's Radio Address: November 24, 2007


The following is a pataphysically accurate transcript of the First Idiot's weekly radio address and national call to alms...

Posted at 10:48 AM     Imagine it all  
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Sun - September 2, 2007

Last night as I was getting ready for bed...


... a tropical depression that had formed in the Atlantic Basin was about to become a hurricane.

Posted at 06:04 PM     Imagine it all  
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