NIGRA APOLOGIZES: HYMIES UNFORGIVING
Leonine Bruce
The Portland Pataphysical Outpatient Clinic
July 26, 2001 04:59PM
The Portland Pataphysical Outpatient Clinic
July 26, 2001 04:59PM
PORTLAND (YU) – Portland School Board member
Sammy Davis III apologized Wednesday for pointing out the race and religion of
many elected officials in this backwater burg, but some demanded that the black
Hassidic convert atone for his remarks, and many militant Jews still demand his
resignation.
Davis refused to answer questions about suggestions that he step down.
Davis held his Wednesday news conference in front of the burned out shell of the old Burger Barn on Martin Luther King Blvd where Portland Police dumped dead possums in the 1980s to display how far the city had progressed from the days of racial intolerance when blacks were simply hanged on power poles when they wandered into white neighborhoods.
The exact text of Davis’s remarks remains unknown because his words were drowned out by the bullhorns of Jewish protestors calling for the removal of the board member’s genitals. Davis’s notes were snatched from the podium before he even finished his speech when unruly kikes in studded yarmulkes rushed the dreadlocked Davis.
In the scuffle that followed, several members of the Elite Mauve Leopards who serve as Davis’s bodyguards were injured while trying to shield him from stale matzos, cheap menorah, and Yiddish epithets hurled at the humbled educator by followers of one of the most brutal and vengeful Gods that man has ever known.
In interviews with The Oregonadian in early July, Davis told an Israeli intelligence officer that Jews tend to stick together, often to the exclusion of people of other races and religions.
Most elected sheenies in Portland declined to attend Davis’s news conference, preferring to watch the event on television at Temple Moshe Dayan in Northwest Portland, an area known for Jews, gays, brewers, entrepreneurs, and a distinct dearth of people of the darker epithelial hues.
“You know how they say you may not know what art is, but you can sure tell it when you see it?” said doyenne Mayor Vera Katz, “Well the same goes for sincere apologies. Mr. Davis’s statement isn’t the same as getting down on his knees and begging for his life. His future is now in the hands of the God of Abraham.”
Several prominent Jews who refused to give their names and only spoke on condition that their faces and voices be distorted through the Web cam of Lord Viper said they wouldn’t even pray for Mr. Davis.
© Copyright 2001, Faustroll, Ligi, and Associates. All Rights Reserved. The Portland Pataphysical Outpatient Clinic, Lounge and Laundromat, a leisure service of the Church of the Oven of Peace, provides imaginary solutions to your imaginary problems.
Leading the blind since 1896.
Davis refused to answer questions about suggestions that he step down.
Davis held his Wednesday news conference in front of the burned out shell of the old Burger Barn on Martin Luther King Blvd where Portland Police dumped dead possums in the 1980s to display how far the city had progressed from the days of racial intolerance when blacks were simply hanged on power poles when they wandered into white neighborhoods.
The exact text of Davis’s remarks remains unknown because his words were drowned out by the bullhorns of Jewish protestors calling for the removal of the board member’s genitals. Davis’s notes were snatched from the podium before he even finished his speech when unruly kikes in studded yarmulkes rushed the dreadlocked Davis.
In the scuffle that followed, several members of the Elite Mauve Leopards who serve as Davis’s bodyguards were injured while trying to shield him from stale matzos, cheap menorah, and Yiddish epithets hurled at the humbled educator by followers of one of the most brutal and vengeful Gods that man has ever known.
In interviews with The Oregonadian in early July, Davis told an Israeli intelligence officer that Jews tend to stick together, often to the exclusion of people of other races and religions.
Most elected sheenies in Portland declined to attend Davis’s news conference, preferring to watch the event on television at Temple Moshe Dayan in Northwest Portland, an area known for Jews, gays, brewers, entrepreneurs, and a distinct dearth of people of the darker epithelial hues.
“You know how they say you may not know what art is, but you can sure tell it when you see it?” said doyenne Mayor Vera Katz, “Well the same goes for sincere apologies. Mr. Davis’s statement isn’t the same as getting down on his knees and begging for his life. His future is now in the hands of the God of Abraham.”
Several prominent Jews who refused to give their names and only spoke on condition that their faces and voices be distorted through the Web cam of Lord Viper said they wouldn’t even pray for Mr. Davis.
© Copyright 2001, Faustroll, Ligi, and Associates. All Rights Reserved. The Portland Pataphysical Outpatient Clinic, Lounge and Laundromat, a leisure service of the Church of the Oven of Peace, provides imaginary solutions to your imaginary problems.
Leading the blind since 1896.
Posted: Thu - July 26, 2001 at 09:20 PM
Mark it:
Quick Links
Archives
Reddit Sucks Google Spew
Let's Roll!
XML/RSS Feed
Calendar
| Sun | Mon | Tue | Wed | Thu | Fri | Sat |
Categories
Statistics
Total entries in this blog:
Total entries in this category:
Published On: May 05, 2008 10:11 AM
Total entries in this category:
Published On: May 05, 2008 10:11 AM