Buzz wants in but I'm not sure that I'm going to let him in just yet. For one thing, he's been in and out maybe a dozen times this morning and I'm still mad at him over that lousy stock tip he gave me. I mean, what does a tabby cat know about tech stocks, for Pete's sake? What was I thinking? It's not like HIS portfolio has exactly taken off like a rocket in recent months. I guess I made the mistake of confusing aloofness with competence.
I'm not a dog person, having grown up with huge smelly, slobbering dogs in my formative years but I'm not so sure I'm a cat person at the moment. In and out, in and out, won't empty his cat box (claims it's because of the lack of opposable thumbs) and is slowly turning one of our chairs into something resembling a beige cotton ball. Plus the unfortunate substance abuse problem about which I posted to the OldTools list a while back...
From: Tom Price
To: OldTools
Esteemed Galoots,
We got a new cat a few weeks ago, a male tabby named Buzz. Buzz is a
pretty gonzo kitty and likes to pounce on the debris under my bench.
Night before last I was standing there trying to figure out how to get
the split nuts off of my recently acquired 16" Disston backsaw ($4 -
GLOAT) and I heard a slurping sound. I looked over the bench and Buzz was
knocking back some of the nasty rust-laden washing soda solution from my
electrolysis bath. (Yechhh! I get the dry heaves just thinking about it.)
I went nuts and went for Buzz like a shot. He looked up and split into
the dark recesses of the shop. I looked at the washing soda box and it
said to administer water or milk if ingested so that is what I did.
Fortunately, Buzz did not seem to have suffered any ill effects from his
little happy hour at the Electrolysis Bar & Grill. To prevent a repeat
performance, I put a lid on the plastic tub and weighted it down with a
heavy C-clamp. Tonight he strolled into the shop and made a beeline for
the tank. He then proceeded to try to pry the lid off the tank. He was
really concentrating on this task so I leaned over the bench and told him
to vamoose. He just looked up at me and I swear he was begging me to be a
pal and help him get into the sauce again. I went and got the Buzz
Get-The-Hell-Off-That squirt gun and hosed him down good. Finally he gave
up and headed up the stairs.
I think my shop cat has got a monkey on his back here. He's an
electrolysis bath solution junkie. He needs a stay at the Betty Ford
Clinic to dry out. Anyone else ever see this before?
****************************
Tom Price
Will Work For Tools
OK, I better get up and let the little miscreant in before he claws a hole in the screen. At least he's taken to visiting one of the neighbor's flower beds more than the basement litter box. Always a silver lining, my Grandmother used to say. Yep.
