Taliban Begins to Crumble

KABUL -- Afghanistan's Taliban regime last week began to fall under the pressure of the high-powered American military.

Northern Alliance rebels stormed several of the Taliban's stronghold cities, causing bursts of shaving, parties and viewing of pornographic material on the part of Afghan citizens. Meanwhile, Taliban soldiers retreated to the hills.

"We're not giving up or anything," one Taliban soldier said while sprinting from Kabul. "We just heard the mountains are nice this time of year."

U.S. officials said the efforts couldn't go better. The campaign continued despite the start of Ramadan, an Islamic holy month where followers fast during daylight hours to show submission to God. White House press secretary Ari Fleischer said the religious observance has no bearing over the U.S. bombings, or for that matter, the people of Afghanistan.

Critics say the U.S. should respect the religion by ceasing fire. Fleischer said Afghan Muslims will have no problem observing Ramadan fasting.

"These people have been fasting for years," he said. "They are P-O-O-R. It's hard to call it fasting when they have no food. What, are they going to cease from licking moss off of rocks from sun-up to sundown?"