A few years ago I used to play Unreal Tournament over the Internet with a bunch of people from work. Mostly we played Capture the Flag, which was a lot of fun and great for two teams, even two fairly large ones. I have some good memories of those games, and one really sticky catchphrase.

I don’t think the game makers (Epic Games) intended it to be a catchphrase, but it stuck with me anyway. What would happen is that the game would alert you to the presence of an enemy player carrying your team’s flag, using a deep male action-movie-preview voice, saying: “Enemy flag carrier…is here.” It meant heads up, you’re about to lose, you have an opportunity to reverse your fate. Quick! I don’t know why there was a pause before “is here”. It smacked of one of those voice-menu stitched-together phrases like, “You have…three…new messages”, but I don’t recall that the game ever said that anything else “…is here”.

Nevertheless I find my own brain wanting to use it all the time, in the presence of people who would have no clue to its context. At the Thanksgiving dinner table, setting down the turkey: “Enemy drumstick…is here.” Delivering a requested basket full of laundry: “Enemy laundry…is here.” Giving the kids their school lunches: “Enemy lunchbox…is here.” I prevent myself from giving voice to these proclamations because honestly, even my Unreal Tournament alumni probably wouldn’t get the reference without an intro at this point.

But it sure makes for a fun private soundtrack in my own head.

Enemy solipsism…is here.