The first list.

TOP TEN
GOOD THINGS ABOUT
ECE 340

10. USUALLY BETTER THAN DAYTIME T.V.

9. YOU’LL LEARN TO PUBLICLY DOWNPLAY THE IMPORTANCE OF GRADES.

8. YOU AND YOUR CLASSMATES WILL EXPERIENCE THAT CLOSE, BROTHERLY BOND THAT DEVELOPS BETWEEN PEOPLE TRAPPED IN A CAVE WITH THE AIR RUNNING OUT.

7. THOSE ZANY SWIVELING SEATS.

6. TEACHES YOU TO TAKE RAPID AND UNERRING DICTATION FOR 50 MINUTES AT A TIME.

5. WATCHING THE CLASS CLOWNS DIVEST THEMSELVES OF THEIR DIGNITY WITH THEIR INSIPID BANTER.

4. OBFUSCATING JARGON LEARNED IN CLASS WILL CONFUSE AND IMPRESS OUTSIDERS.

3. YOU’LL LEARN HOW TO USE AN ERASER—AND USE IT WELL.

2. OVERWHELMING AMOUNT OF THEORY HOMEWORK PREVENTS PAINFUL AND ANNOYING “CALCULATOR FINGER”.

1. YOU’LL NEVER BE FORCED TO DO THIS AGAIN UNLESS YOU ACTUALLY LAND A JOB DOING ELECTRICAL ENGINEERING, WHICH IS UNLIKELY.

Postscript
Oh, that item #1! Remember, humor + time = tragedy. The class was taught in the bottom of the Harvill building, where the classrooms were outfitted with these “zany swiveling seats” that were almost certainly an experiment in ergonomics from the 1960s. The seats had no legs; each rotated on the top of a single swing arm, a boom that connected to a pole anchored in the concrete floor and which also held up the desk in front of you. I suppose this made the seats impossible to steal. Kind of cool, but also distracting because I felt compelled to swivel the chair around the entire time. You would have done the same.