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Bargaining, Part I

Prologue

A big fat vampire runs through the cemetery. It’s surprisingly fast for something with its bulk. Spike is hot on its heels. Tara and Giles struggle to keep up with them. Spike slows to a stop when he reaches the fence at the edge of the cemetery. The vampire has vanished.

Spike looks back at Giles and Tara. “Come on! I’m never going to get anything killed with you lot holding me back.”

“I thought the big ones were supposed to tire more easily,” pants Tara.

“No, that’s over-the-hill shopkeepers,” says Spike.

Giles leans against a headstone. “I’m fine. I just need to— to die for a minute.”

Spike blames the powder Tara blew at the vamp for making it run off.

“It’s sobris-root,” says Tara. “It was supposed to confuse him, but it just kind of made him peppy. It’s not supposed to mix with anything. Do you think he might be taking prescription medication?”

“Yeah. That must be it,” says Spike.

“Good god,” laughs Giles. “I hope he doesn’t try to operate heavy machinery.”

“Yeah. We could all be in real—” Spike is cut off by Willow’s voice in his head. She warns them that the vampire has circled around, and is coming back toward them. She is standing on top of a high crypt, where she can see all of the cemetery. She tells them to drive the vampire toward the Van Elton crypt.

“Is that the one with the cute little gargoyle?” asks Tara.

They spot the vampire, and start toward it. It starts to run the wrong way. Giles throws the axe he’s carrying. It hits a tree right in front of the vampire’s nose. It turns around. Spike and Tara take off after it, and Giles goes to recover his axe first.

The vampire runs into a dead end. It looks around for a way out. It thinks it sees an escape route and runs toward it. It gets met by a fist in the face and falls to the ground. Buffy steps out and stands over it. “Big, fast, and dumb. Just the way I like ’em.”

The vampire tires to sit up, and Buffy kicks it in the head. She tries to stake it, but it catches her arm and punches her away. Giles and Tara grab its arms as it gets to its feet, and Spike punches it. The vampire hits Spike in the face with a head butt.

Xander and Anya hear the commotion and start toward it. Willow tells them to stop. Willow’s voice popping into Xander’s head kind of creeps him out, he wishes she wouldn’t do that. Anya thinks she should at least knock first. Willow doesn’t have time for that. She warns them that there’s another vampire lurking behind a nearby crypt, waiting to ambush them, and suggests that they go around the other way to get the jump on it.

The fat vampire throws off Giles and Tara. Buffy charges at it again. It grabs her and lifts her over its head. It swings her around, bashes Spike with her legs, and throws her at Tara. Willow warns Tara to duck, and Buffy goes sailing over her head and bounces off a headstone.

Giles swings his axe at the vampire. It catches the handle and swings Giles around against the fence. It pushes the handle against his throat.

Spike jumps onto the vampire’s back, and tries to get a choke hold on it. He gets hit in the face by an elbow from the vampire and falls back onto the ground. He gets to his feet and pulls his cigarettes and lighter from his pocket. He flips the lighter open.

“Spike!” chokes out Giles. Spike doesn’t move.

“What are you doing?” asks Willow. “Help him!”

Spike lights his cigarette. “I did.”

The vampire’s shirt tail is on fire. The flames quickly spread up its back. It releases Giles and staggers back as the flames consume it.

Giles gets covered in a rain of vampire ash, and coughs. “You might have let me in on your plan while he throttled me.”

“Poor Watcher.” Spike takes a drag from his cigarette. “Did your life pass before your eyes? Cup of tea, cup of tea, almost got shagged, cup of tea.”

Willow tells them that Xander and Anya need help.

The vampire has Xander in a head lock. Anya tries to move in to stake it, but she gets punched away, and lands on the ground. Buffy gives the vampire a kick in the head, and it releases Xander. He falls on top of Anya. Spike rushes at the vampire, and gets tossed on top of Xander and Anya.

Buffy knocks the vampire to the ground, and stakes it as it tries to get up again. “That’ll put marzipan in your pie plate, bingo!”

Giles, Tara and Willow help the others back to there feet. “What’s with the Dadaism, Red?” asks Spike.

“Yeah, she says that pie thing every time she stakes a vamp now,” says Tara.

Willow isn’t sure what’s wrong. “I was trying to program in some new puns, and I kind of ended up with word salad. It’s a glitch. I’ll fix it.”

“We just can’t have her messing up in front of the wrong person or the wrong thing,” says Giles. “We need the world and the underworld to believe Buffy is alive and well.”

“And I will therefore fix it,” says Willow. “I got her head back on, didn’t I? And I got her off those knock-knock jokes.”

“Oh, who’s there?” asks the Buffybot.

The group starts to walk out of the cemetery. “You know,” says Xander. “If we want her to be exactly—”

“She’ll never be exactly,” says Spike.

“I know,” says Xander.

“The only really real Buffy is really Buffy,” says Tara.

“And she’s gone,” says Giles.

“If we want her to be exactly she’ll never be exactly I know the only really real Buffy is really Buffy and she’s gone who?” asks the Buffybot.

Act I

Willow looks for her clogs under her bed. She and Tara have moved into Joyce’s old room in the Summers house. “I think there’s a clog-eating monster under the bed. It’s really those lesser-known monsters that make living in Sunnydale so hard.”

“I believe that is a Dawn monster,” says Tara. “She borrowed them yesterday.”

Willow knocks on the door into Dawn’s room, and opens it. Dawn isn’t there, but she could easily hide amidst the piles of clothes and things on her floor. Willow rolls her eyes at the mess and goes out into the hall. Tara asks her if she’s doing okay.

“Besides terror about today and a general feeling of impending doom? Swell,” says Willow. Tara gives her a kiss, and promises pancakes for breakfast. She goes downstairs.

Willow knocks on the bathroom door. “Dawnie?” The door swings open. Dawn is brushing her teeth. “Hey, you. Today’s the big day, huh? Kind of day that makes you want to return clogs, don’t you think?”

“I didn’t take your clogs,” says Dawn around her toothbrush.

Willow joins Tara and the Buffybot in the kitchen. The Buffybot is making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Willow wants to take a little time for a final touch-up of her programming.

Tara thinks that Willow has done enough. “She’s either ready to face this thing or she’s not.”

Dawn comes into the kitchen. Tara pours her some juice and asks if she wants funny shaped pancakes, or round.

“Rounds are fine,” says Dawn. “Uh, what’s up with the mega-witches?”

“Oh, I don’t know if you could call us ‘mega.’” says Tara. “Willow, maybe.”

“No. I mean, who’s going to eat all that?” Dawn points to the piles of sandwiches on the counter in front of the Buffybot.

“Oh! Oops. Um…she wanted to help, and I got her started, but I forgot to un-start,” says Tara.

Xander comes in the back door, armed with his toolbox, and sees the sandwiches. Willow tells him to help himself, and the Buffybot hands him a pile. He starts to eat. Willow asks why he’s there. Xander has brought the soldering wire Willow wanted for the Buffybot’s tune-up.

The phone rings. “I’ll get it!” says the Buffybot.

“No!” say Dawn, Willow and Tara together.

“It could be my dad,” says Dawn. “He said he’d call today.”

“I’ll just say hello,” says the Buffybot. “He’s my biological ancestor.”

Willow answers the phone. It’s Anya. Dawn and the Buffybot are both disappointed. Anya has found the item Willow needs. Willow tells the others that she has “that thing, for tonight.” Dawn wonders what she’s talking about but Tara tells her its nothing. Just a Scooby meeting. Spike will be taking care of her.

Willow tells the Buffybot that she should just let the answering machine get the phone if no one else is there. If Mr. Summers ever talks with her, he might figure out something is wrong, and take Dawn away.

“And I want to stay here.” Dawn tells the Buffybot. “With you and Willow and Tara. Understand?”

“I do! I want you to stay here as well.” The Buffybot grabs Dawn in a hug. “You’re my sister.” Dawn, and everyone else is made a little uncomfortable by that.

Xander switches subjects and tells the Buffybot to sit down so Willow can get to work on her. “We need to fix up those fighting skills pronto.”

“Actually, we have bigger worries than her fighting skills today,” says Willow.

“Way bigger,” says Tara.

“I guess,” says Xander. “Depends on how highly you prize punning.”

“I’m serious, Xander,” says Willow. “Buffybot is about to face her most dangerous challenge ever.”

Dawn and the Buffybot walk up to Dawn’s school together. It’s Parent-Teacher Day. Dawn wants to just make a quick circuit around the school so that the Buffybot can be seen taking an interest in her education, but the Buffybot isn’t cooperating. She stops in front of a model made up of white painted bleach bottles and styrofoam, laid out on a table. “What is this?”

“Oh. Um…this is our city of the future.” Dawn picks up one of the few things in it that isn’t white and shows it to her. “I made the hover cars. They’re orange juice cans. See?”

“They’re very nice,” says the Buffybot. “But I—I still don’t understand.”

One of Dawn’s teachers, Mr. Davis, is sitting by the table. “We’re reading Walden. This is a kid’s version of a utopian society. You’ll notice there are no schools, but an extraordinary number of pizza parlors?”

“I don’t think I know of a breed of humans this small,” says the Buffybot. “Who’s going to live here?”

Mr. Davis, and another nearby student give her a perplexed look.

Dawn has moment of panic. She lets out a very fake laugh. “Ha ha… Ha ha ha! Oh, god, she’s always like this. Ha ha ha.” Dawn grabs the Buffybot’s arm and starts to pull her away. “Come on, Wacky Buffy. See you, Mr. Davis.”

Mr. Davis watches them go. “Bye, Dawn.”

The Buffybot and Dawn sit side by side in Dawn’s homeroom class with other students and their parents. Dawn’s teacher, Miss Lefcort, is at the head of the class. “As you can see, we provide the best in progressive learning, but we can’t teach your children unless you do. As parents, you have a responsibility to create the right attitude. To teach your child what school can mean.” The Buffybot’s hand goes up. “Miss Summers?”

The Buffybot stands up, and Dawn cringes. “School is where you learn.” She sits back down and smiles.

“Exactly,” says Miss Lefcort. “Parents let kids focus on school as a social experience rather than a learning experience. We want you to get your kids just as excited about education as they are about the lunch hour.”

“I helped make lunch today,” says the Buffybot.

“Oh?” asks Miss Lefcort.

“Yes. Before school. Peanut butter and jelly. I don’t eat, but Dawn takes one every day.”

“Tell me about it,” says one of the parents. “My kid’s been brown-bagging it even though I paid for the lunch program.” Other parents quickly join in, complaining about the quality of the cafeteria food. The Buffybot looks around and smiles.

Giles sits at his desk, going over the records for the Magic Box. The register report for January looks off, so he asks Anya to pull the files again.

“Are you mad at me?” asks Anya. Giles has no idea what she’s talking about. “Well, then why are you torturing me? You know, I used to punish people like this when I was a demon. I made them double-check spreadsheets for all eternity.”

“I’m sorry if you resent my thoroughness,” says Giles. “But I just won’t be happy leaving until—”

Anya pulls a small statue out of a box beside his desk. “You’re taking the Ramadan Effigy?”

Giles takes it away from her. “It’s not inventory. It’s my personal collection.”

Anya grabs onto the statue and tries to take it back. “Aren’t you Mr. Dicey Semantics? So what? You think you can just take anything you want? Give it!” Giles hangs onto it. Anya keeps pulling, and starts to slap at him. Giles bats at her with the papers in his hand.

Xander comes to see what’s going on. “Okay, when I’m marveling at the immaturity, be scared.” They stop hitting each other, but neither one of them lets go of the statue. “Anya, Giles is going to leave the store to you when he goes. What more do you want?”

“I’m not leaving the store to anyone,” says Giles. “I’m going to England. I’m not dead. I’m still a partner.” He pulls the statue out of Anya’s hand.

“A silent overseas partner,” says Anya.

“Who you should be very nice to unless you want to end up working at Video Hut,” says Xander.

Anya smiles insincerely at Giles, and then turns away. Her smile quickly fades as she walks toward the back of the shop.

Xander follows her. “What are you doing? What kind of gratitude is that?”

“I know. I know,” says Anya. “It’s just— He keeps saying he’s going, and then he doesn’t, and I keep almost being in charge, but then I’m not, and maybe he shouldn’t even be going at all, but we can’t talk about that, and it all just leaves me with this stress and bossiness stored up, and it just leaks out.”

Xander tells Anya that she just needs to be patient.

“I was being patient, but it took too long. I—I miss Buffy. I do, but life shouldn’t just stop because she’s gone.” Anya also doesn’t understand why they have to wait to tell anyone they’re engaged. She thinks it’s happy news. “Happy news in hard times is a good thing.”

“It is, but if things go as planned, everything can be different,” says Xander. “Let’s just hold on. We’ll know more after we talk to Willow and Tara tonight.”

“Fine. Whatever. Just remember that this whole marriage thing was your stupid idea. I didn’t ask to be all crazy.”

Dawn comes into the living room telling Spike how Parent-Teacher Day went. All her teachers were really impressed with the Buffybot. “Miss Lefcort, was, like, ‘Your sister’s an example to us all.’ She wanted to make it National Buffy Day.” She sits down beside Spike on the sofa.

Spike figures it makes sense. “She responded to Buffybot because a robot is predictable. It’s boring, a perfect teacher’s pet. That’s all schools are, you know. Just factories spewing out mindless little automatons.” He looks at Dawn, and her raised eyebrows. “Who go on to be very valuable and productive members of society, and you should go, because Buffy would want you to.”

“Check,” says Dawn. “One mindless automaton coming up.”

Spike gets up, goes to the desk and pulls out a deck of cards. He asks if she wants to play rummy. Dawn tells him that he doesn’t have to stay. Willow and Tara said they’d be back early. Spike isn’t planning on leaving. He pulls the desk chair over to the coffee table and sits down in it.

“But I’m fine alone,” says Dawn. “It’s not like anyone’s coming after me. I’m not the Key. Or if I am, I don’t open anything anymore. It’s over. Remember?”

“I’m not leaving you here by yourself, so forget it.”

“Well, I’m just saying—”

Spike slams the deck of cards down on the table, making Dawn jump. He struggles a moment to get his temper back under control. “No. I’m not leaving you…to get hurt. Not again. Now deal.”

The girl working the late shift at the Espresso Pump locks up when she leaves for the evening. She starts to walk down the street. She senses something behind her, and turns to look, but she sees nothing. She keeps moving down the street, looking nervously over her shoulder. A vampire grabs her and drags her into an alley. This is a fairly young vampire. He was still a teenager when turned, and he’s wearing a Hanson T-shirt. She screams as his teeth near her neck.

“Don’t be scared,” says the Buffybot. “I’m going to kill him.”

The vampire looks up and sees her. “Slayer!”

“You can run away now,” says the Buffybot. The girl runs one way, and the vampire runs the other. “Not you!”

The vampire runs down the alley, chased by the Buffybot. It pulls a dumpster out from the wall and shoves it into her path. The Buffybot goes over top of it, and leaps onto the vampire. The Buffybot gives the vampire a couple of quick punches, and kicks it to the ground. It tries to scramble away while she pulls a stake from her pocket and closes in for the kill.

The vampire finds a bottle and swings it at the Buffybot’s head as she tries to stake it. She staggers back, with sparks coming from a gash in her forehead.

“You—you’re— you’re a machine!” The vampire scrambles to its feet and starts to run again.

“Thank you!” says the Buffybot. “Stop!” The vampire stops and looks back.

The Buffybot starts down the alley toward it, but she swerves aside, and runs into a stack of empty beer barrels. “Vampires, beware.” She runs into the barrels again. The vampire runs away.

Willow turns the Urn of Osiris over in her hands, examining it carefully. She is with Tara, Anya and Xander in his apartment. It wasn’t easy for Anya to find. She went through every supplier the Magic Box has.

“You used a Magic Box supplier?” asks Willow. “What if Giles finds out?”

Anya thinks Giles is too busy not leaving to notice what she’s been doing. “Besides, I ended up getting it on eBay.”

“You found the last known Urn of Osiris on eBay?” asks Tara.

“Yeah, from this desert gnome in Cairo,” says Anya. “He drove a really hard bargain, but I finally got him to throw in a limited edition Backstreet Boys lunchbox for—” Xander interrupts her with a cough. “…a friend.”

Xander has been watching Willow’s examination of the urn. “See you got your somber on, Will. Is the urn not up to spec?”

“It’s the one,” says Willow, “which means it’s time.” Mercury is in retrograde, and they have nearly everything they need.

“But why the sudden rushy-rush?” asks Xander. “I mean, did the bot blow her cover at school?”

“No, she did great,” says Tara. “She impressed all the teachers.”

“And they still thought it was Buffy?” asks Xander.

“Tomorrow night we meet back here,” says Willow.

“Whoa!” says Xander. “Let’s apply the brakes and check the rear and side-view mirrors here. This is deep stuff, Willow. We’re talking about raising the dead.”

“It’s time we stopped talking,” says Willow. “Tomorrow night…we’re bringing Buffy back.”

Act II

Xander and Anya are afraid that Willow is going a little too fast.

“Guys, I need you on board here,” says Willow.

“It’s just… It feels wrong,” says Xander.

“It is wrong,” says Tara. Willow gives her a sharp look. “It’s against all the laws of nature and practically impossible to do, but it’s what we agreed to. I-if you guys are changing your minds—”

“Nobody’s changing their minds, period,” says Willow.

“Excuse me? Who made you the boss of the group?” asks Xander.

“You did,” says Anya.

“You said Willow should be boss,” says Tara.

“And then you said ‘let’s vote,’ and it was unanimous,” says Anya.

“And you made her this little plaque that said ‘Boss of Us.’” says Tara. “You put little sparkles on it—”

“Valid points all,” says Xander. “But we— I mean— We were just talking then.”

“Xander, I can do this, I promise,” says Willow, “but not without you.”

Anya wants to tell Giles before they go any further, but Willow doesn’t want any of the others involved. “Not Giles, not Spike, not Dawn. They might not understand.”

“What if something does go wrong?” asks Tara.

“I’m telling you it won’t,” says Willow.

“Scenario:” says Xander. “We raise Buffy from the grave. She tries to eat our brains. Do we, A) Congratulate ourselves on a job well done—”

“Xander, this isn’t zombies,” says Willow.

“Zombies don’t eat brains, anyway, unless instructed to by their zombie masters,” says Anya. “Lot of people get that wrong.”

“This isn’t like Dawn trying to bring Mrs. Summers back or anything we’ve dealt with before,” says Willow. “Buffy didn’t die a natural death. She was killed by mystical energy.”

“Which means we do have a shot,” says Tara.

“It means more than that,” says Willow. “It means we don’t know where she really is.”

“We saw her body, Will,” says Xander. “We buried it.”

“Her body, yeah. But her soul? Her essence? I mean, that could be somewhere else,” says Willow. “She could be trapped in some sort of hell dimension like Angel was, suffering eternal torment just because she saved us, and I’m not going to let her… I’m not going to leave her there. It’s Buffy.”

“What time do we meet?” asks Xander.

Willow lets herself in the front door of the Summers house.

“Willow!” says the Buffybot, and starts toward her. She knocks over a table, and walks into the wall. Spike catches the vase off the table before it hits the floor.

Willow is instantly worried about Dawn, but Spike tells her she’s upstairs in bed. “But the bot here seems to have got into a scrape while she was on patrol.”

Willow looks at the gash on the Buffybot’s head. “I think my feet are broken,” says the Buffybot.

Willow guides the Buffybot to the sofa, and sits her down. It looks like she’s got a short in her navigation system. She sends Spike to the kitchen to get a flashlight.

“She wanted to go out and look for you again,” says Spike as he heads toward the kitchen. “But I figured there were enough things in Sunnydale that go bump in the night.”

“But my homing device locates you when I’m injured,” says the Buffybot. “I am programmed to go to you.”

Willow thinks that this time Spike was right. It was a good idea for the Buffybot to stay put. She lifts the Buffybot’s shirt and plugs her iBook into an access port in her abdomen.

Spike has returned with the flashlight. The Buffybot looks up at him. “Sorry I questioned you, Spike. You know I admire your brain almost as much as your washboard abs.”

Spike clenches his jaw. “I told you to make her stop doing that,” he tells Willow.

“I did!” says Willow. “I mean, I thought I got all that stuff out of the program.”

“Well, you’ve got her opened up,” says Spike. “Fix it.”

Willow will see what she can do, but she has a lot of work to do. She asks Spike to shine the flashlight on the Buffybot’s damaged head. “Spike?” She looks around, but Spike is already on his way out the door.

“Did I say something wrong?” asks the Buffybot. “I think Spike stopped liking me.”

“That’s not true,” says Willow. “He thinks you’re swell.”

“Then how come he never looks at me anymore? Even when he’s talking to me.”

“He just gets cranky, the way vampires do,” says Willow. “Now just relax. I am going to make you good as new. I promise.”

Willow sleeps in Tara’s arms in their bed.

Dawn lies awake in her bed, staring at the ceiling. She gets out of bed and goes out into the hallway. She opens the door to Buffy’s room and looks in. The Buffybot is lying on the bed, her systems shut down, and hooked up to a battery charger. Dawn gets onto the bed beside the robot, rests her head on its shoulder and goes to sleep.

Giles puts the Buffybot through her paces in Buffy’s training room. He holds up his hands with pads on them while she goes through a quick series of punches. He tells her she’s doing fine, but she should remember her breathing. The Buffybot takes a deep breath, and blows it out while repeating the exercise.

“That’s good,” says Giles, “but, uh…think of the breath as Chi, air as a life source.”

“I don’t require oxygen to live,” says the Buffybot.

“Of course, strictly speaking, but—”

“Uh, maybe you should stick to the standard drill,” says Anya from the doorway. “You know, you don’t want her to blow another gasket.”

“I’m testing her responses after her injury,” says Giles. “I see no harm in imparting a little eastern philosophy.”

Anya thinks that the concept of “Chi” might be beyond the Buffybot’s grasp. “She’s not the descendant of a long line of mystical warriors. She’s the descendant of a toaster oven.”

“Yes, well, I appreciate your input, Anya, but I think Buffybot has responded nicely to our sessions.”

“Well, you’re the boss.” Anya turns and starts out the door. “Still.”

The Buffybot asks if Giles wants to test her again, but he doesn’t think that will be necessary. He takes off the pads and puts them on top of a stack of floor mats. “Perhaps Anya’s right. Perhaps I am trying to teach you as if you were a…”

“Human?”

“Yes.”

“I like your teachings,” says the Buffybot. “Every Slayer needs her Watcher.”

“I’m not so sure about that,” says Giles.

“What do you mean?”

“Nothing.” Giles leans against the mats. “I just can’t help but wonder if…she would have been better off without me. Buffy.”

“I don’t think that’s true. You were very helpful to her.”

Giles lets out a bitter laugh. “Right. Yes, I was a perfect Watcher. I did what any good Watcher would do— Got my Slayer killed in the line of duty.”

“Oh, that wasn’t your fault.”

“Of course not,” says Giles. “That’s how all Slayer/Watcher relationships end, isn’t it? She’s gone. I did my job.”

“Then why are you still here?” asks the Buffybot. Giles doesn’t have an answer for that one.

The vampire who got away from the Buffybot brags about his victory in a demon bar. The bar is full of demons from the Hellions biker gang, and their hangers on.

The demon Mag—a big ugly guy who looks like his face is held on by leather straps attached to loops embedded in his cheeks—has a hard time believing that this little vampire survived an encounter with the Slayer. He grabs the vampire by the throat and picks him up. “You lying to me?”

“I swear on all that’s unholy,” says the vampire. “You haven’t even heard the best part. I cut her, right? And she’s… I don’t know, some kind of machine. She’s not human. I’m telling ya, it wasn’t even the Slayer, man. It was like a trick. A robot.”

Mag drags the vampire across the bar to the booth where his gang leader—Razor—is enjoying some female demon company. Razor wants to know what the deal with the blood rat is. Mag tells the vampire to repeat his story.

The vampire starts into his very lopsided description of the fight again. Mag makes him skip ahead to the Slayer being a robot part. “A robot, yeah. And I kicked her synthetic ass. You should have seen the sparks.”

Razor rises to his feet. He towers over the vampire. “You’re telling me there’s no Slayer in Sunnydale?”

“That’s what I’m saying,” says the vampire. “They got some kind of decoy standing in for her. Town is wide open.”

“Nowhere like the hellmouth for a party,” says Mag. “There’s all kinds of bad in that place.”

The vampire pats Razor on the chest. “Ha ha. I guess with your muscle, you could own it in no time.” He knows these guys don’t usually let vampires hang with them, but he hopes they will make an exception this time, since he provided them with this great info.

Razor rips his head off. The vampire’s body falls to the floor and explodes into dust. “I’ll think it over.” He brushes the dust from the vampire’s head off his hands. “Let’s ride!”

The demons of his gang—about a dozen in all—head out to their motorcycles, start them up, and ride toward Sunnydale.

Act III

Willow kneels on a blanket in a clearing by a pond in the woods. She is wearing a white dress, with a white jewel hanging from her necklace. All is serene. A duck swims in the pond behind her.

Willow pours some powder onto the blanket in front of her.

“Adonai, Helomi, Piné.
Adonai, Helomi, Piné.
The gods do command thee from thy majesty.
O Mappa Laman, Adonai, Helomi.
Come forward, blessed one, know your calling.
Come forward, blessed one.”

A fawn walks into the clearing. Willow holds out her hand and it walks up to her. It nuzzles her hand.

Willow grabs the fawn, picks up a knife and stabs it into the fawn’s throat. She holds it as it struggles.

“Accept our humble gratitude for your offering.”

Willow looks around nervously.

“In death…you give life.
May you find wings to the kingdom.”

She remains kneeling on the blanket. Her hands stained by the fawn’s blood.

Willow enters the Magic Box. She has changed out of her white dress, and is wearing a red top, with a matching jewel on her necklace. Tara had expected her before this. Willow tells her that she had to get “that thing.”

Xander tells Willow she can drop the cryptic. Giles isn’t there. “What is ‘Vino de Madre’ anyway?”

“Wine of the mother,” says Willow. “Kind of…black market stuff.”

That surprises Tara. Willow hadn’t told her about that. Willow shouldn’t have gone alone, it could have been dangerous. Anya agrees. The black market can be pretty intense.

“All I know is we have to have it to finish the spell, so…it’s good stuff in my book.” Willow switches the subject. She wonders what they’re all doing there, they weren’t supposed to meet until later.

None of them really felt like waiting on their own. “It’s better if we stay together,” says Tara. Willow asks if she’s got butterflies, but they feel more like bats to Tara.

“You want to look at the money?” asks Anya. “I find it always calms me.” She moves over to the cash register.

Tara thanks Anya for the offer, but she’s okay. Willow assures her that they are fully prepared.

“I know,” says Tara. “I just wish it was time. I can’t stand worrying about it anymore.”

Anya comes out from behind the counter with a piece of paper in her hands. “Well, it’s your lucky day, then. I have something that will distract you.”

“What?” asks Willow.

Xander takes the paper from Anya. His eyes go wide when he reads it. He reads it again out loud for the others. “‘I’ve gone. Not one for long good-byes, I thought it best to slip out quietly. Love to you all, Giles.’”

Giles sits in the departure lounge of Sunnydale Airport, sipping a cup of coffee. He hears Willow’s voice. “You really think we’d let you get away with that?”

Giles looks up and sees them all. Willow, Xander, Anya, Tara and Dawn. “I was trying to avoid a scene, really.”

Willow pulls a hastily made “Bon Voyage Giles” sign out from behind her back. “Like we’d make a scene.”

“Not you. Me,” says Giles.

Anya tells him that they have brought him some lovely parting gifts. She holds up a junk food packet. “Uh, it’s American. Get it? Apple pie? To remind you of all the good food you won’t be eating.”

Tara has a monster finger puppet for him as a Sunnydale souvenir. She bobs it to him on her finger tip. “Grrr! Aargh!”

Xander wanted to get him a can of Old English 800, but the guy who lives in the box in front of the store wouldn’t buy it for him.

“We got your presents at the gas station,” says Dawn. “We were kind of in a hurry.” She hands Giles a card. “Um, we made this in the car. That’s why the letters are all shaky.”

Giles takes the card out of the envelope and reads it. “This is, uh…impossible, really.”

“We just wanted you to know that we’ll miss you,” says Willow. “Uh, but we’ll be okay. We’ll miss you, but we’ll be okay.” Anya promises to take good care of his money.

Giles’ flight is called. It is time for him to go.

“Now?” asks Willow. “We just made it.”

“Just, yes.” Giles turns and picks up his carry on bag. He puts it back down. “Well, if we’re going to do this, let’s do it properly.” He turns to Xander, and after a couple of false starts, neither of them sure what to do, they grab each other in a hug.

Anya and Tara get the next hugs, and then it’s Dawn’s turn. Giles tells her to phone him if she needs anything. “You must promise me.”

“I do,” says Dawn. “I promise.”

Willow gets the last hug. “Willow. I don’t know where to start.”

“Well, maybe you shouldn’t,” says Willow, “I’m trying to be stiff-upper-lippy. You should get going. Don’t you have a life or something?”

“Um, I suppose that’s the question, really. Just, uh…be careful, please.” Giles picks up his bag and walks to the gate. He doesn’t look back.

The group walks away from the airport terminal toward Xander’s car. Willow is worried about what Giles is going to do in England by himself, he never talks about anyone over there. She’s afraid he’ll be lonely.

“He won’t be lonely,” says Tara. “He used to live there before, remember?”

“And I’m sure we’ll talk to him all the time, right?” says Dawn. “It’s not like he’s—”

Tara puts her arm around Dawn’s shoulder. “We’ll call him tomorrow, how about that? See how his flight was. Yeah?” They walk together toward the car.

Xander, Willow and Anya hang a little back. “Can you believe the timing?” asks Xander. “I mean, he’s leaving right when we’re ready to…” He looks to make sure Dawn is out of earshot. “…do the thing tonight.”

“Maybe we should have told him,” says Anya. “I mean, what if it works?”

“He’ll come back,” says Willow.

Xander looks at the sky. “It’ll be dark soon.”

“Yeah. We should get Dawn home,” says Willow. “I want to go over everything one more time. Nothing can go wrong tonight.”

The sun is setting as the Hellions ride past the “Welcome to Sunnydale” sign.

Willow, Tara, Xander and Anya gather at Buffy’s grave in the woods. It is one minute til midnight. Xander and Tara are holding lit candles, and Anya struggles with a lighter, trying to light hers. Willow tells her to hurry up, she doesn’t have any time left. Anya finally gets her candle lit, and they all kneel around the grave, with Willow at its foot.

Willow begins the spell, pouring the fawn’s blood into the Urn of Osiris.

“Osiris,
Keeper of the gate,
Master of all fate,
Hear us.”

Willow dips her finger into the urn, and dabs blood onto her forehead and cheeks.

“Before time and after,
Before knowing and nothing.
Accept our offering.
Know our prayer.”

Willow pours the rest of the blood out onto the grave, and sets down the urn.

Some force grabs Willow’s arms and pulls them out away from her body. Gashes appear on her forearms. Xander starts to move toward her, but Tara holds him back. “No! She—she told me she’d be tested. This—this is what’s supposed to happen.”

“Osiris, here lies the warrior of the people.
Let her cross over!”

Willow gasps in pain as something begins to crawl under the skin of her arms. Xander wants to call a halt to this now, but Tara stops him again. “Xander, she’s strong. She said not to stop, no matter what. If we break the cycle now, it’s over!”

A sound starts to be heard echoing through the trees, like the growling of a pack of angry animals. “Oh, god, what is that noise?” asks Anya.

The Hellions roar down Sunnydale’s main street. Some of them are armed with baseball bats, and start smashing the windows of the cars along the street. Another rides his bike right over a parked car. A woman screams when one of the demons grabs her.

Hellions move out across town, spreading destruction. Mag throws a molotov cocktail at a store front.

Act IV

The things crawling under Willow’s skin move up into her throat. She struggles to continue with the spell.

“Osiris, let her cross over!”

Willow suddenly pitches forward. She catches herself from falling on her face on Buffy’s grave. She looks like she’s about to vomit.

A rattlesnake’s head appears in Willow’s mouth.

“Willow! Oh, my god!” cries Tara as the rest of the snake slithers out of Willow’s mouth, and onto the grass in front of her. “Oh, my god! It’s a test. It’s a test.” she whispers, trying to convince herself.

Spike watches a late movie on TV in the Summers living room. Dawn has gone to sleep on the sofa. He hears the sound of motorcycle engines, and trash cans being knocked over. He goes to the window to see what’s going on. A group of the demon bikers are trashing the house across the street.

The noise has awakened Dawn. She joins Spike at the window and asks what’s going on. He pulls her away and goes and locks the front door. He tells Dawn not to move while he goes to check the rest of house.

Mag breaks the window of an electronics shop, and starts looting it. He picks up a DVD player.

“That doesn’t belong to you,” says the Buffybot. “Put it back, or—”

Mag puts back his head and lets loose an ear splitting shriek. All the Hellions nearby drop what they’re doing, and come in response to it, including Razor.

“Slayer. I’ve been hearing interesting things about you.”

“Yes. I am interesting.” The Buffybot looks around at the demons surrounding her. “These your friends?”

“They’re my boys, yeah,” says Razor.

“Good,” says the Buffybot. “Now tell them to get back on their loud bicycles and go back wherever they came from.”

“Or what, you’ll electrocute us?” Razor punches the Buffybot, and knocks her back into a couple of Hellions who grab onto her arms. Razor holds up his hand, and serrated metal claws spring from his fingers. He rakes them across the Buffybot’s shoulder, laying open the circuitry “You’re nothing but a toy, a pretty toy. Want to play?”

The Buffybot kicks Razor in the crotch, and breaks free from the demons holding her. “I would, but you’ve injured me. I have to return to Willow.” She fights her way through some more of the demons before she gets into the clear, and starts to run.

“Get her!” yells Razor. “Stop her!” The demons mount their motorcycles, and take off after her.

Light swirls around Willow.

“Osiris, release her!”

The Buffybot runs into the clearing. “Willow! I need service!” The Hellions are right behind her. They roar into the clearing too. Xander, Tara and Anya jump to their feet, while Willow remains transfixed in the light surrounding her. The demons circle the grave.

One of the demons runs over the grave, and smashes the Urn of Osiris.

“Noooo!” screams Willow. The light around her vanishes, and she collapses onto the grave.

Xander rushes forward and grabs Willow. He tells Tara and Anya to run, picks up Willow and carries her into the woods.

Tara and Anya run the other way. One of the demons chases after them on its bike. It grabs Anya and starts to carry her off. Tara conjures a fireball and throws it at the demon’s back. It drops Anya. Tara grabs her and helps her into the trees.

Xander sets Willow down by a tree. “Willow. Willow! Are you okay?”

Willow starts to wake up. “Did it work?”

”Sorry.” whispers Xander. Willow passes out again.

Six feet below the ground light gathers around the shrivelled corpse of Buffy Summers. It starts to reconstitute, the flesh growing back and renewing. Buffy’s eyes open, and she gasps for breath.

To be continued…

Death Toll