a dangerous game

It's never a good thing to be at war with a member of your own family.

Nevertheless, Meera has found me to be a more worthy adversary than she expected. I will not go quietly into the dark night. I will not go down without a fight! When the smoke clears and the air is still, I will emerge victorious!!! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!

Seriously, though, I read this article a few months back about the methods the United States were going to be using to torture <ahem> interrogate Saddam Hussein. The author claimed that the US government would only be using those methods of interrogation sanctioned by the Geneva Convention. Basically, you're allowed to deprive prisoners of sleep. And a couple of other minor things. But sleep is the big one.

I fear that Meera has read the same article.

She has chosen 5:00am as a starting point for her activities. Except on the weekends. Then she begins at 7am. Either way, she chooses the time so that it robs me of my last precious thirty to ninety minutes of dreamland. She does this on purpose. I'm sure of it.

The first time I hear her start to whine, I take care of the obvious for her. Food. Yes, yes, yes, Meera. I'm coming. Bowl of dry food. Fresh water. Teaspoonful of tuna. Back to bed.

Ten minutes later, she's at it again with the whining. I move down the list. Hmm. Sun's up. Birds outside. I'll open the front door and let her watch through the screen. She seems to be satisfied. Back to bed.

Another few minutes go by (I'm no longer counting at this point) and she's back. MEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOW

<sigh> Okay, now we'll try the window blinds above my desk. Sometimes she likes to sit up there and look out the window.

Nope. Back again. Okay, this time I'll pick her up and get her to snuggle with me in bed for awhile. That doesn't work, and now I'm bleeding all over my sheets. They're just scratches, though. No risk of bleeding out. Back to sleep.

For 83 seconds, anyway. MEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOW

Lock her out of the room. That's it! Lock her out! SCRATCHSCRATCHSCRATCHMEOWMEOWMEOWSCRATCHSCRATCHSCRATCH

At this point, the alarm clock goes off and she officially wins.

That was this morning. You are playing a dangerous game, my sweetie. A dangerous game. Remember, you like to sleep during the day!

So today I followed Meera around, and every time she plopped down somewhere to take a nap, I was right there behind her: MEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOW

But I'm afraid that I have no long-term plan for this. I'm hoping she'll be a little more sleepy tonight, but I fear for the morning . . .

Posted: Sun - March 21, 2004 at 10:17 PM

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a dangerous game

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