Position Vacant

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A position is available as puppet dictator of a small Middle Eastern nation

Qualifications required: Graduate degree in Totalitarian Studies, Multiculturalism, Military Government or related area.

Preference will be given to those with prior experience in governmental corruption, censorship of the press, financial embezzlement, and torturing political prisoners.

The successful applicant will run Iraq for the benefit of big oil and the US State department.

Duties also include participating secretly in one or more international drug cartels in order to provide clandestine funding for local CIA liaison personnel.

Those with experience in the development of biological or chemical weapons or other weapons of mass destruction are especially welcome, provided these were tested on bad people like Iranians or Afghans.

Salary is negotiable and will be deposited in a secret Swiss account.

Position starts September 1st, 2003. Applications accepted until July 30.

Apply to: George Dubya Bush, White House, Washington DC (666-555-4444).

The Homeland Security Directorate of the United States of America is an affirmative action/equal opportunity employer that strives to enhance its ability to develop a diverse political establishment and administrative staff and to increase its potential to serve a diverse local population. All applications are welcomed and encouraged, especially those from women, minorities, local criminals and drug dealers.

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Qualifications required: Graduate degree in Totalitarian Studies, Multiculturalism, Military Government or related area. Preference will be given to those with prior experience in governmental corruption, censorship of the press, financial embezzlement, and torturing political prisoners.
The successful applicant will run Iraq for the benefit of big oil and the US State department. Duties also include participating secretly in one or more international drug cartels in order to provide clandestine funding for local CIA liaison personnel.
	Those with experience in the development of biological or chemical weapons or other weapons of mass destruction are especially welcome, provided these were tested on bad people like Iranians or Afghans.
Salary is negotiable and will be deposited in a secret Swiss account. Position starts September 1st, 2003. Applications accepted until July 30. Apply to: George Dubya Bush, White House, Washington DC (666-555-4444).
The Homeland Security Directorate of the United States of America is an affirmative action/equal opportunity employer that strives to enhance its ability to develop a diverse political establishment and administrative staff and to increase its potential to serve a diverse local population. All applications are welcomed and encouraged, especially those from women, minorities, local criminals and drug dealers.