National Gun Rights Lottery Win fun prizes and protect your inalienable right to shoot harmless unarmed herbivorous animals and creepy Democrats!

Do you feel that the only good thing Jimmy Carter ever did was to provide guns, clubs, whips, and chains to Baby Doc's dictatorship in Haiti? Do you admire draft-dodger Bill for putting his own moral scruples against violence aside and putting America first by promoting military action in Ethiopia and Bosnia? Are you ashamed that Sadam Hussein is still there because wimpy George Bush left the job half done? If so, then join those who care about national integrity by entering the National Gun Rights Lottery now!!! You May Already Have Won A Nuclear Warhead!!! Just apply the Yes sticker to the space below and mail in your entry today!!!!
By affixing the Yes sticker in the box above you are agreeing to accept life membership in the NRA, have your firstborn child trained as an agent of the FBI, CIA, or ATF and have your phone company switched back to AT&T.	As an added bonus you will receive three free issues of "Ask Questions Later" magazine. If you forget to cancel it, your credit card will automatically be charged $88.99 per year &endash; a whole 2.5% below the newsstand price. If you do not care about the future of your country, you can try to cancel by calling our 800 number.	Prizes have been provided by assorted large corporations who have tragically lost their sales monopolies in America's puppet dictatorships for the sad reason that most of these bastions of the Free World have crumbled into democracies just like those run by the Soviet Union.