GERRY AUSTIN MUST DIE


or at least retire.

The Eagles won, the Cowboys lost, and the Giants are losing, so life is good in Week 1 of the NFL season. But no matter who wins or loses, life would be infinitely better in Week 2 and beyond if Gerry Austin, the world’s oldest and least competent referee, would quit or retire or finally get fired. He’s slow and indecisive, he runs his crew about as competently as George Bush has run the war in Iraq, and his penalty calls suggest he has already begun a long and painful slide into senility. But worst and most egregious of all are his indefensible decisions on instant replay challenges; when key plays hang in the balance, when a game’s potential turning points demand the very best of its officials, Gerry Austin is at his absolute, inscrutable worst. He doesn’t just get the calls wrong; he butchers them. He mangles them. He massacres them. He ignores the rules, he sees things that aren’t there, and sometimes, I think, he just makes stuff up. The guy’s a disgrace to the game, a menace to both teams, and an embarassment to the league.

Please, Roger Goodell, I beg of you: since you really can't do anything about Terrell Owens, let your first meaningful decision as NFL Commissioner be to rid the league of its second greatest indignity. Put Gerry Austin out to pasture right now, before he ruins one more play, one more call, or one more minute of one more otherwise fair and fun and entertaining game.

Posted: Sun - September 10, 2006 at 10:51 PM          

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