GERRY AUSTIN MUST STOP


his relatives from googling him.

Thin Skin Week continues here at TWM, with the arrival of an email from one Elberta Carter, yet another outraged, half-witted, humor-impaired relative of way-past-his-prime, now-an-embarrassment-to-the-NFL referee Gerry Austin:

You are an idiot! I am a family member of his, don't make me come find you ! Asshole!

Though Ms. Carter does deserve credit for writing directly to me -- unlike, say, Terry Austin, who wrote a long and often incoherent email to the folks at Carnegie Mellon University Relations -- to complain, and though I do have to admire any piece of writing that, comma splices aside, manages to squeeze two insults and one veiled threat into the space of only three sentences, a few simple truths remain:

1) Gerry Austin's relatives need to get over him and themselves.

2) Gerry Austin's relatives need to stop Googling him or Yahooing him or Whateverthehelltheyredoing him, or else learn to live with -- or, better yet, ignore -- what they find.

3) Gerry Austin's relatives need to learn to recognize satire, accept criticism, and write better emails.

(Is it possible these people are related to the Wechts? God help bloggers and editors everywhere if those two gene pools should ever mix.)

Oh. And just for the record: I thought about titling this post GERRY AUSTIN MUST BE DESTROYED, or maybe GERRY AUSTIN MUST BE AS EVIL AS LORD VOLDEMORT, but then I remembered Terry Austin's heartfelt plea for the children, so I thought I would stick with something simpler and much less horrifying. After all, with people like Elberta Carter in their family, they must be terrified enough.

Posted: Tue - September 25, 2007 at 08:49 AM          

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