BAD FRUIT


capitalists killed my cola

From the if it ain't broke don't fix it department:

Though the ads and labels and commercials promise Great New Taste, the re-engineered flavor of Wild Cherry Pepsi is anything but. (Unless by great they mean watered-down and by new they mean like old diet soda.) What was once my second-favorite soft drink is now only a shadow of its former flavor; the cherry taste is much less prominent, less distinctive, a distant memory on the taste buds of possibility. This seems to me a particularly foolish retreat, running away from the taste that gives name to your product. Call me crazy, but I'd suggest that people who don't like a wild cherry flavor in their Pepsi shouldn't be drinking a product called Wild Cherry Pepsi.

But then I don't remember hearing a hue and cry from drinkers of fruity colas, boldly demanding less-bold beverages. And I can't remember the last time I saw someone take a swig of Wild Cherry Pepsi and declare, Damn, that's too wild and way too cherry. So I suppose this came from the suits, the number crunchers, the restless M.B.A. swill merchants who, unhappy with recent market share, decided they could gain a half percent, perhaps, if they lost a little bit of cherry.

But they forgot one sad, simple truth: if you lose too much of the cherries, you're only left with the pits.

Posted: Tue - January 11, 2005 at 07:23 PM          

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