YOUR DICK IS TOO SMALL!!!


- This was the subject header of my favorite spam email of the week. I love the urgency of it.

Coming in a close second was one with the subject heading, "Hey There", which, itself, wasn't so funny as much as the fact that it was from "Condoleeza Rice <harlie_Rosado@est.it>" Apparently our National Security Advisor is barely legal and has a webcam that she'd love for us to check out.

Anyhow, back to the subject of my tiny dick - I wholly prefer to be courted with, say, the tantalizing aspect of "better please <my> woman!!!", or the possiblity that "She won't believe here eyes" (yes it actually said "here"). "YOUR DICK IS TOO SMALL!!!" is simply an insult. It is no better than the spam I received sometime last year with the subject, "Satisfy your woman, you pindick". Sales are about service. Thank you, but I think I will not be buying any penile growth products from you.

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"American Monsters 2" is over. I'd like to think that I'm done for the year, but every time I let my guard down, something comes up. It's making me paranoid.

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I got a very passive aggressive letter from the Republican National Committee asking why I've abandoned them. I haven't been a Republican since college. It's like hearing from an ex-girlfriend for the first time in 10 years and the first thing she says is "You were supposed to call me. I was waiting." Psycho bitch.

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Per my previous post, the left leg on my Abercrombie and Fitch jeans - the only jeans I have that had no holes in them - is slowly disintegrating. This is ridiculous.

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Posted: Wed - November 30, 2005 at 08:22 PM             |

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