Our play is inspired - our bidding so true!
We're constantly willing - to educate you!
Why won't you just listen? - We haven't a clue!
One man in a million may overbid a bit.
Now and then he'll make a doubtful double.
Or perhaps he'll stretch a preempt just a whit.
But by and large his bidding keeps him out of trouble!
Why won't my partner - bid clearly like me?
My bids are so daring - so thrilling to see!
Precise and so lucid - you surely agree!
It's got to be her fault - when I'm doubled down three!
Why must a woman - play cards like a dame?
Men analyze quickly - the faults of her game!
We're kind and so gentle - to cover her shame!
Why can't a woman - admit she's to blame!
One man in a billion may raise his voice a tad.
Now and then he'll fail to thank the dummy.
At times he may reveal a face that's slightly sad.
But on the whole men who play bridge are rather chummy!
Why can't a woman - behave like a bloke?
She tells you to hush up - when you tell a good joke!
She says that you smell bad - when you go for a smoke!
Then calls the director - each time you revoke!
If I forgot to lead your suit, would you be cranky?
(Of course not!)
If I finessed you, would you pout and ballyhoo?
(Nonsense!)
If I trumped your trick would you pull out your hanky?
(Never!)
Why can't a woman - act like you!
Why are the ladies - so damn querulous?
Men play with such logic - no strain and no fuss!
With marvelous tactics - which we love to discuss!
Why can't you women - play like us !!!!
