Psychopaths at Work (and the White House...)


I've always found it difficult to fathom how corporate managers are so often able to treat people as they do and still manage to sleep at night. I mean, to be able to tell someone who's been a loyal, hard-working employee for many years, that their job is now being shipped to India and they're being laid off, takes something . . what? True grit? Solid self assurance? Maybe, but according to a new, upcoming book, it's probably just an unhealthy helping of good old-fashioned psychopathy!

According to a new book, "Snakes in Suits: When Psychopaths Go to Work," due out later this year, nearly one out of every 100 adults fits the description of a psychopath. We're not talking about the totally gonzo, Hannibal Lechter variety here; we're talking about the more docile, garden variety psychopath who, if they happen to be your supervisor, you cube neighbor, or President of the United States, can make you life a living hell!

Here's what one of the book's authors had to say in a Washington Post article:
"The business world has changed. The old dinosaur model of an overly structured bureaucracy with many rules and closed culture doesn't cut it any more. Companies have to be swift, fast, less bureaucratic. This is an open invitation to the individual with psychopathic tendencies. The new corporate climate is an improvement over the old model because it makes work more pleasant, more creative and it's conducive to getting more things done. The downside . . . is that it makes it easier for psychopaths to enter and succeed."

So what are some of the warning signs of psychopaths in the workplace? Here's a short list:
  • Comes across as smooth, polished and charming.
  • Lies to co-workers, customers, or business associates with a straight face.
  • Has created a power network in the organization and uses it for personal gain.
  • Fakes sincerity with great conviction.

Hmmm. That not only describes many managers I've had through the years, it also describes the man currently occupying the White House! My own experience indicates that the above list leaves out some of the more important warning signs. Here's my collection of the top ten telltales for identifying psychopaths in the workplace:
10. Dried animal pelts covering that ergonomic office chair.
9. Frequent requests to search for weapons of mass destruction, "in your pants."
8. "Custom" computer keyboard on which all the keys have been replaced by human teeth (I should have sensed something...).
7. In addition to adorable pictures of the family, each push-pin on the office bulletin board also secures some form of dead insect.
6. Instead of start and end blocks, all project flow charts begin and end with skull and crossbones.
5. Proudly bragging about "helping to elect Bush in 2000."
4. Proclaiming, "I've been there!" after every new Martian photo appears in the newspaper.
3. Frequent warnings of, "don't take it personally; I forgot my meds this morning."
2. Insistence that weekly status report be submitted by Friday morning..written in human blood.

...and the number one psychopathic tendency to watch out for...

1. Shows up for work in a fighter pilot's flight suit to convince co-workers of job worthiness.

Posted: Tue - January 27, 2004 at 10:34 AM          

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