Whatever happened to boring speeches by the principal?


I didn't sign up for a rock concert

For the first time since I've had a child enrolled at Large High School, I went to the annual Academic Pep Assembly.

Yeah, it chuffs my geeky little heart no end that academics get their own assembly just like the start of football and basketball seasons, and homecoming. At my small-town high school a gazillion years ago, there was an awards assembly the last week of school which consisted of the staff reading out which academic awards had been won by which seniors, and them walking across the stage. It was over in about an hour, and everybody slept through it. I think I even had to be nudged with an elbow to go up and receive a couple, because I was half-asleep when they called my name.

Large High School has the Renaissance program which involves all four grades. Local businesses provide discounts to students with good grades. All these students are seated after the assembly starts in a long parade. The person in each class who has brought their grade point average up the furthest during the year is honored. Of course there are things at every grade level -- State Scholars' Academy, Boys' State and Girls' State, etc. And the typical senior-ish stuff: Bright Flight, National Merit, perfect ACT and SAT scores, appointments to the military academies, Bausch & Lomb, etc., etc.

But in-between pieces of this were skits and performances. The bleedin' teachers even danced. All amplified to ear-spliting levels to be heard over the roar of 2000 kids (yes, I know -- if it's too loud, you're too old. I had a sinus headache, 'kay?) and accompanied by flashing lights and smoke. In a high school gym, folks.

I left after #1-Son's achievements were announced, even though it meant I missed the jazz band's performance. (I like jazz band. Another high school leftover.) My head was about to split in two.

But what I really want to know is how the hell they could manage to spell Naharajan correctly and mess up our last name? Five little letters, people. It ain't Smith or Jones, but it's the next one in line... Seriously, we're not Welsh.

Posted: Wed - March 11, 2009 at 10:23 AM   Home         | | View Technorati reactions

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