Toothfish, Anyone?


Some products need new names.

Imagine reading a menu description of the following entree:
Grilled Patagonian Toothfish topped with Chinese gooseberry salsa

Hungry yet? If you’re like most Americans, these ingredients don’t sound exactly, um, delicious. But they are! And you probably have eaten them before and thoroughly enjoyed them. Let’s try again.
Grilled Chilean Seabass topped with kiwi salsa

Better, right? Thymus Glands with Prunes for dinner? No? How about Sweetbreads with Dried California Plums? Better? I think so. What you call your product is not irrelevant!

Years ago, the brilliant marketers of the Patagonian Toothfish knew that their fish was unlikely to be embraced by Americans with such an un-embraceable name. So, they rechristened their fish as the more pleasing Chilean Seabass and voila! The product has been so popular that it’s practically on the endangered species list.

Those clever marketers in New Zealand renamed the exotic Chinese Gooseberry as the fuzzy, furry, friendly “kiwifruit” and the rest is history. It was New Zealand’s most famous export before the Lord of The Rings hit the screen.

And recently, the California Dried Plum Board came to the recent realization that Prunes were being unfairly maligned because of their high-fiber functionality. Dried apricots carried none of the same baggage so it made sense to re-launch the prune as a dried plum.

There’s a fish formerly called Dolphin, that’s now known as Mahi-Mahi. While the dolphin fish is not related to the mammals we love to visit at SeaWorld, nevertheless, you can imagine little Billy’s horror at seeing his friend on the menu at Red Lobster.

I can think of a few other foods that could use a Marketing Moniker Makeover. Cases in point:

Pork Butt: Are you kidding me? Most people’s first reaction is, “Why would I want to eat that part?”

Trockenbeerenauslese. Will someone please tell the German wine marketing board that Americans will not drink wine, no matter how delicious, if it’s name contains more than 5 syllables. Can anyone pronounce this?

Head Cheese. No comment necessary.

But sometimes a cute name isn’t enough. A friend points out that the Jerusalem Artichoke (which is neither from Jerusalem nor an artichoke) didn’t exactly take off once it was rebranded the Sunchoke. Maybe using the word CHOKE just isn’t a good idea when you’re trying to sell something that people are supposed to eat.



Posted: Tue - March 22, 2005 at 06:08 PM        


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