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Published On: Apr 26, 2006 10:02 PM
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Published On: Apr 26, 2006 10:02 PM
Mmmm... Butter
I've become extremely paranoid lately. I'm sure
that something's out to get me, and it's not cookies this
time.
I keep looking behind everything, searching for that hidden dagger. I search diligently, and more often than not, I find it...
Partially hydrogenated vegetable oils.
DAH DUH DUHHHHHHHHHHH......
Partially hydrogenated vegetable oils are the Loki of the culinary universe (Foodheim). Basically you take a vegetable oil, and you dissolve hydrogen gas into it. The result? A solid oil, such as margarine, shortening, Cool Whip, or just about anything labeled "Low Fat."
Oh, if only I could believe that.
It's true, as far as it goes. Partially hydrogenated oils aren't fat. Fat is an animal product, for the most part. Unfortunately, your body doesn't know the difference. It knows how to handle fats -- it stores them, and converts them into energy. Partially hydrogenated oils look like fat, so it does the same thing with them. Unfortunately, your body doesn't know how to turn them back into energy efficiently, so you're mostly stuck with them, and the effects can actually be worse than just going ahead and eating the fat in the first place.
So tonight I said "Screw it. I'm going to make BUTTER." Nice thick butter. 100% dairy fat, with any non-fat liquids drained right out of it. There are lots of substitutes for butters and oils, such as fruit purees (applesauce is the most common), and you can use them in most baking. Sometimes, though, you just need a solid.
So I went to cookingforengineers.com, an awesome site that has all sorts of esoteric (and just teric) cooking information and recipes. Here's their procedure for making butter. My comments:
You can use a hand mixer with a bowl, but use a deep one. If you just washed dishes, put them away before you do this, or they'll probably get all spattered with various stages of cream/butter.
Be patient. I used homogenized, ultra-pasteurized heavy whipping cream, and it did butt, but it took quite a while. Amuse yourself by watching the cream and thinking about what you could do with each stage (butter cream frosting....).
Don't expect to save money on this. It was fun, but it's more expensive than just buying butter in the first place. You might want to make butter like this for special occasions, though.
Give it a try. It's yummy. Expect to smell like a churnery (or buttery, or whatever they called those places where they churned butter. I hope they didn't call it a butt, because I don't want to smell like a butt) by the time you get done.
Enjoy!
I keep looking behind everything, searching for that hidden dagger. I search diligently, and more often than not, I find it...
Partially hydrogenated vegetable oils.
DAH DUH DUHHHHHHHHHHH......
Partially hydrogenated vegetable oils are the Loki of the culinary universe (Foodheim). Basically you take a vegetable oil, and you dissolve hydrogen gas into it. The result? A solid oil, such as margarine, shortening, Cool Whip, or just about anything labeled "Low Fat."
Oh, if only I could believe that.
It's true, as far as it goes. Partially hydrogenated oils aren't fat. Fat is an animal product, for the most part. Unfortunately, your body doesn't know the difference. It knows how to handle fats -- it stores them, and converts them into energy. Partially hydrogenated oils look like fat, so it does the same thing with them. Unfortunately, your body doesn't know how to turn them back into energy efficiently, so you're mostly stuck with them, and the effects can actually be worse than just going ahead and eating the fat in the first place.
So tonight I said "Screw it. I'm going to make BUTTER." Nice thick butter. 100% dairy fat, with any non-fat liquids drained right out of it. There are lots of substitutes for butters and oils, such as fruit purees (applesauce is the most common), and you can use them in most baking. Sometimes, though, you just need a solid.
So I went to cookingforengineers.com, an awesome site that has all sorts of esoteric (and just teric) cooking information and recipes. Here's their procedure for making butter. My comments:
You can use a hand mixer with a bowl, but use a deep one. If you just washed dishes, put them away before you do this, or they'll probably get all spattered with various stages of cream/butter.
Be patient. I used homogenized, ultra-pasteurized heavy whipping cream, and it did butt, but it took quite a while. Amuse yourself by watching the cream and thinking about what you could do with each stage (butter cream frosting....).
Don't expect to save money on this. It was fun, but it's more expensive than just buying butter in the first place. You might want to make butter like this for special occasions, though.
Give it a try. It's yummy. Expect to smell like a churnery (or buttery, or whatever they called those places where they churned butter. I hope they didn't call it a butt, because I don't want to smell like a butt) by the time you get done.
Enjoy!
Posted: Tue - October 25, 2005 at 10:09 PM