Many Mini-Meltdowns



I have a new job.

Not yet, really, but I have accepted a new position within the same organization. It's definitely a step up. I saw the job posting, applied, was interviewed, and, to my own surprise, was offered the job. I didn't really... well, at first I was positive I would get it. I could picture it very clearly -- you know that feeling, when you know something will happen because you can visualize it perfectly? It was like that. Then I had the interview, and convinced myself it was a terrible interview, so I was actually surprised when they offered me the job. Although surprising, it was normal. Just another job; just another move, this time to Washington DC...

Then I began to freak out.

I was already planning on just loading up the Jeep, driving to DC and getting a furnished tiny apartment. I still am. That's not freaky. What keeps freaking me out is the streams of emails coming in from those tasked to help me with my move. Would I like help selling my house in Kentucky? (What house?) How about help purchasing a home in DC? (WTF?) To what address should the movers come to pack up my household goods (What household goods? What address?)

I know it sounds like all these are just a matter of saying, "No thanks, I don't need help in that area." Of course it is. It's not that. It's just that the level of assistance that I'm being offered suggests to me, much more than the job title or job description, that this is a VERY IMPORTANT POSITION. And that's what's giving me mini-meltdowns.

I'll just be be-bopping along, behaving perfectly normal, when what almost feels like an anxiety attack wells up, and I can't think about anything but this upcoming thing. All other thoughts are driven out of my head, and I start saying (sometimes just to myself, and sometimes out loud), "Breathe. Walk. Breathe. Walk."

I'll be fine, really. I'm excited. I'm stoked. And I'm changing my life to a serious degree. A little bit of meltdown is to be expected.

Right?

Posted: Sat - May 10, 2008 at 01:15 PM       |    


©
Weblog Commenting by HaloScan.com