Green Eggs and Ham


I do not like them, Sam I Am!

When we were in Chicago a few weeks ago, one of the brunch places we ate at offered "Green Eggs and Ham" on the menu. If I remember correctly, this dish was just eggs and ham with a pesto sauce.

Apparently that dish is so 2005. Researchers in Taiwan have created a transgenic, green, fluorescent pig. This isn't that uncommon of a procedure really, there are lots of bacteria that have been genetically transformed to glow under certain circumstances to assist researchers in locating them, understanding biochemical processes, etc. This isn't even the first mammal to get the treatment. I think there have been green bunnies and green kitties, if I remember correctly. (I'll refrain from making jokes about a glowing green pussy.)

I started wondering what it would be like to have transgenic, green, fluorescent people. Club kids would no longer need glow sticks, bicyclists and runners wouldn't need reflective tape on their coats any more, and nightvision goggles would be obsolete. There are literally thousands of advantages that a green, fluorescent human would have over us mere typical homo sapiens. OK, maybe only 3 advantages, but I'm sure I'll think of more soon.

So, I decided to put my considerable scientific knowledge to work and began experimenting on the most convenient human I had at hand. That happened to be my husband. He probably would have objected had he known what I was doing, but fortunately for me and my experiments, he seems to require sleep at night.

[insert maniacal laughter here.]

Here are my results so far. What do you think? The only downside is that his glowing keeps me awake at night.

Ok, so this whole blog post was simply an opportunity to make the "green eggs and ham" joke about the transgenic pig, and to work on my Photoshop skillz. You too can work on your Photoshop skillz by visiting Shop Class .

Posted: Thu - January 12, 2006 at 03:25 PM        

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