 |
|
| I, Lucifer | | Date Created: Apr 06, 2005, 07:51 PM |
 Just finished I, Lucifer: Finally the other side of the story by Glen Duncan.
The premise: Satan has been offered a hell of an opportunity: the chance to get back into heaven, if he can live a decent life for a month inside the body of failed writer Declan Gunn, who has just committed suicide.
The Prince of Darkness then spends his time writing a book as Satan writing a book as Declan Gunn possessed by Satan, which is actually a book written by Glen Duncan ... oh, whatever. The premise isn't actually that important. It's Lucifer's amusing observations about humanity, creation, the Fall, and ice cream that really make up the meat of the book.
Here's a couple passages ... just to tempt you:
"There's a common misconception about me. It's a slander spread by the Church, namely that if you make a deal with me, I'll cheat you. Poppycock, of course. I never cheat. Never have to. Ask Robert Johnson. Ask Jimmy Page. Humans are so deaf and blind to the ambiguities of their own languages, they concoct their wishes in terms so permeable that I can always grant them in a way they never imaged. "I want to be as wealthy as my father." Fair enough. Nelchael crashes the markets, Dad's bankrupt, and thanks for the soul, brother... Any of these transactions is a no-lose situation for me. Even if you get your deal double-entendre-proof, even if, thanks to you dressing your heart's desire in a semantic straitjacket, I'm compact-bound to give you what you want, still, at the end of an incredibly short time ... I'm going to get my hands on your soul. How can I put this? You really don't want that to happen.
....
"... In fact maybe now's as good a time as any to tell you: if you're gay, you go to hell. Doesn't matter what else you spend your time doing -- painting the Sistine Chapel, for instance -- knob-jockey? Down you go. (Lezzers are borderline; room for manoeuvres if they've done social work.) The entire masterpiece fueled by the stiffened brush softened in the wrong pot. Another superb irony lost on His Lordship. Not a titter. Just consigned Michelangelo to my torturous care. Awful shame really. (Had you going, didn't I? Don't for heaven's sake, take everything so seriously all the time. Heaven's bulging with queer souls. Honestly."
...
Lucifer's ... er ... Gunn's ... um ... Duncan's writing style is witty and quick, and sinfully funny. His endless tangents would be damned annoying in the hands of any other writer, but you find yourself reading and re-reading them just to catch everything. There's really only one character in the book, Lucifer (of course). The rest of the people are just there to give The Father of Lies something to do with his time ... and a devil of a time he has!
Obviously this book is a one trick pony: Satan writes a book. That's it. Fortunately, Duncan doesn't try to stretch it too far. He tells his story, has a good time doing it, and ends.
I give this book two pitchforks way up!
On a side note, this book contains a fair amount of all that apocryphal angelic gobbledegook that the Papists, er ... Catholics get on about. You know ... all the angels and archangels with all those names that are never mentioned in the Bible, blah, blah, blah. I kept thinking as I was reading this book, "Where the hell did they get all this stuff?" Sure, Michael and Gabriel are mentioned in the Bible, but what about all the others? Another question that kept bugging me was that "Lucifer" translates as "The Morning Star." However, Jesus is also referred to as "The Morning Star" in many songs and in the Book of Revelation. I couldn't figure this out ... but fortunately the internet came to my aid. Apparently, I was using the wrong translation of the Bible. (warning, that link may cause you to giggle.) Glad I got that cleared up! Anyway, enjoy the book. |
|
|
|
|
